If you are contemplating suicide, hurting yourself, or you are seriously depressed: please, seek professional help!
Call this hotline (1-800-273-8255) operated by our friends at the
Suicide Prevention Lifeline, anytime, for free, professional, and
confidential assistance. While other Help.com users are likely to reply
to your post, please make sure you understand that your use of Help.com
falls under our TOS.
Note: I’m a robot that the Help.com staff created. If this response is in error, I apologize, please ignore it.
Cool, that is really beautiful and has a lot of truth to it. Thanks for posting.
logout invited 18 users to read this post 1 year, 9 months ago.
well thats good then i guess lol.
logout changed the tags on this post: they were "star, sun, Silver, Dream, Adjara, Door, writing, Rain, faith, Cheering, faith, hope, poem, love, depression, help, poetry, thoughts" 1 year, 9 months ago.
What a great poem. Thanks you so much for sharing it Raver.
My favorite part is:
Have faith and find a shelter
For when it starts to rain.
Believe that when its over,
You’ll see the sun again.
Thanks. I found it the other day in my wardrobe. (theres all sorts of junk on the floor there lol)
I brought it when i was in an abusive relationship when i was younger. And i was taken to the shops one day. And i secretly brought it. Its just a piece of card with this on it. I was just trying to cheer myself up at the time. It has a lot of meaning, i wasnt aloud to buy my own things or spend my own money. So it means a lot. Its one of the positive things i can take from such a bad experience.
Maximina, glad you popped up here, saves me from clicking elsewhere to find you, wanted to add you as a friend.
Fizz I would be honored!
Raver you should check out the poem I posted a couple of months ago. I think you would like it. It has similar meaning for me. It is amazing the power words can have to inspire us to remember what is important in life!
You know RB and I hope you don’t mind me saying, you’ve really been through a lot, but I just have a strong feeling that you are going to be ok in the long run.
You have an inner strength in you.
Maximina :) wrote:
Fizz I would be honored!
I think I’ll be the one who’s honored, you seem so genuine, a trait I like very much.
Oh i do, its in there!
I’m a fighter. I get kicked down, but i do what i can to try and get better. I think of bad things occasionally, but i know that i need to find something more rational and helpful. I think you know what i’m talking about. But i wanna sort things out.
I am looking forward so much to having a car. Having my own house. Going to America.
Me and my bloke are saving up for all these things. I’ve been to America before and i want to take him there…i love it there. The people are so much different to England. They are actually sociable lol and friendly.
A year ago, i had no hopes or dreams for the future. Now i actually look forward to things.
When all the metaphors have let you down, that is exactly when a brand new metaphor is about to rise over the horizon of the ground of your being, to enlighten all the dark and dreary light-starved metaphors in your mind.
:)
I know. But its suprising how many of us are in a rainstorm.
My point is, there is no may or may not. The sun WILL come.
Negativity doesn’t get anyone anywhere…its something we find hardest to fight. And yet, through the fight. I have something that makes me smile.
That’s so funny, so often I think that people here in the U.S. and especially in the South, aren’t nearly as friendly and socialable as they used to be.
I think about how things have changed from when I was a kid, my Daddy waving to strangers and them waving back, but now if you wave they look at you like you are a total freak.
Maybe I am a total freak, but at least I’m for the most part a happy little freak.
I’m sorry you feel this way.
I am dam proud to be where i am right now.
And i didn’t get here by thinking i was doomed to be miserable.
I feel bad for you PomPom it seems you don’t have any hope! In order for the good to happen in your life you have to believe. You have to have hope.
Sometimes rainstorms lead to beautiful rainbows. Rainstorms can be wonderful. Great things can emerge from adversity.
PomPom wrote:
its all lies, you’ll spend your whole life waiting for the good part and the truth is for most of us, there is no such thing metaphorically speaking or otherwise
That is sad and really not true, there are millions of good parts if you just let them be.
Fizz wrote:
That’s so funny, so often I think that people here in the U.S. and especially in the South, aren’t nearly as friendly and socialable as they used to be.I think about how things have changed from when I was a kid, my Daddy waving to strangers and them waving back, but now if you wave they look at you like you are a total freak. Maybe I am a total freak, but at least I’m for the most part a happy little freak.
A happy freak is better then an unhappy freak.
I won’t pretend i know American people all that well, i just went on holiday for a few weeks and went to a few places. But even like, if i got on a bus…guys would give up their seat for me and my mom. And things like that. In england its like…guys would rather be shot than give you a seat.
I’m not like that though. I have my manners. I gave up my seat for some old ladies in the doctors surgery the other week. I may only be 18 but i can still be old fashioned if i want to lol.
Raver where did you spend your holiday in the U.S.?
Basic manners would make any place, a better place.
PomPom
2
#
GB | 1 year, 9 months ago (37 minutes after post)
Maximina :) wrote:
I feel bad for you PomPom it seems you don’t have any hope! In order for the good to happen in your life you have to believe. You have to have hope.
i lost my hope a long long time ago and i’ve even given up the fight, good for you if things are getting better Raver, but for most of us that just isn’t true and reading stuff like that gets me even more depressed because I know it wont be true, not for me at least I spose
Fizz wrote:
That’s so funny, so often I think that people here in the U.S. and especially in the South, aren’t nearly as friendly and socialable as they used to be.
I think about how things have changed from when I was a kid, my Daddy waving to strangers and them waving back, but now if you wave they look at you like you are a total freak.
the whole world has become unfriendly, its just the way things are, i’ve seen the world change over the years and it sure aint changing for the better
I think Pom Pom needs a group hug. Pom Pom life will never get better unless you have the courage to believe and fight for what you want. You can have a better life, but it starts with belief in yourself and the courage to have hope.
PomPom wrote:
stuff like that gets me even more depressed because I know it wont be true
That reminds me of a line of verse that can be taken several ways …
“nothing surpasses this, in the midst of misery to remember bliss”
If the whole world was unfriendly none of us would be at this post or even on this website!
If you look for the negative you will find it, you’ll be a much happier person if you look for the positive. Maybe that is harder to find, but it’s there if you search and are willing to see it.
It brightened my day ;) thanks
very beautiful raver… thank you for sharing…. it really does have a lot of meaning…
I tried to commit suicide last year. Last may. It would of worked had the empty bliser packs and bottles not been found. I knew what i wanted to achieve. And that was death. I took some pretty dangerous tablets. not just the usual painkillers. I also took stuff i knew i was allergic to.
But i’m here. I survived. Not without punishment. I can have amnesia about things. I can have problems concentrating at times. Among other minor things.
Look i’m not saying there are people worse off and you should be grateful.
But dammit i was THAT serious about wanting to die. And i can be happy now. My life is FAR from perfect. I would change a million things. But sometimes, like today for example,
i can sit back
look at all the sh!t.
And think, yep. I’m ok.
Things get better PomPom. Don’t accept depression. Fight it.
Starlight wrote:
It brightened my day ;) thanks
lil_bit_shi wrote:
very beautiful raver… thank you for sharing…. it really does have a lot of meaning…
Your very welcome :)
i remember, 17 years old sitting on my bed for a bit over a week.. with a knife next to me.. only moving to use the bathroom… i never ate or drank… just laid there, suffering in silence by myself… i was soooo ready to go… but then something came over me… and i started thinking about my daughter.. who was 1 1/2 at the time… and i couldnt do it… i struggle every day with depression… and yeah.. i take my happy pills… but there are still times.. in which i have an extreme melt down.. i will just start screaming in horror… wanting to just end it all… stop the suffering… even while taking my meds… it just seems like my life is sooo over whelming… and after about an hour of this meltdown.. its my children who i think about… and i stop being so suicidal… as i start thinking of how selfish it would be of me to take myself away from them… so i continue on with the pain of living every day… taking it day by day.. trying to get through it all… so until next time in which i melt down again… here i am… hiding behind all my smiles…
Happiness and goodness may seem to be wimps if they can be easily destroyed by any random bully of negativity and destruction, but as the sum of all our desires, ambitions, and solutions, they deserve respect.
RaverBarbie wrote:
But i’m here. I survived.
The world is a better place because you were not successful!
Maximina :) wrote:
RaverBarbie wrote:
But i’m here. I survived.
The world is a better place because you were not successful!
I couldn’t agree more.
Oh thankyou. That is such a nice thing to say.
It wasnt a cry for help. It was a serious attempt. But i felt great in the hospital.
I was so gobsmacked to find people not judging me. No one patronised me. No one made me feel like i was selfish or wasting their time. People who i didn’t know were so nice to me.
I feel like i don’t fit in anywhere i go. It was nice to be accepted for once.
I still have that problem now..but..and maybe i’m just having a good day. But i have to put up with so much right now, and i cant let myself get dragged down again.
If you can continue to have a positive attitude about life Raver, you will find that all the adveristy in your life will propel you to do great things! I can feel your strength and compassion transcend even through the virtual walls of help.
Well its true.
I mean today, i have had the usual hassle from my dad. He’s an alcholic and constantly verbally abusive. Sober and drunk.
It really gets to me but today, out of nothing he was trying to start an argument…i was like…ok shut up im not interested.
i fought with myself to keep myself upstairs and not go down and shout at him, as he was carrying on shouting at me to try and provoke me. So i just went in my room and put the tv on.
Usually i would get mad and depressed and frustrated. I’m just holding on to the positive feelings i’ve got right now. Hoping they will last. I feel like i can face anything right now.
My father was an alcholic. He quit drinking when I was about five. He use to do awful things to my older siblings. I am the youngest of eight. Becoming sober didn’t really help him become any nicer. He is still a complete a*s. As an adult he treats me better, because he knows if he pisses me off I will just tell him to f***** up and not talk to him. Growing up he was very verbally abusive and he still is to my mother. I understand how hard that is to deal with. We can either learn how to act from our parents or how not to act. His behavior is about him, not about you. Remember you will still have down days, but hang on to the hope. Remember you have been through so much and survived, so you can handle anything.
I love finding common ground to build on!
I’m the youngest of 6, with an alcoholic mother.
I know i can. It doesn’t make things easier though. But rather than wallowing in the pain i feel. I will try to occupy myself with other things. Or i make plans of what to say to certain people, or what to do. Which makes me feel better. I hate reacting a certain way and then thinking of what you wish you would have done. So i try to do that in advance. That way i get more or less the outcome i want or expect. And i am then either happy or not suprised.
My dad has been sober since last tuesday now. Wonder how long this one will last. The only reason he has stopped is because i told his counciller what he is really like. I have recorded some of our arguments. And made a note of his drinking and how much. And found out he had been lying to her. See, she’s my counciller too. So it helps her to help him in a way. Although she cant directly discuss what we say unless i give permission. He’s also only doing it because my boyfriend threatened him. Because he was completely drunk in front of my bfs daughter.
His daughter has an ‘alcoholic’ home. her moms a drunk. And he likes her comming here because she is away from that situation. But if he is going to be drunk then he’s not happy with her comming here.
Anyway, my dad feels intimidated by my boyfriend because he is a better role model. My brother even looks up to him rather than dad. And my boyfriend has the respect in this household. which drives my dad crazy. But respect is earned.
This reply has been removed.
Raver how long before you will be moving out? How old is your brother? It sounds like you have found some stability with you boyfriend.
Your boyfriend sounds like a loving father, I have great respect for that.
He’s 22. For that age i think he is brilliant. He puts her first which is important. He is a good dad.
He lives with me at my house. So i’m not alone. But because he is involved by living here, he gets angry with my dad. And my boyfriend is very macho etc and gets angry rather than annoyed. so i don’t want to discuss it with him every time something happens because i don’t want to wind him up either.
It is great not being so alone. Apart from when my boyfriend is at work we spend about 99% of our time together. which is very rare for a couple to do i think, suprisingly we don’t get on each others nerves.
I don’t think it will be until next year when i move out. Financially things arent great right now. And starting off is expensive! But we are saving and have managed to get enough for a deposit on a house. Just gotta work out enough for the monthly payments now.
My brothers 14. Doesnt seem to be affected very much by it. But he knows the situation. He’s quite naive still.
It sounds like you are headed in the right direction.:)
My husband is the greatest love of my life and I only wish I could say that we don’t get on one anothers nerves, lol.
You will be so much better off when you get out of that stress, but it won’t all be roses and sunshine, you’ll still have to deal with it, but you will.
I hate to be the barrier of bad news, but he is probably more effected then you know, he just deals with it different, it may hit him different when he’s older. I hope that he has a good portion of your strength and good sense.
Nice Raver,
It’s nice to know you always have tomorrow. You can start again, you have another shot.You can rest and try to get up again. You can change or a situation in life eventualy changes and life does renew itself in spite of you.
RaverBarbie wrote:
Well its true.
I mean today, i have had the usual hassle from my dad. He’s an alcholic and constantly verbally abusive. Sober and drunk.
It really gets to me but today, out of nothing he was trying to start an argument…i was like…ok shut up im not interested.
i fought with myself to keep myself upstairs and not go down and shout at him, as he was carrying on shouting at me to try and provoke me. So i just went in my room and put the tv on.
Usually i would get mad and depressed and frustrated. I’m just holding on to the positive feelings i’ve got right now. Hoping they will last. I feel like i can face anything right now.
that is totally awesome raver… and as hard as it was to stay upstairs… i bet if you find yourself in that same situation again… and you do it all over again… hopefully he will get the hint that he is just wasting his breath and stop.. eventually.. lots of hugs… love shie
Thanks a lot , I needed to read this poem :)
Fizz wrote:
My husband is the greatest love of my life and I only wish I could say that we don’t get on one anothers nerves, lol.
You will be so much better off when you get out of that stress, but it won’t all be roses and sunshine, you’ll still have to deal with it, but you will.
I hate to be the barrier of bad news, but he is probably more effected then you know, he just deals with it different, it may hit him different when he’s older. I hope that he has a good portion of your strength and good sense.
The thing is, he is treated differently to me. I’m not afraid to tell my dad to f*** off lol. I don’t stand for any crap, no matter who its from. My brother just keeps himself to hisself. My parents wrap my brother in cotton wool..its like this..
imagine, he’s seriously overweight, gets pocket money and brought all his clothes etc. He gets to do whatever he wants. If he does something wrong they are just like…nevermind.
Now when i was growing up i had literally pennies pockey money per week. I had to save up if i needed new clothes or shoes or something. I never had anything brought for me. If i did something wrong, i was told about it and punished. Grounded or sent to my room etc.
My brother gets golden treatment. He’s loving life right now. He’s pretty young and immature still. Not in a silly way, but you cant have a serious conversation with him really. Because he doesnt really understand.
So the different situation affects us differently.
lil_bit_shi wrote:
that is totally awesome raver… and as hard as it was to stay upstairs… i bet if you find yourself in that same situation again… and you do it all over again… hopefully he will get the hint that he is just wasting his breath and stop.. eventually.. lots of hugs… love shie
It is hard, i wanted to go shout at him and give him what he deserves…but i just let him carry on talking to himself. I just Put the tv on etc. Its REALLY hard sometimes.
Considerin he’s meant to be my dad, he is the biggest arsehole you will ever meet. Really, the things he says to people and the way he treats people is vile.
Hi there Raver Barbie,
Got around to it at last, been doing lots on the websites etc.
Well I like your post, it’s very possitive and it looks like you have managed to overcome most of what life can throw at you. You have my admiration for coping so well with it all.
There isn’t much more that I can say, I know I needn’t worry so much about you now. You strengths are awesome. I have the feeling you are going to get what you want and deserve from life.
RaverBarbie wrote:
lil_bit_shi wrote:
that is totally awesome raver… and as hard as it was to stay upstairs… i bet if you find yourself in that same situation again… and you do it all over again… hopefully he will get the hint that he is just wasting his breath and stop.. eventually.. lots of hugs… love shie
It is hard, i wanted to go shout at him and give him what he deserves…but i just let him carry on talking to himself. I just Put the tv on etc. Its REALLY hard sometimes.
Considerin he’s meant to be my dad, he is the biggest arsehole you will ever meet. Really, the things he says to people and the way he treats people is vile.
that is just sad… really… he should learn… to receive respect.. you have to give respect… i know its hard hun.. but maybe… just maybe.. if you do this often enough.. it will show him that you are done playing his little games..
This reply has been removed.
Thanks thep. I hope so.
And lilbit…i hope so too i really do. I don’t understand why he does it to me. When he didn’t have much of a problem when i was younger, he was never like it. He was amazing at everything. So talented and clever. And so nice. He was the best dad.
And since he has had this problem he has changed. Not just with the alcohol. Its when he is sober too now.
Thankyou BD, i cant believe someone who doesnt even know me would think that about me. I’m genuinly touched.
do you think it could have something with you growing up? are you the oldest child? sometimes a parent has a really hard time watching their child grow into an adult.. and may even act like this due to it..
Yeah theres just me and my brother and i’m just over 4years older than him.
I don’t know what it is, i don’t think it was too hard for them because i am very family orientated. I’ve not really ’strayed away’ from them. I still live at home. Still visit them etc.
I don’t know what it is. I know things are stressful like.
but if andy is living there.. then that is showing dad that you have another man in your life that is taking care of you… and he is maybe feeling lost.. like he has lost his right in taking care of his baby girl… maybe??
No its been going on a lot longer than that. Years before i even started having boyfriends.
oh…. ok.. hhmmm… maybe you should just confront him and tell him that you are sick of his attitude… or have you done that already… lol..
LOL every day…ugh..its a lose lose situation. All i can do is try and put up with it in a way that doesnt affect me in a bad way. Its difficult because i am a confrontational sort of person. And i am so into defending myself. Its just who i am, so i want to shout back all the time. But i don’t. It makes me so frustrated though.
you need to get yourself a great big pillow… and when it starts.. go to your room and put your face in it.. and scream to the top of your lungs… get your frustration out… see if that helps any.
Could be it’s about time for you to confront him with the issue, that now you are eighteen you are able to look after you self. That it is time for him to realize that your not his little girl any more but his grown up daughter. Then thank him for making you such a strong person. One that is able to know that you have the propper values in life. That he should be proud to have a daughter like you. That he and your mother helped to make you like you are.
But the thing is…they didn’t. Seeing them as i have grown up has caused me to want to be nothing like them. I don’t think i could live with myself if i turned out like them.
I do confront him. both in arguments and peacefully. my mom has talked to him. my nan (his mom) has even picked up on it. and my nan and grandad on my moms side have too and have made comments.
his mom has told him off about it in the middle of a resturant because she thought it was so appauling.
AND STILL he doesnt see what he is doing?? that is kind of messed up… as for not wanting to be just like your parents… i know what you mean.. i am NOTHING like my parents.. and have chosen to be me…
We both know that Raver Barbie. How do you turn some one around from doing bad to doing good? I dont suppose there is an answer, unless he looks for the truth.
Even if he finds it he will make it fit to suit him.
Tam, i know..thats why i make all these posts. I dont want to seem ungrateful when people suggest all these things its just so many things havent worked.
maybe you need to record him… either by video or by cassette.. and after having him recorded.. allow it to play very loud.. so that he can not deny what he is doing.. maybe it just takes him listening to himself to notice that maybe he has a problem..
and do this several times.. until he gets the idea ..
Firstly, I liked that poem - thanks for sharing it. Sometimes when a door closes I just take a few steps back and then smash it down. It’s a great way to get through doors. Of course, while keeping up with the metaphor, most times I have to find a way to fix the broken door once I’ve found what I’m looking for. But more often then not, it’s worth it.
Secondly, my eyes are spinning when I scroll up and down to figure out what the rest of the story is here on this post. I do like Thep’s last response though. But I hear what you’re saying about confrontations and “peaceful chats” not making much of a difference. Sometimes, that just won’t help.
I would never encourage someone to give up hope. Ever. I would never tell someone that nothing can be done to make them happier. Because I believe there is always a way. Sometimes, though, the only way to get towards happiness is by being ready to accept that a part of the issue may never change. Man, I am not making sense.
Let me try to explain. I had a friend while I was in high school who lied to me and convinced me that she was suffering from a terminal illness. Okay, for 4 long years I battled this “illness” together with her and was there ready to do anything and everything she needed. I mean, seriously, what WOULDN’T you do for a friend in that situation? To make a long story short, from the moment I found out that it was all BS, all I wanted was for her to tell me that. Just tell me that she lied. I just needed her to tell me that so I could move on. But she didn’t and with help, I managed to stop talking to her and to have nothign to do with her. It was the only healthy thing to do. And now, years later, I still wait for her to just tell me that she lied. Recently, someone I spoke to told me that I need to be ready to accept that she may never tell me that. I need to grab a hold of my life and be prepared to make the changes for my happiness by myself without expecting her to ever come clean.
I think that an attitude like that is incredibly hard to maintain. I don’t think it’s fair and I don’t want to do it. But I know that I have to.
I’m thinking it’s the same for you.
You want him to change. You know that you are right and there are so many ways to prove it but it isn’t changing anything.
Is it possible to accept that while it may happen one day, it also may not? We can’t change other people - we can only work on ourselves. Is there any way that accepting that might help you move on?
It will still hurt. He is still wrong. You are still right. But for now, maybe that’s what just has to be. Maybe tackling it directly isn’t the best option - for NOW. It’s a thought…
I may be way off base and I have definately rambled on for too long :)
Your father is never going to change the way he is, unless he wants to. No matter who does or says anything to him. he will do what he is doing now, because thats what he wants to do and be.
You dont have to like it, you do however have to accept it, I know you try to but you cant because you know that what he does is wrong. When you are able to escape from it, which one day you will need to do. You will have the opportunity to look at it from another angle. Then you can figure out if it is possible to do anything to help him. All you can do from then on in is to get him to accept how ill and sick he realy is.
No its right. Its what i’m trying to do!
My counciller said to me about a month or two ago. “you cant change other people. You an only change the way you deal with the person”
I know i have to accept it, its what i’ve been trying to do all these months.
But accepting something doesnt mean its not hard. Accepting the situation means living with it and not reacting. The things he says…
lilbit i have thought about recording him. I have made the record sound option on my phone a shortcut. I just have to press one button and it records straight away until i press stop. But so far i have been to busy with arguing and being shouted at to think about it. I keep forgetting. I think about it every time and regret it.
Thank You for sharing ,It is inspiring !
There looks to be only one answer left for the time being, it will be hard for you but I think you could survive it. It is something I dont like to advise but here goes.
Ignorance is bliss, completely ignor him, have nothing at all to do with him. If he ever asks why you do this just say “when you respect me and the rest of the family, I will respect you.” Then walk away.
I already did that thep…i do appreciate your answer. But it doesnt work like that perfectly.
sounds like you just have to move… end it all… before you will be completely happy.. and once you do.. you will see that a major part of your depression will end…
Then there is no answer, you are stuck in an impossible situation until you move away from it.
Sorry I’m so late to the post… that was a beautiful thought RB. I’ve not read all the thread, so I’m not sure how off topic it is… since it’s the popular post I imagine it’s gone way off topic by now :)…. anyway, thank you for posting a wonderful and true thought - I’m sure they are words that will reach and touch many.
Bright blessings ~ Richard
Hey Rich.
Its not necessarily off topic. Its about coping skills and bad home life, that kind of thing.
Lil/thep - i know i am planning to. But it is something i have to plan, its not something i can just do. We can afford the deposit etc. But our monthly income isnt enough for anywhere. So were both thinking of different job options right now. We have a few ideas. Andy has his driving test booked for april. So we will have more options then.
ok… I read the thread :) and I have to say I’m impressed. First with all the strength written within the post, and second this got to popular status and it’s not a silly meaningless post (most popular posts are in my opinion).
There is one thing I would like to add regarding your poem; I hope you don’t mind. It’s an old familiar saying, “When one door closes, another is opened”. I believe this saying to be true, BUT often another door presents itself BEFORE the old door closes. More often then not, this is what happens to us, we take the new opportunity and the old door remains open. We will go through our entire life wandering through this great big mansion from door to door and all the monsters from past rooms just follow us. It is just as important to close the doors as it is to see the new doors before us. Sunshinebaby speaks to this with the story of the lying friend. A door never closed lets things follows us for a very long time; sometimes forever.
I’ll let that metaphor simmer in your spirit :)
Bright blessings ~ Richard
Thankyou Richard. And thankyou for taking the time to read it all. That is very nice of you.
I do believe what you have said is true. “another stands ajar!”
Anonymous
#
1 year, 9 months ago (2 days, 6 hours after post)
Hey! i just joined this site… and i have been going through a really really hard time. This made me think, and gave me a little hope. Thank you so much for sharing! I think i am going to write it on a card to and carry it. Just to remind me of hope thorugh out my day :)
Thats brilliant :)
I am glad you found something good in it :)
Isn’t that awesome Ravor, you inspired someone to take another step forward and remind them, life can continue, no matter.
Yeah it is :)
Its nice to share things. Things can sometimes look grim. But there is always something that can make us feel better.
That is beautiful. I cant tell you how much I want to believe that is true
Well thank you for that poem! It made me feel better when all I was feeling at the time was despair.
Also RaverBarbie you seem to be doing what you need to be doing to work through problems and become a better person.
I also had an alcoholic father who was mentally abusive so please don’t listen to him when he gets that way. If you ever need to talk to someone about that situation or anything else please feel free to contact me.
You need to get out of his house… but you already know this.
And if you and the bf ever do make it back here to the States I would love to show you both around San Diego… it is very nice here!=)
RB when you do move out it will get better, because if you see him and he starts in on you, you can just get up and leave!
Darkoath…i would love that. There is no if though…just ‘when’. I definately want to come back for a while..i love it too much hehe! So i will take you up on that offer.
DO/Fizz…i know i have to move out. Its just so impractical and i financially cant do it yet. But am working towards it!
Dads been a bit…’better’ the last few days since the massive bust up we had in the week. to cut a long story short, i completely flipped at him. Plus i have been recording him being a ****…and i played it to my mom. And his counciller has give him several books to read whilst he isn’t with her. And he has actually been reading them.
So i dont know if its been better because he’s too busy reading a book or if it is actually working. I don’t trust him. So i haven’t got my hopes up.
It will happen when your able RB!
logout closed this post.
This post has been closed, no more replies. Thanks!
HelpBot
Maximina
Michael Leibman
Starlight
~Shie~
nextstar
sunshinebaby
Goodfella
Richard Cor de Lyon
'Bell
Darkoath