I’m 34 years old and have been depressed for more than
half my life, everyday i think about ending it, but for some reason i keep holding on, i have tried all kinds of docs and prescription drugs, church , family freinds, i can’t keep a job because i can’t get out of bed for days, and i’m tired all the time. does anyone ever feel this way for this long?
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If you have a rational reason to be depressed you should work on that and try to resolve the problem. If you have no reason to be depressed but you just are anyway, you might have clinical depression and you should seek help in dealing with it. I assure you it is ALWAYS worth living. always. I hope you feel better soon
“but for some reason i keep holding on”
Its because the world needs you.
someone once told me I was addicted to my own negativity…….they were right too!
Seriously though..hang in there :-) it does get better, it’s a bit of a chicken and egg think, you are too knackard to get up and do anything but because you are too knackard you don’t generate any energy. It is a real effort just to think about trying right? Maybe you are giving yourself a really hard time of it and are a perfectionist. :-)
Take care and be nice to yourself xx
i love your glasses ;) is that your natural hair color ?
smile :) even if its a fake one … i have to wear one all the time !
depression sux !!!!
thanks for your replies
Oh my God, I just turned 34 in february and had the same exact thoughts. Put on prescription meds at 15, 16, told them I was better. They said no you have to take them. Panic attacks. Hospitalization to try to get off of benzos I never abused. YOu start looking at things, like, can this thing be turned around? What about the weird parralell move job history? Will I ever be on the inside? I don’t want to cut off my family, but the desparity between them and I is so apparent its almost laughable. I know I can’t go on much more. The state of things and me is unacceptable. You are not alone, to use a cliche. Really you are not. I would love to talk to you.
You feel so bad for so long you forget what it was like to feel good.
Every one has a role to play in this world. You also have a purpose and you should never think of ending it. Yes life looks dim and dark at times, maybe even for prolonged durations of time. But that is not the end of the world, there is more to life than lying on your bed or crying. Life is a gift, enjoy it. Live up to YOUR expectations. Do things which you always wanted to do, if you dont have anything to do then find something to do which grabs your interest and stick to it. Who knows you might just make a nice career out of it. So buckle up lady cause LIFE is calling, where are you?
i dont know what to do. at 23 i was divorced with a child. i have a loving family perhaps to loving to the point i feel smothered.i am not 26 met somebody but his parents cant fully except me as i have a child and was married. i am going through a deep depression. they also commented about my physical appearance because i try to maintain myself. i have manicured nails hair extensions and love make up. i am in the process of self loathing and this is causing me to feel depressed please help!
There is nothing wrong in taking care of yourself, depression can be a *****. But look at the bright side you got a wonderful family to take care of you. How many people can actually say that? So thank your luck that you are lucky to have them.
Now about this guy and his family, clearly his family does not appreciate you for who you are and are more interested in the superficial you. So, there is no need to self loath because they don’t get you. Just be the wonderful person you are and you will do good in life.
I feel for you. Life by definition is a struggle. A battle. Go outdoors and look around you and you will see all of nature struggling from insects to mammals and everything in between. I do not intend to sound like a frolicking butterfly-snorting Pagan (although I am) but you are simply locked in lifes epic struggle and havent taken the time to discover who you are and what you want to get out of life. Youre not dreaming so please dont expect to wake up. As a 34 year old male I know where you are because I ideate suicide every day. I dont have any intentions or plans to act on those thoughts however. I am an OEF/OIF US Army veteran and my unit led the attack on Baghdad (we were there before the Marines). I was wounded when an RPG struck the HMMWV I was in which gave me a concussion and four ruptured vertebrae in my back. I suffer from chronic pain and take morphine and vicodin multiple times a day just so I can get out of bed not to mention frequent nightmares related to the combat-induced PTSD. I have a son with autism who also suffers from Shones complex and he has already had two open-heart surgeries. He is seven. Let us both be thankful we are still alive and try to do the very best we can every day. Deal? Someone once said “if a person does their very best, what else is there?”
Hang in there. Good luck and remember to take care of yourself. Start with a hot shower followed by some hot tea. Cheers.
This blog has been so helpful for me. Thanks for posting this I know I’m not alone feel better life is precious.
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