my boyfriend needs to grow up.
he is two years young then me. how do i tell him. i love him to much to leave him. im his first girl friend too. so it kills me cuz i spoil him. and he doesnt do the same for me..am i dumb for being with him still?
This open post was written 5 years, 5 months ago | V/U/S: 7,804, 14, 10 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post
Reciprocity (0)
Since writing this post tRiNiTy may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. tRiNiTy is a verified member, has been around for 5 years, 6 months and has 10 posts and 55 replies to their name.
Post Tags (10)
Replies (14)
Where were you?
You can also watch events on Help.com as they happen
Trinity… you are not dumb, you are in love… and love is blind. Now you know why, most women meet up with older men (at least until the woman is older). A woman has to find an older man in order to find one on her level. Maturity however is a critical part to any romantic relationship. If this gap is too large it expresses itself in a communication gap… and without good (excellent) communication, the relationship is due for some very bumpy rides.
Bright blessings ~ Richard
You’re not dumb, but I would encourage you to really consider your relationship. If it’s not making you happy. If he doesn’t make you happy when you think about him more often than anything else, then you might have to consider ending things even though it might hurt. But if thinking about him makes you happy still, then go for it. Tell him that you’re frustrated but you want to try. Talk, because communication truly is important.
Y’know, if you’re his first girlfriend, you could try making it a little fun to teach him how to be in a relationship. I’d definitely become more vocal about your wants and needs, though. Like, gentle hints, or requests. Next time you guys go out to dinner, tell him you’d like to go Dutch. A little reciprocation, right? But if, in the end, he can’t deliver what you need from him, then I’d suggest moving on, though I hate to say it. It’s important to get what YOU need in addition to the other way around. Good luck, though!
You might check out my last post:
http://help.com/post/118680-the-five-…
but we have been goin out for a year n a half. and only now im havin problems with this.
Give him a chance, but don’t just swallow your unhappiness. Tell him how you feel.
i think that you should jsut tell him to grow up because he has a girlfirend and he should start acting like a boyfriend. Well give you better advice tommorrow i have to go to my next class.
my boyfriend broke up with me wiht out saying a word to me. what should i do?????
ok so i did tell him how i felt. he dumbed me three days ago. y??? becuz he needs to get his head stright. he promised me that we would get bak together. and this isnt goin to be forever. i fought with him for a couple days about it. and now im letting him go. sadly. i hate myself for doing it. but i want him to be happy. idk. i tried explaining to him how **** happens. and that the promise can be broken like that. but he still promised me over and over again. i dont want to lose him. he wants his space. but i dont want him to end up with another girl. he said we could still hang out and do the norms. but were jus not together. idk. i think he’s makin a big mistake. but he wont listen to me on that .
hi trinity
i’m going through a similar thing. my partner and i have been together gor 6 years and he still won’t grow up. he needs loads of attention and i’m a 33 year old woman with a busy job. he has never had any responsibilty in is life. idon’t know what to do either. we ahve split up 4 times this year.
helen
I have been having a similar problem, but with me, i bottle it all up and wait for it to explode. In this case though, I would leave him helpful hints, like make a comment here and there of childish things he did. Then one night recently I decided enough was enough and i told him to grow up or we would be over, and I figured if he loved me like he said he would he would try this time. Then i walked out and started to walk home on my own and he ran after me and was crying, got his car and just followed me telling me to get in the car, it was romantic in a way because it proved he was in this relationship and didn’t want to lose me, so i got in the car. Then on the way back to my house he told me he wanted to change, that it wasn’t fair to me, and he was sorry because he felt like his childishness was disrespectful to me and i didn’t deserve that. So now he is definitely trying and I am seeing major improvements. I guess all you need to do is show him that he could lose you. Is his immiturity worth losing the one he loves? that’s the question you want to make him answer.
Same, my b/f is 2 yrs younger than me and i love him very much. My last relationship was abusive and he knows it but sometimes seems to forget and yells about what i think are small issues. He mentioned love and marrage and moving in together to me first.. but now isnt ready, or doesnt want to leave his comfort zone.. he lives at home with mom dear, whereas Im dying to get a place and move outta my familys house which I had to move back into after the breakup of my last relationship. Im starting to feel like Im doing all the work and Ive mentioned this to him several times, he just gets huffy.. I know the sensible thing would be to leave to avoid hurting me any further BUT I truly love him and can see us together for a long time if only he’d grow up. And tbh I dont want to leave no matter how sensilbe it seems.
How do I deal with this? everything I try makes him shirty.. I dont want to argue, though at times i feel the urge to tell him to grow some… I know That wouldnt work. :/
I am having a really similar..and i hate to say problem..but it is..a problem. I am one year older than my boyfriend and i am head over heals in love with him. I would do just about anything to make him happy and make him smile. I love to surprise him and do little special things for him. I cant help it i just love doing things for him..its like a weird little hobby, but i dont feel that he would do the same for me. He always says he loves me and that he is crazy about me, but sometimes i just dont believe it and i fuse at him sometimes and say that i dont think he does enought and appricates me. but of course he thinks he does the world for me, and maybe he does, but i dont see it. I dont want to sound selfish, which i know i really do but relationships are full of give and take and he is not willing to give and take sometimes. Sometimes i will say to myself that i will just stop doing all the things i do for him and maybe that will make me feel like i am not being so under appricated, but its not in me not to do things for him. He is the best and worst things that has happened in my life. I love him so much and i dont want to lose him, but i really need him to step up and take the role in the relationship even it he is younger than me. And maybe thats just it maybe he feels insecure about me being older. I really dont know what to do.
you are not alone baby girl
Invite Others to Help
A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.
