Love help: I have a problem.

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I have a problem.

Obviously. Otherwise I wouldn’t be posting, right? Well. I’m in love with my best friend. It sounds cliche and ridiculous. But we’re not. We’re really not. He’s from a different world than I am. I used to have a lot of friends. I don’t know if I do anymore. And he, well, he’s perfect. Star of the show, good at every sport ever invented, and so smart. Everyone loves him. We talk almost every day. When I feel ugly or useless he’s there. But now he’s with this girl. She’s beautiful. Younger. But beautiful. She’s athletic, but she’s kind of bland I think. You know, just bland, personality-wise. I didn’t mean to fall for him. I know that I shouldn’t have. But he’s the only person that makes me feel like I want to see what happens tomorrow. It didn’t really bug me at first when he started going with this new chick. But I think he’s falling for her, like for real. The way he looks at her, that’s what get me. I don’t know. I can’t really function thinking that if he had to choose between her and me, he might pick her. And I can’t talk to him about it, because I don’t want to lose him altogether. I mean, I just feel so hopeless next to her. Like, I invested all of myself into him, and now, I don’t know, there’s nothing left. I don’t have the strength to try again with someone else. To fall again with someone else. To fail again with someone else. I just, I don’t want to leave my house. I don’t feel like anyone looks at me as a girl, just a person. Is that awfully anti-feminist? I just. I don’t know. I really am in love with him, maybe. Isn’t that pathetic. Sorry.

This open post was written 9 months, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 147, 9, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.

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star, friends, Feminism, Love, sport, Binomial coefficient, house, girl, Person, Sound (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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Geek10 #
US | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (6 minutes after post)

Yeah, what is this? Everyone has f’ing problems, what is this… help.com?! That would be retarded!

As for the whole love with best friend,
first thing to ask yourself is: is your love just growing BECAUSE you feel like you’re losing him, is it a best friend thing or really a love thing?
If its just a best friend thing well… depending on the type of girl that is you might lose him as a best friend for sure . . .
If its a really love thing you can talk to him about it but I wouldn’t be sure of where it would lead to either. . .
Your choice! Your actions!
*runs*

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Anonymous #
9 months, 2 weeks ago (8 minutes after post)

dude.
that was really well written.
goodluck.

xjustme 0 #
Centereach, NY, US | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (11 minutes after post)

gee, thanks.

lolo #
Albuquerque, NM, US | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (23 minutes after post)

if you really love him, then try to be happy for him. If he seems really happy with this other girl then you should feel happy too, not in the way you would like, but happy because you get to see him smile. Continue to be there for him. Love is always worth the wait, even if there is a chance it might never happen. You can atleast still be his friend at the end of it all.

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xjustme 0 #
Centereach, NY, US | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (27 minutes after post)

Thank you. That’s what I decided to do, until I saw him look at her. I’ve become an immobile mess. I haven’t left my house in a long time, and my grades are suffering. I can’t seem to think about anything else. I can’t even be in the same room with both of them. I know I should be happy for him. And I am. But at the same time, I can’t help but think its hopeless when I’m in love with someone, who so obviously doesn’t care about me in nearly the same way. Maybe its just dumb to expect that anyone ever could care about me that way. I don’t know. Thanks though.

lolo #
Albuquerque, NM, US | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (36 minutes after post)

why don’t you try going back and spending some time with your old friends. Not to replace him, but just so that he is not your only option when you want to hangout with someone. Because when you do hang out with him she will probably be there, and that would defeat most of the piont. when it gets better (which it will eventually)finding yourself stuck in a social rut with no friends will be a tuff problem to fix. trust me. Also, good friends are the best way to get him off of your mind, if only for a few hours or so.

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xjustme 0 #
Centereach, NY, US | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (38 minutes after post)

I guess I’ve been so close to the problem and just being stuck in this little web of self-pity that I didn’t really think about it that way. I’ll try. Thanks. I didn’t really expect this to work, you know. I figured maybe I’d get to rant a little bit. I didn’t really think that I’d find a solution. Thank you. :) :)

shimmydyla #
US | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (10 hours, 44 minutes after post)

im in the samesituation i have no idea waht to say… just try to stay there best friend and if it works it works i just try to survive it and remember she’ll always be my best friend

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x-amy 1 #
AU | 9 months, 2 weeks ago (18 hours, 54 minutes after post)

ALL I CAN SAY IS: GOOD LUCK :D
I also was in the same situation few years ago and now we both know that we are better off friends then Lovers! But it doesnt mean thats what you and your friends situation will be like. The thing with this situation is that there are soooo many diffrent outcomes and some can be really hurt full so good luck :)

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