Love help: I’ve been questioning a lot of things lately…mainly about “the one”. - Help.com

briannafersure
offline Verified (2 years, 2 months) Visit briannafersure's shoutbox
El Dorado, KS, US

I’ve been questioning a lot of things lately…

mainly about “the one”. I’ve always wondered, how can we find the one person we wanna spend the rest of our lives with in one spot of the world. There are billions of people out there and we find the one person in a population of like 12,000 or maybe a little more. But then, the next thought comes to mind. God put us where we are in the world…in one specific country or state. So, that we can find happiness in that one spot and not have to play a horrible long game of “where’s waldo”. So, the next time I think I found “the one” I won’t also be saying “there’s always someone better” I mean sometimes there could be someone better and for me there usually is, but it’s gonna be someone that God meant for me to love. I don’t know…am I crazy to be thinking this hard on it?

This open post was written 2 years ago | V/U/S: 149, 3, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post briannafersure may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. briannafersure is a verified member, has been around for 2 years, 2 months and has 48 posts and 38 replies to their name.

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Changedgirl offline Verified User (2 years, 11 months) Long Term User Shouts: 15 #
CA | 2 years ago (2 hours, 42 minutes after post)

I don’t know, but I really don’t think love works like that. I don’t believe that there is one person in the entire universe for you and that your life’s quest is to find that needle in the haystack. I think that people can be compatible with lots of other people and that finding ‘the one’ isn’t necessarily about searching the globe for Waldo as you put it, but just making it work with someone that you have committed to. I really believe that love is 10% natural spark and chemistry and 90% effort and commitment to making it work. This is just my opinion, but this is how I feel.

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Nothere12 offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 46 #
Chicago, IL, US | 2 years ago (2 hours, 43 minutes after post)

…. “The one” is a neo-pagan belief. It is an exaggeration of mortal love. It really has little to do with God in the Christian belief.

I will probably say this a thousand more times before I die. But you are capable of falling in love with many people. Once you are in love, you CREATE “the one”. But it also pays to know how humans love and form relationships. There is really TONS of research on this on a professional level in psychology. If you read about it, it would probably help you gain a REALISTIC view of love.

IF you believe in a childish belief, then you will get childish results.

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briannafersure offline Verified User (2 years, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
El Dorado, KS, US | 2 years ago (3 hours, 3 minutes after post)

I really don’t think i believe in the one…i believe there are many people out there and sometimes i overthink things too much thats y i end up with wrong people…idk

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