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ok.

i am 18 years old and i have a girlfriend for 4 months. I am also very affectionate to her and tell her i love her every chance that i get. The thing that bothers me and i dont understand why is. She has never once said she loves me without me saying it first. I love this girl but i dont understand her. She never shows her affection to me.
She gets mad at me becuase i talk to girls and basically only girls.
She said she doesn’t like it but I tell her sorry and she is going to have to deal with it because i love her and im not going to leave her.

I just dont understand at all what she is doing.
I derserve to be loved as much as she gets loved.
I dont want to tell her because she will just tell me do break up with her
We also dont hide anything from each other
But this is something that not hiding will not solve
I just dont know what to do.

I love her and I could Easly spend my life with her I just wish she was more affectionate

but in 4 months she has not gotten any more affectionate then now…

This open post was written 7 months, 1 week ago | V/U/S: 153, 4, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post Song bird may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. Song bird is a verified member, has been around for 7 months, 1 week and has 1 posts and 15 replies to their name.

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Love, girl, Affection, life, Year, girlfriend, Concealment, She Said, talk, Chance (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (4)

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mar98 offline Verified User (8 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 7 #
Dracut, MA, US | 7 months, 1 week ago (18 minutes after post)

yeah, girls are hard to undertstand! I think the fact that she gets jealous is a good sign she has some feelings for you. You said it’s been four months.. I know this guy who said I loved you first all the time to his girl and it took I think like almost close to 10 months before she started doing it first. Some girls are just like that.. it takes time. I think she does love you so just keep doing what you’re doing and maybe she’ll either start saying it first or she’ll show you her affection a different way. Like I said if she’s getting mad you’re talking to other girls that shows something and I think you should be pretty happy with that.

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indusric offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 7 months, 1 week ago (19 minutes after post)

Hi,

I don’t know if I am right with any of this and don’t mean to upset but these are some things to consider:

She may not be comfortable with saying “I love you”
There may be something that even though you’re both open and honest that she is not telling you. Don’t take this personally. I’ve been with my girlfriend for 2 years and she still takes time to open up on things.
She may find it hard to show affection. Some people have been that way all there lives. It’s like learning from scratch.
If you talking to other girls is bothering her then it might be that she has been in a prior relationship where she was cheated on. It could be that she is paranoid about losing you and so she doesn’t want to get too attached yet.

The main thing to remember is that if you love her then you can give her more time. It’s been 4 months. There is still the rest of your life.
If you still have the same problem a few more months down the line then talk to her.
The most important thing about a relationship is the communication.
Talk out these issues and see if you can get her to come out her shell and tell you what is wrong or if there is something really bugging her.

Hope I have helped

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clashcity19 offline Verified User (7 months, 3 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 34 #
An Unknown Location | 7 months, 1 week ago (1 hour, 48 minutes after post)

Some people just are not affectionate by nature. For example, I grew up in a very typical White Anglo Saxon Protestant household. We, culturally, are not touchy-feely, we don’t express many emotions, etc. It is possible that she has been raised this way. If that is the case, it will take her a long time to be able to train herself otherwise. She may NEVER feel comfortable with it. Maybe if you continue telling her how important it is to you she will be willing to try. But if she isn’t, it may be too hard for her to do so and you will have to accept her the way she is. I have had this problem in relationships too because I don’t really like to cuddle or display affection in public, etc. Good luck!

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Song bird offline Verified User (7 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 7 months, 1 week ago (21 hours, 27 minutes after post)

Thanks, I guess she just is not a good expresser of emotions. But we are a little diffrent. In school Shes guiet. Im extreamly loud make noise speak my mind.

Being diffrent means nothing really big of a deal.

We also talk about everything. I have told her that she lacks emotion twards me alot of the time, but hey (I have the rest of my life) But I dont want to see her in another guys arms. It would kill.

So I am going to deal with this untill it gets better if not then.

Well I have no room what to say that I would do Cause I have not crosses that Path.

And she also gets really bugged at my loudness Sometime. I cant help it. I only get 1 life and its my Seinor Year in High School. Thanks.

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