life help: I need help with a HUGE problem…the biggest in my life. - Help.com



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I need help with a HUGE problem…

the biggest in my life.

Alright..here comes the sad tale. My girlfriends parent had THE hugest fight ever imaginable…They were throwing stuff at each other, yelling, cursing…No physical contact through the whole thing…

However..her mom, who appeared to be a very nice woman, pulled a GUN on her dad (Who happens to be a police officer). So, after a few hours of terror, her dad calls the police, and they come and clear the whole thing up. Well, what REALLY saddens me is that soon after my GF told them what happened and said that her mom is going to jail, her mom screams that she wants to see her. She does talk to her, but only yells at her, saying that she lied when she told them what happened and that the whole fight was her fault…

Right now, she is at her Aunt’s house, and she is feeling very upset and yes, her parents are getting a divorce (Though my gf and I see it for the best). How can I help her pull though this?

This open post was written 5 months, 3 weeks ago | V/U/S: 204, 8, 9 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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worlds_cleverest_ham offline Verified User (5 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months, 3 weeks ago (4 minutes after post)

Like kizni said, just be there for her, comfort her, lotsa hugs and cuddles, I feel sorry for you *hug*

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helpingmehelpyou offline Verified User (5 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Undisclosed Location | 5 months, 3 weeks ago (5 minutes after post)

That’s a really hard situation for both of you and for her parents. You should have a conversation with your girlfriend about how you would like to be there for her. Ask her how you can help her the most. Maybe it’s just by listening to what’s on her mind, or maybe it’s by just sitting quietly and holding her. Only she really knows what she needs right now. The only thing I can say not to do is speak badly about her parents to her. Even if she says something negative about them, just listen. If you begin putting them down, it could make her upset with you… I know it sounds weird, but it happens. Good luck!!

annlovestars * offline Verified User (6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 106 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months, 3 weeks ago (26 minutes after post)

hi N

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cattail offline Verified User (9 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 8 #
Newark, NJ, US | 5 months, 3 weeks ago (1 hour, 56 minutes after post)

Your just being there means everything to her… let her vent about all this as she needs to, be a strong shoulder… that’s about all anyone can do. She’ll just need emotional support. Encourage her not to feel guilty if she does in any way… she’ll need to hear that. helpingmehelpyou gave very good advice above!! I’m glad she sees that the divorce is for the best at this point, and hopefully things will start improving for her now that it’s hit rock bottom.

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jonalexanders offline Verified User (9 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Undisclosed Location | 5 months, 3 weeks ago (2 hours, 13 minutes after post)

get her to talk and mainly just listen. it is good to talk it out

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Mas1st offline Verified User (6 months, 3 weeks) Help.com Volunteer Moderator Long Term User Shouts: 447 #
An Unknown Location | 5 months, 3 weeks ago (4 hours, 6 minutes after post)

Hot chocolate, a warm rug, listen closely and big hugs

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an offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 5 months, 2 weeks ago (1 week, 3 days after post)

Try to keep her separate from it. Let her parents do what they need to do and if they need to talk to her for support then after that she can vent to you. But if they are going to yell at her and blame her she should just not be in touch with them (whichever of them does that) until they snap out of it. So nice of you to want to help her. Just let her know you will do anything you can to help and suggest the above. And maybe take her away from it for a bit, even if it’s for the day, just get outside and chill out.

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