boyfriend help: how can i learn to communicate with my boyfriend better? - Help.com

Why do you shut down and not talk?

when you’re at home think what you’ll tell him and study that.
You should be more specific, tell me what you can’t tell him

i do study and think about what i shouldtell him, but when he is sitting infront f me i cant. i mubble and choke up and nothing comes out the way i plan and i end up just saying f’it.

i wanna tell him, that he needs to understand we are ocmpletely opposites. he loves to party becuz he is very open and friendly.

im very quiet therefore the party scene isnt for me.

also i push hoim away alot because i’m very scred of letting somone car about me. and when i do all i want him to do is come after me and just tell me he’s here to stay but instead he just says fine whatever, if your gonna be stupid i dont want to hang out with you or whatever.

I’m mostly extremely quiet and noncommunicative.

One day I played the piano and sang, alone. Then my sister called, and, after our conversation, I thought back and noticed I had communicated very directly and effectively, obviously because I had already moved past the basics of using my voice and hearing it.

This was a good thing, because she had called because she was sick with a really high fever, and scared.

So, basically, if I was you, I’d play the piano and sing for 3 hours before each little conversation with your boyfriend :) I’m trying to help a little.

you are, i seem to not beable to get over opening up to him. wen i should. he told me he loved me.

i fee weird because i should feel confortable around him and beable to tell him anything good and bad and not worry bout the reaction.

im so frusterated because right now we are not speaking to eachother and the last thing he said to me was, i need to figure out if i want to be with him. lately i hvae been pushing him away and i know what i need to say to him, but i never have been able to talk to him because we have poor communication.

I had sort of a girlfriend this past year or two, who I felt I couldn’t communicate with, and I thought I was making myself clear that I really needed to talk with her about some things, but I didn’t know how to…and I just couldn’t get a word in, she’s so outgoing.

Finally I wrote her an e-mail, a thank you letter. It didn’t address any of the things I meant to talk about, but it was a very long list of thanking her for every positive thing and quality I’d experienced or known about her. She really liked the letter, even though it was written more in the spirit of ” I’m practicing talking to you ” rather than ” I love you forever ” … and then I noticed it was much easier to converse the next few times we talked.

So that’s my #2 suggestion, write a letter :)