friends help: so i found this guy who’s absolutely perfect. - Help.com

This sounds tough.

Here’s what you do:

tomorrow, approach him nicely. Tell him that you don’t appreciate (in a nice way) how he’s been overprotective (use a different word, such as too cautious), and you think that it would be great to be just friends. Explain how you think he’s nice, kind, etc. and don’t hurt his feelings, just let him know how you feel. Don’t let anything stop you, girl! Just go for it! Follow your feelings. I think it’s great that you know he’s everything you wanted but you are so independent to admit you don’t like him. That takes guts.

Good luck!

if you felt an instant connection than he is “the one” for you.. however you say your trying to force yourself to like him which is bad

1: You Cannot Force Love
2: It will rebound
3: It might break him if you go out with him and rebound
4: (honestly) It sounds like your going to date him because he is soo nice

The best support I can give you is tell him in the best possible way that you only have friend interests. In honesty it won’t work out if you have to force yourself to like him… no matter how nice he is. However make sure you specify “good friend”, not just friends. He sounds like the type you would want as a best friend

I’m the type of guy who holds the door open for girls. But lately I’ve met one girl who simply said, “It’s sweet, but you need to stop doing that. It’s annoying.” So, taking it with a grain of salt, I’ve stopped. It’s not hard to change the way a guy acts around a girl. He probably thinks that what you want is protection, when really you don’t. So if you simply let him know how you feel about him, he may tone down a little.

well i think you should talk to him about what the issues in the relationship are, if hes too obsessive, tell him politely, but get the message through. And if you think he’s being to nice, chances are hes just too afraid that you’ll have issues accepting who he really is. If hes this concerned about your thoughts on him, I say give him a chance. Let him open up to you when hes comfortable, just let him be himself and decide if hes right for you.

Wow, I was a bit older than you (about 20, two years ago) but I experienced a very similar situation. The guy was a few years older, we hit it off in soooooo many ways, and literally talked for hours on end. We had certain connections in our faith, morals, backgrounds, etc that were dead on and made us feel very close to one another. So close that we told each other everything, so close that we were there for each other no matter what, so close that we became best best friends. There was a bit of an attraction from me toward him, and he was greatly attracted to me. I was young, and thought this was enough. I did try to force myself a bit, I cared for him so much that I wanted to make myself care for him the way he did me, I even prayed for it! However of course, this didnt come. There HAS to be an attraction. They HAVE to give you goosebumps and butterflies in that sort of attraction way, rather than they are just so good to you that you want to force feelings that you dont have. This was my case anyway. Honestly, it went on for too long. 2 and a half years of on off with someone who truely cared for me, but I wasnt giving back as much as they were no matter how I tried, and that is simply unfair! However much you may miss him, however much it is GOING to hurt him (he’s obviously head over heels talking about marriage and all), you HAVE to let it all go. You have to tell him and be honest so that he can move on. If the situation were flipped, and you were in his shoes hurting so badly for a situation that just couldnt happen, youd eventually have to realize that the best thing is to move on, and thats exactly what he needs to do. By the way, you are young, you have much learning and growing to do (the both of you) so let it go and let it be. You never ever know what will happen 6 months or a few years on down the road. Whether it be a rekindled true love for you both, or someone knew in each of your lives that is exactly what you need.