computer help: Can you help us break our website, and critique it and tell us what is wrong. - Help.com

You’ve all been great. Keep it coming, we are definitely taking all of this in and passing it along… Generally, the company does video, and they outsource many of the “other services” through established channels.

Ok here is my critique, I hope you do not become offended and I really and just telling you what I think would make things better for you’re sight.

About US:

Your verbiage and grammar are confusing. I had to reread what you wrote several times before I got the full meaning of what you where trying to say. Had I been a client I would have walked away after the first attempt thinking “Well if he can’t get this simple page right I can’t trust him with my work” – that might not be a good impression of you and your work (I saw your demo and it looks good) but that would be my first impression and it’s a bad one.

Specifically you have a lot of run-on and redundant sentences with bad or no punctuation. This makes it confusing to know what you are trying to say. Also you use words like “client” and “product” too frequently and I don’t know if you are talking about me, or someone else; my product or your product.

Also all three of your text boxes say the same exact thing just in different ways, this also makes things confusing as I am expecting different information but come back with the same information. It makes me wonder if I am reading something wrong.

Your “About US” Page should be more simple and strait forward if you are looking to gain business clients. Business clients don’t care about fluff.

Who we are: should be exactly who you are and nothing more. Don’t talk about your camera or your past clients or even your products and don’t get over wordy. Also don’t talk about your self first, talk about your business first then how you fit into the business.

For example

Who we are: J.GLO Productions, Inc is a production studio who’s primary focuses is to create excellent and innovative production and marketing marital for our client base. Whether your marketing and production applications are B2B or B2C, J.GLO Productions promises to provide outstanding service from creativity to post-production. We can provide as little or as much assistance in marketing and production as you require and guaranty you will be satisfied with our work.

Owner/Operator: Jason Glover (don’t put the nickname, business clients wont like that) is the owner and (no &) operator of J.GLO Productions INC. He brings with him 14 years of media and marketing experience and has worked with such clients as Pepsi and Suzanne Somers (don’t list all of them now). Jason is very proud of the work he has done in the past and will strives for perfection when dealing with you and your needs.

What We Do: Here you should be very specific on what you do, for get about fluff and clients expectations you took care of that in the “Who we are” section. Here is where you get into the nitty gritty. You fillm using a JVC Por …. You edit using a …. You work with cliantis to make A, B and C.

Then add section for past clients you worked with. And now list all the clients and what you did for them.

I don’t think you need a client expectation: section. A client is going to expect perfection and you will try to deliver that, everyone knows this. If you want to talk about who you understand the intricacies of the industry do it in the What We Do:

Last put your mission statement:

” J.GLO PRODUCTIONS, INC. is committed to our client’s success. We seek to find the appropriate balance to drive cost effective customer acquisition, name recognition, and viral video campaigns, while insuring that we seek qualified, quality clients or customers to insure your long-term success. “

At the beginning.

more to come…

DDemo and Portfolio Page:

I like your demo, except two things.

1) You spend a lot of time on a wedding, but I get the impression that you’re looking for business clients not consumer clients. So it seems as though the wedding martial is out of place. A biasness may see it and say “Oh this guys a wedding camera-man trying to pretend to be a marketing expert – pass” that’s not the impression you want to give.

2) all that power point slides at the end would be better simply as a power point that one could read write off of your website. It seems to be giving valuable information about your services, but I really cant read it in the video format.

Camera Page:

This is good except for one thing. The picture of the camera is ugly with all the white specks around the edges, which come from trying to cut it out of a back ground. What this is telling me is that you aren’t at all good at production issues, you can’t even cut out a picture. I assume this is not the case for you, but that is the impression you are giving.

Editing Page:

I don’t under stand your editing page, am I to believe you can do these things, that you will do these things, or are you just giving me the specifications of some software? And what am I calling to get special prices form. Its not at all clear and since I am the client I don’t want to think, I just want you to tell me, I have wasted to much time on this website already and I have a million other things to do today :)

Other Services:

This page at the top is good, I see what you are offering. But the bottom gets a little confusing.

Whats this for?

Current Client Portfolio - www.latifsjewelry.com

What am I suppose to get from looking at that?

And again why am I calling you for special prices? If I call you of course I want prices, whats so special about it?

And what’s this about labor not being included? Included in what? The Special prices? But you arent stating any prices so wouldn’t you tell me the total cost when I call you for a price – are you trying to trick me or something.

Finally I have two more things.

“Sign up for discounts and special offers” something doesn’t sit right with me about this. You don’t have any prices on your webpage, so what is a special offer? How will I know your giving me a special offer if I don’t know what it is your offering at what price.

I would spend a little more time with the colors and layout of your webpage. It seems fun and inviting in that dark artist kind of way, but as a business I want to see a clean professional website that talks about the professionalism of the company, not about its creativity. A lot of people are creative out there, what I need is a partner I can count on.

One last thing. the links at the bottom of each page are bad.

Home should take you to your about page since it is the first page with content. Why would people want to go back to your splash screen just to have to click a nother link just to get to the about page.

The privacy policy page is empty

and the terms & conditions page is empty