life help: I need to vent I don’t know if I am depressed or just overwhelmed, I am just not happy. - Help.com

First of all, if your boyfriend is still hung up on his ex-wife, its time to say goodbye. Seriously. Relationships are comprised of love, honesty, and commitment. It seems as though he lacks the COMMITMENT, and therefore you don’t have much of a relationship with him. He’s not worth your time, you could find way better. You are with someone because you care about them, which he obviously does not. As for your kids, how old are they? Don’t worry about what your boyfriend does for HIS kids, worry about what you and only you are going to do for yours (and you can start by finding a loving, supporting partner). They aren’t going to raise themselves. Show them that you are a strong, independent person that they can look up to for support, with or without a father. Times are tough, and I don’t know your exact situation, but I know that human beings are capable enough in there own right, and you can overcome this if you put your mind to it. No one can help you unless you want to help yourself.

Oh believe me I want to help myself I do like I said I work very hard everyday but it is so overwhelming I have 3 boys 15,13 and 12 and I really am doing all I can. He says he is not in love with his ex but I am sorry actions speak louder than words when she says jump he can not jump high enough to please her and she is still with the guy she left him for! It is crazy to me, I am not eggarating wither he pays for everything for her and what he can’t her new man does or his mother and yet he just leaves me to struggle I do not get it! Everytime I get any money he will say where are you going to take me out to dinner? How crazy is that? Like I said before I have stood by him through so much he did not have ajob when we first started dating I found him a great job, he had a drinking problem that landed him in the hospital I sat by his side the whole time, I just do not get it maybe nice guys really do finish last!!!!!!!

Yeah I am still with him I guess I am just a gluton for punishment I always thought the more I gave him he would realize how much I love him and start appreciating me but that hasn’t happened and I doubt it ever will I need to stop wishing and start looking at our relationship for what it is him walk all over me and me allowing it!!! Nice huh?

You don’t have to put up with that crap and I don’t know why anyone would. I don’t know you personally, but I imagine you’re a bright, strong person. DON’T BOTHER WITH THIS GUY ANYMORE. I don’t care what he does for his ex, her new partner, or his mother. Sure, he sounds like a real jerk, but you DON’T have to put up with it. Find someone else, or just don’t worry about anyone at all. As for support for your boys, why doesn’t your ex or family help? If you’re that bad off, try to look into your states welfare programs. I’m sure that would help. And try to get them involved in after school activites, to keep them busy and give you some time to relax. What do you do for a living?

I have went to my welfare system and they say that they can’t help me my ex husband does not workso his child support in very sporatic at best. I am a receptionist.
As for the after school activities they have done some but they all cost money. I am trying my best to keep my head above water but I have to be honest I am tired and feeling VERY over whelmed. I try not to care about what he does for anyone else it’s hard though when he leans on me so much but when I need him he is no where around, I never let him know it bothers me anymore because when I have in the past he tells me it is none of my business!

Like I said before, get out of that relationship. You can’t be expected to raise your kids AND him.

Sister - You are not married to him. Thier are men out there that would treat you human. I know there are. Get rid of him, focus on the joy of your kids, live life, and someone will turn up.