Week help: I was in church last week and I flatulated so loud that I’m afraid to go back.

elmer

I was in church last week and I flatulated so loud that I’m afraid to go back.

Tomorrow is Sunday and I can’t possibly face the same people again. Everyone looked at me and they know me. It was an accident, but I have been having more and more of these lately. I don’t know what to do. Should I just go in and face them? The only other church is 10 miles away.

This open post was written 1 year, 9 months ago | V/U/S: 389, 22, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post elmer may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. elmer is not a verified member, has been around for 1 year, 9 months and has 3 posts and 12 replies to their name.

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Week, Sunday, Church, face, Tomorrow, Accident, Miles, Loud, afraid, Miles Away (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (22)

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Commander Ikari 81 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (1 minute after post)

A major tenet of most religion is forgiveness, and turning the other cheek, so why are you afraid?

Help me with: I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)

elmer #
Piscataway, NJ, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (3 minutes after post)

I’m afraid that when i turn the other cheek I will blast another.

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bnath0 0 #
Dallas, TX, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (3 minutes after post)

HAHAHAHHAHA

Help me with: A glass cup vs a disposable paper cup - Which causes less harm to the enviroment?

Commander Ikari 81 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (4 minutes after post)

ahhh, well thats why you play the anal organ before you go to church

Help me with: I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)

bnath0 0 #
Dallas, TX, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (7 minutes after post)

Seriously how old are you? I wouldn’t show any shame and go in with dignity. If anyone makes fun of you sarcastically just laugh with them. If theyre making fun of you to put you down tell them of by saying something like everyone farts - get over it. But for the future learn how to flex so that you can stop your self from farting.

Help me with: A glass cup vs a disposable paper cup - Which causes less harm to the enviroment?

elmer #
Piscataway, NJ, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (9 minutes after post)

do you think i should stay away from my fiance’s baked bean soup? she intimidates me and forces me to eat large quantities right before church. i don’t want to do it any more. help

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ÑÌnJÅ_ 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (10 minutes after post)

hehehe.:) church is the best place to let it rip , have a laugh about it.

Help me with: I dunno how to ask this but yet again i need help with my relationship.

Commander Ikari 81 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (11 minutes after post)

just use beano

Help me with: I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)

elmer #
Piscataway, NJ, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (13 minutes after post)

i think you are on to something. it does make me laugh some times… i’m going to just let it go. what the heck. they usually don’t smell, but on rare ocaision, they stain my pants. that is a little scary. i’m still a little embarrassed about the church goers.

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bnath0 0 #
Dallas, TX, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (14 minutes after post)

Your gf/wife is probably just as embarassed as you are … she wont make you eat beans anymore

Help me with: A glass cup vs a disposable paper cup - Which causes less harm to the enviroment?

elmer #
Piscataway, NJ, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (16 minutes after post)

you don’t know her. she is very persistant.. Do you think she wants to embarass me on purpose? I would hate to think such a thing. She is a good person, but i’m confused. ooops.. just let another one go. The dog flew off my bed when i let it go.

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ÑÌnJÅ_ 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (17 minutes after post)

smelly ones are the worst, i can see that would be embarassing, ive been having gas problems for the past few days and cant leave the house cause i am a fraid i will let one slip and it will smell ,all u can do really is hold those ones in until u get to a toilet.

Help me with: I dunno how to ask this but yet again i need help with my relationship.

ÑÌnJÅ_ 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (19 minutes after post)

I can help but laugh, but i dont think she is feeding u beans on purpose so u let one rip

Help me with: I dunno how to ask this but yet again i need help with my relationship.

elmer #
Piscataway, NJ, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (20 minutes after post)

Remember, the sphincter is the strongest muscle in the body. So they say, but mine isn’t. I also had an accident in the supermarket the other day. two people heard me and turned around and walked away. i tried to blame it on my daugher, but she also was repulsed by me. she made matters worse by yelling “ewe dad, you smell like a baboons but”… i think she hates me.

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ÑÌnJÅ_ 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (27 minutes after post)

You could change your diet , that might help you stop farting alot

Help me with: I dunno how to ask this but yet again i need help with my relationship.

Mezz 1 #
Longreach, 04, AU | 1 year, 9 months ago (38 minutes after post)

elmer wrote:
I’m afraid that when i turn the other cheek I will blast another.

Hahahahahaha ! Elmer ur so funny !! My face is hurting from laughing.

Help me with: Can you read this ?

elmer #
Piscataway, NJ, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (46 minutes after post)

Elmer knows best. Stick with me Mezz.

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Marni 0 #
Ferndale, FL, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (12 hours, 11 minutes after post)

Elmer you seem to be a quite funny guy. I suggest you go to church from now on, after hoovering your bean soup, and let em’ rip! I flatulate often, and it is such a breathe of fresh air! maybe the church goers will think so too. Give it a try and let me know how it works!

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Sans 57 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (12 hours, 51 minutes after post)

the only reason not to go back, as far as the fart is concerned, is if you think the air still hasn’t cleared yet!

Marni 0 #
Ferndale, FL, US | 1 year, 9 months ago (12 hours, 53 minutes after post)

not funny. i was thinking of botteling it and using it for defence

Help me with: Barack H Obama… next president of the US?

ÑÌnJÅ_ 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 9 months ago (22 hours, 4 minutes after post)

This post has to make everyone laugh

Help me with: I dunno how to ask this but yet again i need help with my relationship.

nikki_phi #
An Unknown Location | 1 year ago (8 months, 2 weeks after post)

that was brill!ha!ha!

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Week help: I was in church last week and I flatulated so loud that I’m afraid to go back. - Help.com

I was in church last week and I flatulated so loud that I’m afraid to go back.

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