Love help: In March my husband’s two children came to live with us in our one bedroom flat. - Help.com

Hey there, I’m sorry about what you are passing through. I wish right now to have a million bucks just to buy you a bigger appartment and help you financially, because it seems that the main problem you have with them living with you is a financial problem, so just you can accept them.
I mean I really feel with you, but I feel with that girl and the boy more. I’m sorry. But children have no fault in what they are brought to. Ofcourse that girl would be lost, she would never know what to do, or how to feel. You can not blame her because she feels she wants her mom. She’ll probably consider you her mom after a period of time. I mean you seem a really good woman, you know? You made a great sacrifice in my opinion accepting them, there in your own bed room.
They’ll probably worship you if you do have feelings and you take care of them.
And on the other hand, it isn’t right to me if you return them to their stupid mother. I’m sorry, but who ever treats children badly is stupid and ignorant.

I wish you goodluck and whatever you do, no one really blames you. It’s their father’s and mother’s responsibilty to take care of them. But it is sure a great human act if you do accept them. I don’t really think that you wouldn’t be rewarded for such an act!

Goodluck again :)

I think it’s hard to help her, but love and taking care of someone would make wonders. It might take a long time for her to heal. Everything takes long time to heal. But she’ll get over it, and you would notice it soon.
Your love and their dad’s love would be enough. I would invite some people here to read your post too. Maybe they’ll give you a better advice too :)
Goodluck feestick

Continually reinforcing the positive, will help to counter the negative that has been spoken into her spirit.

Maybe exploring the subject more in depth, will help to uncover and deal with the reason behind her trying to blame herself for the problem, as well as helping her to realize that raising children properly is an adults job, not a childs.

Also, that a child cannot be blamed for an adults negligence.

Doing research online, about how to build confidence and self esteem, will be very helpful and can be applied as often as possible.

You should be eligible for food stamps with the two extra children to feed, as well as adding dependants will releive your tax burden also, and there might be other assistance available, Social Services should know of anything else that might be a help.

Helping the children to develop properly will bring lifetime rewards….

Blessings….

I am really sorry for everything that has happened. Like Silverwings said, the child cannot be blamed for what the adult has done. I guess in terms of helping the children, you can inform them that you care for them and that you are going to treat them much better than they have been treated. Continue to assure them that you care. In terms of finance, I guess the only thing for you to do is carry on as you are and try to see if you can claim any benefits as you are looking after them anyway.

I hope it all goes well for you.