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pleeeeeeeeeeeez dont kill urself

just wait until life gets better it will. i know it will

dont kill yourself, if you have money go and buy some piff. It will put everything in perspective.

brokenwingscantfly wrote:
I use to think that life would get better but, I just dont see anyway of that happening for me. Honestly do you think life gets better for everyone? I think there are some people who dont and cant get better.

I think if anyone tries hard enough, they can make life worth living. I almost killed myself a while back, but then I got clinical help and now my life is pretty nice…very mellow.

brokenwingscantfly wrote:
for the past two years Ive been fighting and determined to get better. I got clinical help, ive been on meds I write to focus, I see a therapist twice a week. I have done nothing but try and try and try to get better. I wake up every day with my bestfriends death on my shoulders,my other friend lost a leg because of me. The families forgive me and so does my friend who lived.That only makes me feel worse. I have tried every form of help I could think of and I still feel like it should have been me who died. I killed my friend it should have been me. I cant change it or take it back, and I just dont know how much longer I can go on like this. Every one says it will get better, but does it always get better for everyone? I have tried so hard to make it better but it gets me no where.

I cant say I know what its like to go through that, mostly because I’ve never had any friends until just last year. I’ve been a dorky looser most of my life, no friends, no girls, no social anything. Thats the main reason I was going to kill myself, I had noone. For the longest time I would just exist, no point to life, an empty void where my life should have been. I wasnt only alone, I was a target.

its very strange i had neighbors he died and with in 6weeks she died and i often asked her how is she coping and she answered, you know every night he is calling me sure enough she died its guild what makes you think of suicide get over it how many soldiers coming back from war killed all kinds of people children young and old innocent people there life is the same you just have to get on in life…

How did your friend die? Was it an accident?

no he died of cancer,but there was nothing wrong with his wife…

If your friend that died could speak to you, I bet he or she would want you to live! I bethe or she would forgive you too.

maybe ,i don’t know how old you are but maybe if you can get your self some money a visa do some backpacking get out of the country for as long as you want ,come to Australia ,go to new Zealand both are beautiful you can work as season worker make some extra money and see the world you just have to get out ,its like a smoker the only way to stop is cold turkey…

Why won’t you forgive yourself? Are you punishing yourself, do you think, and trying to make up for the death?

Was it your choice that you lived? You could have died. I believe God allowed you to live. It was God’s choice you are here.

yeah duh

we all live 4 a reason try and figure it out

Your best friend would forgive you and want you to live, not to suffer. Have you turned to God yet for help?

fine.ur crazy.GOD has 3 answers toevery prayer
1.yes
2.not yet
3.i have something better in mind
bye

God and my relationship with Him has helped me make a lot of sense out of my life, but I am not trying to force my beliefs on you. Just trying to help… Some people find meaning agin if they can do something for their friend like trting to help others that drink by sharing what happened to them. maybe you could help others not do the same thing that happened to you?

Waiting for your reply but it’s getting late where I live. It said on your message that you have “tried everything I can think of”. I encourage you to try God inspite of your doubts about the goodness of God. It might be the help you need. I’ll be praying for you.

ya.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

suicide eh?
haha suicide is not worth it..
think about it
if u died, ur other friends would feel the same way u r feeling now..
and then what comes out of that?
more deaths..
what u should do
is live life for ur friend
im sure he’d do the same for u
and he’d probably be happy for u if u didnt kill urself =]
btw there r always ppl who care
even if it doesnt seem like it

Broken wings, you have been fighting….look at all these posts, comments. Look at your other posts and comments.

Please come back and talk to me. I have to go for awhile today, but I’ll be back to check.

I’m glad you haven’t left your computer, Brokenwings. Keep reaching out. If there is any way I can help, let me know.

Keep being occupied here, Whatever the hell it takes okay. you are worth it. You understand? whatever it takes you are surviving here with me, with us.

I am so sorry to hear all this, but please don’t do something stupid. Suicide makes nothing better, it makes a lot of things worse. If you kill yourself, your friend who lost a leg will then be racked with guilt for letting it get to you so much. You will also be putting a lot of other people into guilt, family, other friends, because they will think that they could have done more to stop you.

Whenever i have contemplated suicide it is always the reprecussions that have stopped me. Killing myself would only hurt the people close to me more. The things you have done have happened, theres nothing you can do about that, but please just carry on and give your friend the love and friendship they have always been given.

hello?
are you still aroud…
well, i just wanted to share that i’m sorry you’re hurting so bad… it sounds extremely painful and i can barely imagine how i would feel… but i know how it feels to see no end and no will to ‘live’ - been thinking of what might be one alternative way that could perhaps bring some sense of comfort… get back to me of you feel i’m being way annoying..
if you’ve ever read ‘man’s search for meaning’ by victor fankl…i remember a great ’story’ from it - he retelles how this old woman/ widdower has just lost all her will to live after her husband died she has no joy and i recall she also wished it was she who died instead of him - and then he reminds her… if she had passed away - then her husband would have had to bear all this pain instead of her..so at least in some ways she is bearing the pain and not him.
i know this might sound ridiculous, but we reeeeeally do not know what appens after death… what we do know is how much people left behind hurt and miss their dear and near because they are no longer physically there… -so in many ways based on what you know - you truly are worse off than they are - so in some ways you’ve already been given the biggest challenge/ burden - but i’m a great believer that if you could not handle it - it would not be there - law of nature and look at you - all tyhe hell you’ve been through and you’re still hanging on - that says someting within you wants to cling on.. i’, not going to give you a lot about how one ought to live the life we have been give etc etc or how things happen for a reason - apart from just underlining how it is human to “err”- and sometimes we need to extend the same compassion we would have for another to ourselves…what ‘positive’ would your self-deterioration add to life etc. - i wanted to say, i’ve been surled up hugging myself on the ground contemplating suicide so i’m never ever judging anyone in that position ever.. just that know life is on its own not permanent…NOTHING is… and so for me, i just wanted to stick it out…even in the depths og the hole…when i knew i ONLY had and will always really only have myself… i’ve decided that i wanted to stick it out… a million people can tell you you are worth it and you are forgiven… but it is you who needs to soul search for whether your heart is big enough for yourself.

This is part of your reply from obove :- No offense but I do not believe in god, I dont think there is a reason to who dies and who lives it, Its timing and placement.

If you realy do believe this, then the timing and/or placement for your own death. has not yet arrived.

The taking of your own life doesn’t make it easier for you. I agree it does in fact make it harder. It is now also a strength.

What do I mean? Well there are many other people who have the same sort of thing happen to them, they like you are feeling wretched about what happened. You know what it feels like. You are in a possition to help those other people.

So all I ask is that you considder my plea to you, please help those other people.

This is a consistant theme brokenwings. Look how many more people are fighting along with you. You can have a life and be in this world.

Again, still a maybe on the number. I am going to check my email and these posts again throughout the day.

Thinking of you. Hoping for you. Hope to talk to you soon.

Everyone makes mistakes..and no matter how awful those mistakes can be, the only thing you can do with them is learn. A lot of people drive drunk and nothing happens.. you on the other hand, paid a big price.. It must be hard, but you have to forgive yourself and learn from it. Now you know you’ll never do that again and you can use that experience to teach others about the dangers of drunk driving.

Plus, by stepping in the car with you knowing you were gonna drive drunk, your friends put themselves at risk. It’s their fault as much as yours. You may have been the driver, but no matter how irresponsible you think you were, so were they by letting you drive them in that state.

By the way, you put me on as a friend last night, and I added you. Thats got to count for something. So lets make it count.

Quite a few times ive driven drunk, and driven friends around.. Ive always felt kinda bad i do it, but not enough to stop.
I read what happened to you and it’s obviously changed you in a big way. I cant imagine what i would go through if that happened to me, I’m not going to drink and drive anymore.
You may have saved my life or my close friends, i hope that counts for something.

Reach out to a higher power, call her or him “Hey you” or “Bob” or whatever you want because there is a good chance this higher power loves you so much that he or she will continue to make your life miserable until you give the higher power a chance.

Give the higher power thanks and praise no matter what comes into your life and for the things that already happened. Just try this as an experiment and see what happens.

It sounds like everyone has forgiven you. It is only you that hasn’t forgiven you.

We all make terrible mistakes. That is called being human.

A few years ago on Valentine’s day a girl in Beaumont, California killed three of her friends because she drank while driving. You may want to do some research and see if you can contact her. Maybe someone else who walked in those shoes would be the most qualified to give support and guidance to you.

I know you said you don’t believe in God, but I do very much and I’ve already said a prayer for you. I’ve asked God to turn your life around and make it something beautiful and happy and meaningful and to bring you in contact with the people and books and natural environment that will give you the healing you need.

Why don’t you take this guilt and experience and perhaps find some way to turn it into a positive. What I mean is that you have such a powerful message now and you could save other’s lives simply by telling your story. It will not bring your friend back or the other friends limb, but at least it will offer a chance to save someone else from making the same mistake you did.

I think this will be reply number fifty.

Out of all of those replies, only yourself wants to punish you for what happened.

A lot of people have come up with find the possitive and work with that.

Dont make yourself another victim, you will then have added another death to the tragedy that happened.

I realize that you dont want to feel the way you do. So can you please stop this self punishment, listen to us and let us help you.

I hope that you can see, that we would be very upset if you cant take the help we are trying so hard to give you.

What I am trying to say if you cant live for yourself, then do it for and with us.

sunshine797 wrote:
Why don’t you take this guilt and experience and perhaps find some way to turn it into a positive. What I mean is that you have such a powerful message now and you could save other’s lives simply by telling your story. It will not bring your friend back or the other friends limb, but at least it will offer a chance to save someone else from making the same mistake you did.

yes, i agree totally

Hi broken wings, thought I would say hello and how glad I am at the efforts you are making.