Year help: Heartbreak is horrible! - Help.com

Did you suggest splitting up, or was it a mutual agreement or what? Why did you think it was what you wanted?? Maybe it still is… but yes, the hardest part is after you do it, and you sort of panic because suddenly you feel like you MISS them too much… not hearing from them or anything. It’s hard to let go of someone who has been part of your days for some time. If there’s some very good reason for you to split up, though, or if you both agree that you should, I suggest you be prepared to work through some difficult days of missing him for awhile, till you are able to develop a new routine that he is not part of anymore. It’s not easy to get over someone we’ve cared for and shared with, no matter who does the breaking up!! It takes time to “mourn” the loss, and then get the strength to move on without them to something new.

First heartbreak really sucks. I’m sorry you are suffering. There are alot of great resources out there to help people through break ups, but really, it’s just grief.

Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance are the 5 stages of grief.
So it goes something like this, “I can’t beleive he’s done this to me! He cannot be gone!” Then, “Screw him then, bloody wanker!” then, “well maybe if I just do this or that then he’ll come back” and then, “He’s never coming back, my life is crap, I’m going to sit on the couch, eat iced cream all day and gain another a$$” and finally, ” ok, he’s gone, but I can see where I am likely better off without him-(see wanker comment) it was painful, but I am a stronger person for the event, let’s move on in life”
Laugh LOTS, only see funny-non boy related movies, eat iced cream, just don’t gain another a$$,hang with your girl friends as often as possible, and see how fast you can make your way to acceptance.
I wish I could hug you! You’ll be ok in the end, I promise.

If you want to. What reason did he gove for the break-up in the 1st place?

give.jeez

IMO contacting or seeing the “ex” too soon only makes it that much harder… it’s like torturing yourself as you’re trying to heal and get over things… but if you both think you can handle it, that’s up to you. The temptation to just go back to each other (for all the wrong reasons) is too great while you’re still healing… then you’ll just go back in the same old circle again…perhaps break up yet again ?? I think ex’s can become friends, but not right at first… once they are truly over things and have moved on, then it’s possible to be friends again.

hi sorry for that. but what was the cause of the break up.where you cheating on him or he just turned up to you and said that its over.i think he is also missing you but he is hiding that from you to see it.see what will happen when you meet and if he doesn`t tell you to make up, take that step and ask him that you still love him.maybe its what he wants to hear from.nice time.

In that case, I think you should just let him go… try hard to be strong. You cannot force someone to feel something if they don’t. On the other hand, if you let him go and let him miss you, he may learn that he feels differently. Best not to cling to him. His love is only good for you if he finds it himself, on his own!!!

If you love something, set it free….

I’d pray about it, and then take whatever direction you feel you should. you’re pretty emotional about it right now. Leave that decision for a bit.

I would cancel that meeting I think. I know the temptation is difficult tho…

I know…. :( I’m so sorry. I believe once someone wants to break up though, your best bet of even getting them back is letting them go….

but you must realize that may not happen either. But if it doesn’t, it’s for the best… they really didn’t love you the way you deserve to be loved.

Yeah it is… it’s really hard at first, might feel unbearable… but you can get through it. Just try to keep your mind busy and on other things, etc., keep busy so time passes… it will get easier. Just the change in routine makes it so hard at first… it’s only normal to miss that person who’s been there for so long… and the routine you had. He will be missing you too, take comfort in that… and that could be a good thing…

Awww, he really does care for you. I hope he will find his way back to you, if that’s what you want.

Well, this is tough but I think he needs to know he can’t play it both ways… break up with you, yet have you there… if he could get away with that, he might just leave it that way… he’s free, yet he has you… you know?? Maybe you should just suggest you don’t know if you’ll be going to that concert, let’s play it by ear… ;)… IF it comes up. But don’t contact him… let him do that part… let him worry a little if he’s made a mistake and now you aren’t calling him, etc., you don’t seem to be there.

No, not at all… there are so many people going through this sort of thing though, it happens to all of us. I know how very hard it is from my own experiences…

Yeah, I know…. :( … but it will have an effect just as much in reverse, when he suddenly realizes you are not contacting him and starts wondering what YOU are doing… :)

This is the worst part, the first days…. good time to take on a new hobby or something, just to keep busy with something!

:) A sense of humor helps too!!! You can climb that mountain!!!

Glad if I helped…. hang in there!! Let us know how you’re doing….

I hear you’re feeling better today? :) Wonderful!!!

I’m so glad to hear it!!! :) Keeping busy and having friends around sure helps!! Keep up the great work!

You’ve got the right attitude!! :)

Well, I’m a little iffy on that… but I know many that do. I kind of believe in the “universe”… and how positive thinking can affect what happens… :D