Love help: I really love this one school and I want to go there soooooo bad next year but my dad says no! - Help.com

Why does he not want you to go there? Perhaps he has a really good reason, or perhaps his reason is based on some misunderstanding. What is it that you like about the school? Are you talking about a high school or a university?

Is this a secondary school, or a college? If you’re in middle school going into secondary school, I’d have to tell you not to worry at all. Secondary school really doesn’t matter in terms of where you go, it’s college that counts. I assume you’ve taken the standardized test (whether it’s the ISEE or the SSAT), gone to interviews and possibly written a few essays and been on a few shadows. It really shouldn’t matter, just relax, let the road take you where you end up and don’t worry (I did that when I was in 6th grade, and I ended up going to an excellent public school. I love it here, I don’t know what I’d do anywhere else, although I’m sure I’d be fine any way.) Just one word of advice: RELAX. You’ll thank me later.

oh anddddddddddd ok omg this guy (actually the guy’s friend) all ready told me he liked me! nobody has ever liked me! EVER! and he was even cute!

theresape- i’ll be in seventh grade. i like the fact that the kids are really really really nice. he doesn’t really have a good reason he just says i’m going to have to ice skate less. ice skating is my life and i don’t want it to be. or it costs too much. geeze! it costs like 3,000 a year! and we have higher priorities! ugh! why did my dad have to be in my family?!

thanks :) but umm ok im a middle schooler. what is secondary school???

If you are in the U.S. and it’s a private school, there’s a very good chance that there is financial aid available to your family if they cannot afford the cost of the school.

I’m not sure about what’s available in other countries.

I am also not quite sure how the cute guy who likes you and the skating interest fit into the situation. Are you saying that this is a school where you would have the opportunity to skate a lot, or are you saying that your dad can’t afford both private school and skating lessons? I’m confused.

i’m saying that the cute guy likes me and he is at the school. and I can’t do as much ice skating time as i do now because now im homeschooled. bleh

My suspicions are confirmed. I was in the same prediciment you were almost exactly 3 years ago. Let your parents pitch in, don’t battle about it too much because not only can you transfer later if things really aren’t working out for you, but you’ve got a real future ahead of you. I know it seems like the world to you, and you couldn’t imagine going anywhere else but you dream school, which for me changed at least 7 times (even though I only applied to 4 schools). When I said you’ve been through the process (ie, tests, interviews, shadowing, etc…) I’m saying you’re well prepared and have experience for the next time (I’m assuming) when you apply to college: the college process is exactly the same but at a larger scale. It’s great practice, and it puts you at an advantage for applying to those schools when the time comes. Your time wasn’t a waste, and it won’t be something you’ll regret for the rest of your life or thinking about until you’re gray and old, it’s a good use of your time and you’ll be set wherever you end up in the future.

As for your admierer, it’s only the begining for a lifetime of relationships for you. Middle school is full of boys and girls getting together, high school even more so. Let this guy slip away (or if you like him back, which it sounds like you do) spend time with him now and get practice in a relationship for the rest of middle school and high school. You’ll have plenty of oppurtunities to meet cute guys for the next 6+ years, so don’t grow too attached or saddened now. You’ll do fine for the rest of your years, trust me. You’re good to go. Just sit back, relax, and enjoy the rest of the year. Say good bye to your friends, think about your future and enjoy the next summer with an open mind getting ready to settle in and accept your next school and making a new set of friends, wherever that is. If you do those things, I can guarentee you’ll be happy in the future. 100% gaurentee.

I know what you mean cdog. but about that admirer guy i really don’t like i was just awed by the fact that a boy liked me! it seems as though no one would. going there feels like… i don’t know starting my life all over again without any mistakes! i feel as though no other school in the world is good enough. at my age… as you all probably know it’s tough and especially for girls. i had a bad experience at my old school and now it feels like every schools going to be that way. but after shadowing that one school i feel like every school is mean EXCEPT this one.

Ok, now we may be getting to the source of the problem. Parents who home school–and please don’t anyone beat me up for saying this, because I am NOT making a value judgment about it–are generally parents who want to control everything that goes into their children’s heads. They are afraid of what their kids will be exposed to in public or private schools. So if your father really believes that you should only know what HE and YOUR MOM want you to know, I can see where you would have a difficult time persuading him to let you go to an independent school. Most often they are pretty liberal.

I’m confused about why he let you “shadow” at all. Have your parents agreed to let you go to school outside the home? If so, do they have a favorite school that they are trying to steer you toward?

Truth is, now that I know how young you are, I am thinking that unless you have a VERY good reason for attending that particular school–and a cute boy is not a good enough reason–they are probably going to send you where THEY want you to go. My suggestion is that you prepare a careful presentation to your parents, explaining exactly why you think the school is right for you (from educational, social, and developmental perspectives, but not romantic ones). If they have not already done so, ask them to visit the school with you and discuss their concerns with the teachers, guidance counselors, and financial aid officers. Then stop whining and let them make their own decision. Once they’ve made it, work hard to make the best of the situation. If you handle it maturely, perhaps they’ll trust you to have more input when it comes time to choose a high school.

Good luck.

theresape… and everyone for this matter- i really don’t care about that cute guy thing. as you read my above post you will see that i was just amazed that a guy would like me. but that’s not the reason i want to go to the school at all! i want to go to the school because eeeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvverrrrrrrrrrryone is soooo nice and the teachers seem nice but strict. i need a social life. i’m all ready smart. oh and just to let you know i’m home schooled on an online school. my parents don’t teach me. this is my first year going there. i hate it because i now have no social life. any more questions?

I’d probably hate it, too. If you were my daughter, I would want to see you in a real school with real social interactions. But you are not my daughter. It’s your parents you have to convince.

Now, go read my advice, and follow it. I hope you can persuade them.