Love help: Cancer in the Family…About a year and a half ago, when I was 18 I adopted my cousin when her mother died of cancer. - Help.com

I am sorry to hear about your loss and I want to praise for the adopting your cousins. You will feel highly anxious for ‘Jane’ considering what happened to her Mother and Brother. The one thing you can count on is your experience. You will know when your child is sick and your are the best ‘doctor’ for ‘Jane’ because you know her. So, anything you are worried about get it checked out. That is all you do.

Wow! You certainly are a strong, brave and caring soul. Sometimes, talking to a geneticist would help. Do you remember the name of the oncologist who worked with ‘John’? Perhaps their office could hook you up with someone.

I don’t know how things work where you are. Ideally you need more than just a doctor, who will just examine her externally every so often. Is there any way of arranging private medical scans for her periodically? I know that here in the UK, for example, you can take private medical cover where you pay a fixed monthly sum. This can cover for things like scans and check-ups if you want to ensure peace of mind.

If you cannot afford this (which is understandable because you are so young), then explain your concerns to your doctor, who may be able to refer her to the hospital for regular scans/ check-ups every so often.

Other than that, if you follow a faith, then prayer can be exceptionally helpful.

I hope that this is of some use. You’re an amazing person to have taken on such a huge responsibility at such a young age. My prayers are with you and ‘Jane’ and I wish you the very best of luck for the future.

Farah :)