friends help: All my life i have been lorried around to different houses - Help.com



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All my life i have been lorried around to different

houses but am currently living with grandparents, my parents split up when i was young due to domestic violence and since then my brothers and sister have been born by a differnt man who has recently broken up with my mum. my mum has just got a new boyfriend who has six children of his own! now i was lucky as over the past two years i have been living all over the place such as my ex boyfriends house, my mums and my ex step dad due to more domestics at my grandparents house.but recently i’ve come back to live here, but the violence is getting worse. i’m studying to do my A-levels currently, but i can’t study anywhere, i get blamed for alot of the argements around the house and the violence is getting worse. I can’t afford to pay rent anymore and i’m always at either work or studying or helping solve problems. i feel like it’s always my fault! I don’t know where to go what to do! But i really don’t want to tell anyone… not even my friends

This open post was written 4 months, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 114, 2, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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friends, house, Violence, boyfriend, Parent, Grandparent, study, Mum, Domestic, rent (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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rebeccalynn16 offline Verified User (4 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 months, 2 weeks ago (32 minutes after post)

I can understand you not wanting to tell anyone. Most people don’t understand what you are going through. and the people that do will not be able to help you. take it from someone that learned this the hard way. the reason you feel like it is always your fault is because that is the way emotional abuse works. the person telling you that it is your fault doesn’t want to take the blame and this is naturally why it is your fault. trust me when you didn’t live there they had the same problem with the same issues and it was still your fault. =:) it is anyone’s fault that will take the blame. if you type emotional abuse in to the search under world wide web it will pull up exactly how they are treating you. I know you don’t have the money to move out.. but if you find the opportunity for a way out take it. If you can make the opportunity happen. trust me I lived with someone that did this to me for at lest 23 years and it caused irreversible damage because I always took the blame for everything.

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ChicagoGirl offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 4 #
Chicago, IL, US | 4 months, 2 weeks ago (12 hours, 53 minutes after post)

A-levels: go to the library. Study there.

Blamed for a lot of arguments/violence: library. It’ll help keep you out of the way of most of the stuff.

Rent: Are you 18? Do you pay the rent for everyone? if yes, then quit, and move out. If you are the one who works and pays the rent, they are in your house, and you have the right to demand that they shut up or get out. If you are not paying the rent for everyone, then it might be time for you to look around for cheap housing. Your commuting time might get a lot longer, but you will be in a better situation. If you are not 18, then I’m afraid that you have to bear with it until you turn 18, and gain your freedom.

Other people’s problems: you could always try quitting that job. They’ll probably work it out on their own eventually, but in either case if you try to solve their problems for them, they’ll just keep happening -whether financial, or emotional. And- they’ll blame you for it.

It’s not your fault. It’s not your life choices. However, your life is your own- and you have to make a choice to get out of your situation no matter what, or live with it and accept it. Getting out will be hard, but you will be free. Living with it will mean you don’t have to take the responsibility of getting out of there- but you will have to accept the arguments and violence. Make the choice and follow through.

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