life help: I am a therapist who needs someone to talk to…isn’t that ironic? - Help.com

Hay if you want to chat do you have msn or yahoo im?

i think that it is really great that you don’t lean on your kids because i ( age 16) was in a co-Dependant relationship with my mother for a few years and we were verry strained because she kept leaning on, it came to the point where she wouldn’t want me to leave the house, or go to my dad’s because she was afraid to be alone. well, i think that is one good choice you’ve made, and just keep you chin up.

I guess elders are in different forms now.. like normal people :)

And it is hard to give advice because some do not want to feel like they are psycho analyzing a psychologist. I have a friend who is also in a troubled (and I mean really bad) relationship and her communication break down is also compared to her partner always saying he doesn’t need her to psycho analyze him he isn’t one of her clients.

I’ts great that you are seeking alternative measures to come to a conclusion however are you not comfortable with using inside resources (internal/external) I know my friends is offered this at her work and it is helping her a lot.

hi don’t worry things are just fine with you..u have to live life as it is…u have your daughters give them most of your time…all i can say for the good and for the better live life to the fullest…god bless yah..and don’t forget to ask GOd’s divine salvation…

Ther eis always help for the helper..whether higher or not . A confidant is not necessarily a degreed therapist etc , you just need to meet an acquaintance or person that you feel at ease with and that you can spill out all the over load. The dreams etc are probably your overload in other forms , I could go into great detail of my dreams and over load but I don’t think on here is a great place to vent such things ( my personal choice / comfortability) :)

Go external if you feel u need professional words of encouragement , other wise like one person said msn can be good just to vent it all out…

Minpin, we would be happy to talk with you and help you sort through your present day problems as long as you are willing and able to put in the effort to make necessary changes in your life. Are you?

Therapist are only human too.

And like all humans, they have moments of weakness, loneliness, anger, unhappiness etc. like the rest of us.

A good book too read is “Feeling Good” by David D. Burns, M.D. (you may have heard about it since you’re in that field).

Either way, hope all goes well with you. Maybe its just a rut you are in / mid-life changes or just time to do something new.

Check out this news clipping: http://www.successuniversity.com/succ…

And this website- http://117027.successuniversity.com/new/

Pay no attention to the signing up for the business aspect of it. Its the programs within that I would like to direct your attention to.

Many great motavional speakers & teachers in a variety of fields that you may find helpful.

I’m presently taken a course on Setting Goals. But their are many others that deal with Leadership, Motivation, Personal Development etc.

Here’s another video you can watch to get an idea of what I’m talking about-

http://www.lesbrownlive.com/

Check it out, if you like it go to the site I gave earlier-

http://117027.successuniversity.com/new/

& sign up. Its helping me & thats my only aim (I was accuse of running a “get rich scam”)..

Far from it. Just check it out & you will see.

Peace & may God bless.

Hi, I have a therapist friend who goes to another therapist from time to time so there is nothing wrong if you are asking for help , you are a human at the end .
I’m much younger than you but this doesn’t mean we can’t help you , We can just inspire you . If you wanna chat with me I would love to . But please send me a shout here & I will give you my e-mail.

I think you are just feel only so are you married ?

It must be very hard to be a professional whose needs assistance yourself. Like you would tell any of your clients, there is no shame or harm in needing to talk or anything, and everybody needs support. You have clearly been let down a lot in the past. How old are your children? My mum is your age and I’m 22, and she’s my best friend, and we do talk about things like this, I guess its dependant upon how old your children are and the type of relationship you have with them. You appear to be moarning and focusing on the let downs and ‘bad decisions’ (everybody is guilty of those, and its from those that you learn) rather than positivity. You’ve made bad decisions, you wont be doing that again, what can you do to avoid that and meet people that will not let you down. What do you enjoy doing? People with similar interests. Equally have you considered your expectations of people. Not in a bad way, but I used to feel so let down all the time, and had very difficult relationships, and after as time, I realised that if my expectations of people changed, so did my relationship with them. I was expecting people to save me from how I felt, but its not up to any body else to do that. You are in control of your own happiness, although obviously you share that with those close to you, but they dont have the ultimate responsiblity to your happiness, that is down to you. Hope that makes sense. Dont want to make out like you’re doing anything wrong, as thats not what I’m saying, but maybe look deeper into the relationships you have had, andthe ones that have let you down the most, and learn from that with new experiences.. new people. Hope thats helps, but I think I might just be jabbering away!

Well, you may be a therapist, but you’re a human after all. You’re allowed to have downs too. You’re not paying for mistakes you did in a past life! hehe You should just think about what you’d say to your clients and listen to it! I’m pretty sure even therapists can make bad choices in life from time to time, but at least you have the knowledge of how you can change it since you’ve helped people with similar problems before, so just listen to yourself.

most of the time we can help everybody but ourselves isnt that funny :D , so my theory is somehow true :) …. so therapist, i always didnt like therapist somehow… so if u are asking why u posted this for the simple reason that u wanted to get it off ur shoulder ,, talking really helps …most ppl really dont want to get their problems solves they just want somebody to listen to them … i cant understand how could a 55 year old person needs somebody to hold on, while u must be the person everybody is holding on too cant you see ? ur kids needs you , they need you to hold them up when they fall ,i wonder how could you pick them up , if u want somebody to pick you up ?

minpin4 wrote:
I guess I was hoping for some wisdom from an elder…like in a tribe or something. What happened to the wisdom of elders?

The wisdom of the wisest elders is that the wisdom of the youngest children can be helpful in a time like this.

That’ll be $50.

Think of it this way: wouldn’t you tell a client that needing help is nothing to be ashamed of?
If you feel like you need the help, then get it. There’s no sense letting things build up - it’ll only make things worse. There’s also no sense trying to self-diagnose or self-treat. No one can be objective about themselves. You need that objectivity.
Although, at least you’ll be able to tell if your therapist is doing their job properly ;)

Support systems arnt just your family. talk ur problems thro with close friends there ususally the most understanding anyway as u probly hav a lot in common with them. Maybe u do have a support system in plain sight afterall

I am sorry for your pain, loosing your best friend and all, I suppose its normal for you to be having a tuff time now. I dont know why you would be worried about defending yourself, but I hope that all works out. Your daughters probably appreciate you not depending on them to make you feel better to a certian extent, but at the same time, as a daughter myself, when we see someone hurting and they wont talk to us, if feels like they dont trust us enough to help them. So be careful there. I hope you feel better by just venting, and I hope for you all goes well in the future.

minpin4 wrote:
Are you referring to an EAP? Egads…I am the EAP provider! I am in private practice…no “inside resources”. I guess what I need is a confidant…someone to talk to that I could trust. I don’t guess this is possible. Physician heal thyself! No help for the helper. I guess being alone is not the end of the world. It certainly prevents any BS from raining down on one’s head. I was accused of some pretty ugly stuff recently, after my best friend died last week. Can’t sleep well, and am dreaming of defending myself in a court of law, and also dreaming about pain meds and vomiting and stuff. Don’t know how to explain my life. I don’t seem to make any sense, I know.

When all else fails—talk to a total stranger and let out little bits of madness which have accumulated in your psyche and are slowly poisoning your soul. It’s easy to talk to a stranger, find perspective and proceed to the next item which might be bothering you, because a stranger normally will not judge you and if they do—who cares? ;)

From what you’ve said it sounds like you take a heavy spirituality into your practice or in your reflection of your life. Helping thoses you link with by delving into their perspective and mind will inevitably consume you. It sounds like you you’ve incorporated some shamanistic and empathetic practices I believe that if you find ways to channel and filter all this human behaviorial/psychological illness the mental fog and feelings of oppression will also dissapate. Your question I hope will lead you to finding a sounding board and enable you to retrace yours steps back into a more balanced perspective. We as humans are social creatures and suffer when removed from social practices.

If your fear is in being taken to be judged, by family, friends and peers—it would explain your feelings being translated into a court appearance. Perhaps you’ve been to court before or enjoy crimeTV—your mind can related or draw the parallels between the current events and past experiences. I won’t ask how your friend passed. The stress might contribute to feeling sick, or lack of food and sleeping medications—also lead to feeling sick. Don’t give up, your mind is trying to help, you have to work through the questions that your subcontious is posing in your sleep—once you do, you’ll sleep better. I hope that we can help. I hope you’ve rested well, breath deeply, love others and don’t forget to love yourself.

If all else fails go on vacation—whens the last time you’ve done that?

minpin4 wrote:
no…I never chat. Are you 17?

being the age of someone 17, i have to say that.. sometimes.. advise from someone younger can make you look at things differently than those who are your age and are on the same page as you… i understand that same conclusion to life… i must have done something horrible in a past life to end up where i have… and all the issues that i have to deal with as well… however…. you have to learn to use the bad as good… turn the bad around and make something out of them…

hehe Lil bit 17… ;)

I haven’t seen very many users over 50, a few in the mid to late 40’s perhaps. A lot of people, sad to say, in an age category you are referring to aren’t nearly as technologically savvy as you are.

Times’ *gone mad* wrote:
hehe Lil bit 17… ;)

I haven’t seen very many users over 50, a few in the mid to late 40’s perhaps. A lot of people, sad to say, in an age category you are referring to aren’t nearly as technologically savvy as you are.

well.. im not 40 or 50.. but i am 33.. lol.. i have actually had conversations with rocko.. and he is great in giving advise or just talking when i have an issue… i agree… some kids arent really mature enough to give any kind of advise.. but you would be surprised on those who are mature and able to see what someone else is dealing with…

I do not find it ironic at all that you need to talk to someone. We all need that sort of interaction to some level or another (even the most introverted of people). There are a plethora of folks here that will give their time to you, including me. I gave you a shout with info on how to get a hold of me outside of this site if you like.
Bright blessings ~ Richard

Ok I’d be considered more a peer than a sage. I’ll be 50 tomorrow. I too have managed to reach this age with no support system at all, except my 17 year old daughter. I too try not to lean on her but unfortunately cannot claim complete immunity. Ironically, one of the most difficult parts of raising a teen is not having someone to consult about it and obviously she wouldn’t be any help there. Fortunately she’s done quite well in spite of me. I used to be a social worker. It really is easier to help people other than ourselves because we’re able to remain somewhat objective. As far as that “past life”…I wonder about that myself. It hardly seems possible I could have created so much bad karma in this lifetime. I know people who should have karma far worse than mine that can leave their purse on the front seat of a running unlocked car for ten minutes, illegally parked, in the middle of downtown, with no repercussions. I’d come back to a purseless car hooked onto the back of a tow truck or stolen in a nanosecond. My point is that I don’t think we necessarily get what we deserve. On the bright side, you may be in a good postion for that next life. But, seriously, you are so likeable in your writing that I’m betting your lack of support isn’t due to the kind of person you are but the situations you’ve been in. Maybe it’s bad luck, maybe bad choices. Maybe it’s difficult to listen to other peoples problems all day and still have the energy to deal with your own. Another theory, based on “it keeps happening over and over” is that you are attracting or attracted to the same “types.” I don’t know. Without sounding too trite, it sounds like you need to vent. I’m sorry that I don’t have any great advice but I am happy to listen and commiserate.

Hi. I know you probably wont get this anytime soon from now (June 25, 08) but i read your excerpt and Im interested in everything. The reason why is because I’m 18 and going through that stage where i want answers to everything. I wan to know who I am. I want to know more about me. Not relative wise. Well let me explain a little better. I was told by 2 or 3 different therapists that i would make a good therapist. And honestly, i like the sound of it. But i heard from a friend about how therapist aren’t the most happiest people on earth because they think to much. They drive their partners up the wall. But i figured if its what you were meant to do then, oh well. Comes with the territory right? Thing is, Im with someone who means allot to me so i don’t know if its for me. I notice my mind frame is slightly different from others my age and well, i don’t know. If you could email me and i can just be your email buddy or your email confidant. Whatever you want to let off your chess. Even if your not looking for an advice i can be here. I can help you help me.

Respectfully,
Sherline

Michael Leibman wrote:

minpin4 wrote:
I guess I was hoping for some wisdom from an elder…like in a tribe or something. What happened to the wisdom of elders?

The wisdom of the wisest elders is that the wisdom of the youngest children can be helpful in a time like this.

That’ll be $50.

hahahahaha!!