friends help: I half to go to this party tonight,but i am realy shy.The only - Help.com

Be yourself. All you have to do is start a conversation, even small talk, and watch the conversation grow. Even with the past, chances are, no one even remembers you for that. So just be yourself, and if you act confident, people see you that way.

Get over it! I know it’s hard but you will decide what people think of you. If you are scared to death that someone will remember something then make up your mind that you will deal with it. Otherwise have a blast. Have your husband start a conversation that you can easily pick up on. Don’t be defensive but if someone brings it up say something like, yeah, that was a pretty rough night, but I’m having such a good time tonight. good luck…..and let your husband know how you feel, so he can have your back…….Shakey

Surprise him! If he knows you may be worried, be super confident, that will probably get his attention and draw some admiration.

Also carry a big stick…..lol

Don’t forget your deep breaths if you start feeling anxious, slow deep breaths.

your welcome, and I know what it’s like to sit in front of someone you dont know, it is very therapeutic for us to give advice (even if it is silly at times)please come back more often, people can relate to you, I know I can

Know that everyone else there is shy, especially the loudest ones. The best way to get over it is to introduce yourself to someone else who is struggling.

In the short term, for the party.

People love to talk about themselves.

So, ask them a starter question like:

Wow, spring alays makes me start thinking about vacation.What vacation plans do you have coming up this summer?
or
Can you believe the price of gas? What kind of car do you drive? HAS it been getting good mileage?
or
You know, on the way here we heard “name music song or title” Have you heard of them ( or do youremember them?)Have you been to any good concerts lately?

Ask something that they cannot answer yes or no. Then listen very carefully to their answers and ask them to elaborate. For example they say: A Ford Mazda– it gets aroun 14 mpg. Then say, what year is that?

I have a friend who is an extreme introvert, and that is what he does all through parties. Just interviews people, essentially. And everyone thinks he’s a great socializer. It took us several parties to realize that he knew a lot about us but we knew very little about him.

Also, complement them on something that you genuinely like about them. It always warms people up to talking to you.

And as far as long term,

A therapist just may be able to help you with your self-esteem, you just need to find a therapist who (if you don’t like the cost) works on a lsiding scale and who adheres to principles of realisty therapy (since you want them to not psychoanalyze and to move you forward).

http://wglasser.com/index.php?option=…

Therapists are like every other service– you need to shop around to find someone who is right for you.