life help: my boyfriend threatened to kill me as I said something stupid, - Help.com

do you feel unsafe?

I did at first, but he doesnt live with me so that avoids some of the dramas. I think he was speaking out of anger. But he wont back off, he rang again today to ask to see his child and then went on again bout how its all my fault.

first of all it isnt your fault, Getting a restraining order could be a good idea if he keeps threating your life and causing you pain.

But then it will be on my head if he is removed from the country. I have my child to think about too. Im very confused!

listen if you feel unsafe then take out a restraining order if not then let it be the way it is but always think of your kids and if you feel that you are not with him and that you don’t care to be with him then you have to let that be very clear and be careful not to send mix singals as far as anyone one saying thing about how you treat your kids well thats a whole other story just be the best parent to your children action speak louder then words be careful when a man threatens to kill someone there must be a report because its the only thing that will be able to help you in case something does happen you do want to see your kids grow up and you don’t want to live in fear talk to a family member someone you can trust let someone in your family know whats happening and always carry a cell and speak to your child make sure that they understand that they are to keep away from this guy sometimes people can be sick in the head and since they can get to you they sometimes go after the ones you love the most best of luck and keep safe you and your children are in my prayers god bless

I agree with aracelis

His actions are the cause for his being removed from the country Kristyv, not yours. Your actions are creating safety for your family. Good luck following through sister…

yes take it father…i suffered abues of all kinds at the hands of my father, because he had problems with my mother. it may be just me but i already don’t trust him…take it further i don’t want anyone to feel the pain that i have

Wow , he threatened to kill you ? Take it further then .

If hes doing what hes doing , hes not mentally stable , you can overreact a bit when something you dont want happens , but youve always got to control yourself , he passed the limits .

another thing that comes to mind is that you mentioned he wasn’t from this country you have to realize that his true colors are comin out and he may not realize that while it may be “okay” in His homeland, it isn’t right here to treat women or ANYONE the way that he sees as being “okay”.

you should document this stuff and take it to a lawyer, if he’s playing games with your family by calling them up and involving you, even out of anger… it says alot about him, and it’s best to see to this now, then to perhaps try to find your child in his country… ( been known to happen) and because us women don’t have the heart to stand up for ourselves and voice what is wrong is wrong, and what is right is right. He’s a bully and you need to put him in his place, but have a lawyer help you.

I know lots of guys from the south america / middle america . Latinos tend to be very “macho” , acting though as women were slaves :P ,my auntie married one , while he was doing nothing , she was working , looking after kids etc . If she wanted to go out with friends he didnt let her , because he thought she would be cheating him , yet he himself was cheating her …

Judge the tone hes threatening you , did he only threaten you once ? Maybe he was just desperate , trying the last thing he could think of . Nonethenless , still most people would never do such a thing . If you cant choose what to do ,first try to see , and ask other people who know him in real life , what they think , what tone he said it in , judge it all , if even after that your not sure whether to take it sure , and its 50% take it further , 50% not take it further , then dont take any chances , and take it further. Remember , a normal person wouldnt do what he does in his situation .

Don’t risk it. Take out a restraining order.

The best way for you to shield your children from this, is to get away from this man anyway that you can. Situations like this effect children, even if you think that you are doing your best to protect them.

Don’t worry about him, he is an abusive jerk, worry about the safety and welfare of your children.

Just because someone else thought what you said was stupid doesn’t mean that it was. It bothers me that you automatically think it was, probably because this abusive man has you thinking you aren’t worthwhile, but the fact of the matter is, you are a worthwhile human being and your children need you.

You need to love yourself!

kristyiv wrote:
But then it will be on my head if he is removed from the country. I have my child to think about too. Im very confused!

Hello, I’m sorry, for writing this so late after 4 years. But I will tell you my mothers story, she divorced my father, he threatened her, then my mother gotten a restraining order on him. But it came with visiting rights so he can see us whenever he wanted. So since you were worried about the restraining order, it’s a good idea to do so. It’s no joke when it comes to your life.