Love help: So tired and confused - Help.com

So tired and confused

Hi everyone, hope all is well. Here is my dilema:
So I am tired, lately I have not been able to go to sleep at a decent time
I usually now end up going to be at around 4 or 5 am, not because I am not tired
but because I can not fall a sleep, it does affect my mood, and I keep getting
these annoying head aches, I feel sad all the time and if I’m not sad, I’m
upset. I also feel useless, ugly and not worty, not to mention that I have
had the most suicide thoughts than ever.
I am having a lot of problems with my girlfriend, I guess we are going through
a rough patch, she feels unloved by me and I feel unloved by her, sometimes I
think that we are just too tired sometimes, since she does live a drive away,
and maybe the distance, work, school and everything is just exausting us.
don’t get me wrong, I love her, sometimes I just think she’d be better off
with out me.
I believe that us as humans, our flaw is to have the need to feel loved, and I want
to give love, and I want to feel loved as well. I don’t know how to explain this
I just want to explode and yell, I want to leave to a place where I am unknown, I
don’t want to miss, or be missed, I don’t want to worry about anything, I just want
to enjoy everything as we only live once.
I see the people I once knew, and in one hand I see the way I used to be, and how things
have not changed, on the other hand, I see things that could have been, but they never
will be, I feel trapped because I am afraid, I am afraid of being alone and I am afraid
of moving on, I want to move and make my own, but I am scared I will not make it.
I get this feeling that starts from my chest that become anger, and I am not an angry
person, or try not to be. I just want to be free from all this, I want to be me
with out anyone. just me.
I want my gf to understand that I am tired sometimes, that I still love her, and that
every time I try and talk to her it is not about me being right or trying to argue.
I need her to understand, to be more patience in me, to see the things I do for her
because I love her, I want her to mature.

I just feel like yelling

This open post was written 5 months, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 221, 5, 6 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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