Love help: Can my husband communicate with other woman? - Help.com

It’s not too much you’re asking for, he could really understand. But do you want divorce only because of it?

Sorry; but I don’t see where he’s doing anything wrong? I understand you’re a bit uncomfortable, and he should respect that, but…if the two of you can’t have a few outside friends your marriage will be a l-o-n-g road.

Of course, there’s a fine line between “friendship” and “courtship” and a not-so-fine one if she’s just using him in some way. But long conversations seem pretty harmless to me.

Does he break his promises about more serious things too? Did he do something really unforgivable?

Hmmmm….

As a married woman with a thousand online friends of both sexes…. My husband knows he can read any communication between me and anybody at any time. He reads what I post here sometimes. He reads my emails. He reads through my pm’s at forums….once in a while. The point is, I’m not hiding anything. And if I say something that really bothers him, he says so.

So, no, I don’t think you should hide the way you feel. But I do think he should be open about his communications, and should allow you the opportunity to feel reassured that this is harmless.

It sounds as though your husband has a relationship that you’re uncomfortable with and you would like him to cut it off. It may be that your suspicions are founded and the relationship is inappropriate, or it could be that you’re reacting to something else in the relationship, like feeling distant from your husband, and jealous of the other woman because you feel she’s getting more attention. However, when you say you’re ready for a divorce, that makes me think that there’s a lot more going on, or at least you suspect there’s a lot more going on. Is this the case?

you know, she’s married he’s married to you, and both probably happily married so what if he talks to another women maybe he just needs to vent

ventings sounds right. dont leave him for talking. if u guys live in differnt countrys nothind could ever happen. tell him how u feel. i had a friend that was a girl and me and her always talked about life, mainly skoo. and my girl friend found out and got really mad and made me feel guelty. still makes me mad that she went about it that way but i stoped talken to her. if she calls me yea i wont be rude to her just talk. but not for to long. then i tell my girl friend so that she wont find out by lookin at my phone. lol. but yea tell him every thing u feel

I can see your point, of course he should cut things off with this woman… your husband is not the right person for her to be unloading her problems, if she has problems with her marriage or her life, she should be communicating with her own partner!! But I also understand how it’s hard for him to be rude to her, now that he has been involved in helping with her life problems. She is really in the wrong, for taking advantage of someone else’s husband to this extent. It does sound like your husband understands how you feel and actually wants to cut things off, but is finding it difficult. I think he’s going to have to be firm with her, and explain that this is now becoming a problem for him and disrupting his marriage. Some people are just very “needy” about talking things out with someone, and then they become so dependent on the person for help that it gets out of hand. Perhaps if he would stop “enabling” this situation, she would go talk to her husband and work on her real life rather than just needing to talk endlessly to someone else’s husband. Tell him she seems to be becoming too dependent on him now and she needs to deal with her own problems in her real life for herself. She’s a big girl, and at some point this situation is just no longer healthy for anyone.

Maybe they are just friends
Married people have friends too
but if it bugs you
and he knows it bugs you
maybe he shouldn’t talk to her anymore.
Is she married?
If so why are you worried?

I think you need to sit down and talk calmly to your husband about how upset this makes you feel - don’t argue, just explain your feelings and if you find that hard then write a note, that way you can get everything down that you feel and then discuss it with him after he’s read it. Don’t accuse him of anything, just let him know that it hurts you and explain why. Men and women can be friends though so you should have nothing to worry about, especially as you’re in different countries. I have plenty of male friends who are just friends. If anything she is probably insecure and needy - don’t let her make you feel the same way!!!!

Dude? If she was a man would you be this upset? If this was his male friend going through some things in his life really needing to talk about it with someone, would that be ok? If so, then why isn’t this ok? Men and women can be friends you know. I have many male friends that have girlfriends also…we still talk about life, realtionships an all. We don’t stop our personal discussions if they or I are in a relationship. I have also made male friends that are in a relationship when the friendship starts. I don’t see how me or they being in a relationship should stop us from being friends.