boyfriend help: im only 15 and my boyfriend does drugs and i want to help him stop cause we have a baby on the way and hes only 16 .so what can i do to help him? - Help.com

his parents know and they make it seem like no big deal i mean yeah his mom gets mad but does nothing so i need something else to do that dosn’t seem to work……thanks anyway

Your parents? Ask them?

his mom has seen him all mest up and does nothing and hes not a very nice boyfriend by the way so its kinda hard… i need help alot of help

sadone01 wrote:
his mom has seen him all mest up and does nothing and hes not a very nice boyfriend by the way so its kinda hard… i need help alot of help

Get yourself over to your local Planned Parenthood office/clinic, get rid of that kid, and get the hell away from this guy and his family.

… leave him, he doesn’t sound good for you or the baby. If he gets caught doing or selling drugs it could get you in trouble and you could lose your baby. You don’t need that kind of stress either, especially when you are trying to take care of a child. If he isn’t nice now, he is only going to get worse. I know from experience! You don’t need him to help you, it would be nice if he would and sincerely help but I doubt he will. All you need is the support from your family and no one else.

thanks but its cause i love this guy and i domt want my baby without a dad i mean thats the only reason i want to help him cause i want my family together i hope u undersatand

missjojo12 wrote:
… leave him, he doesn’t sound good for you or the baby. If he gets caught doing or selling drugs it could get you in trouble and you could lose your baby. You don’t need that kind of stress either, especially when you are trying to take care of a child. If he isn’t nice now, he is only going to get worse. I know from experience! You don’t need him to help you, it would be nice if he would and sincerely help but I doubt he will. All you need is the support from your family and no one else.

Alexaxas wrote:

sadone01 wrote:
his mom has seen him all mest up and does nothing and hes not a very nice boyfriend by the way so its kinda hard… i need help alot of help

Get yourself over to your local Planned Parenthood office/clinic, get rid of that kid, and get the hell away from this guy and his family.

no i cant do that i want my baby and im not going to kill it or give a way all cause the dad is like that righht know i want to see how i cant help him and if thing dont cahnge wel better for me to leave him but not destroy another life because of my dumnb decisions ……..

trust me, i do. i had an abusive boyfriend for 2 years. I got pregnant at 14 and tried my best to help him become more responsible and NICE so that we could have a family. He only got worse. your boyfriend isnt going to change, not for you, not for anyone. if he is going to change its because he wants to. you cant do anything. a baby does need a father but it doesnt sound like he is going to be the father your baby deserves. i know how badly you want this to work, and i completely understand what you are feeling. it is all your choice, but please, if your gut tells you to get out, then get out!

well for one he should know that your family is FAR MORE IMPORTANT then drugs. If he does not know that, then can he be relied on as a father? Try to give him time, but not too much time.

well thats true ill see if i’ll do that thank alot….

Compton *Cat* wrote:
well for one he should know that your family is FAR MORE IMPORTANT then drugs. If he does not know that, then can he be relied on as a father? Try to give him time, but not too much time.

planned parenthood is not for abortion. they can help you with everything you need. they will make sure you see the right doctors, they’ll make sure you have money for crib, things like that. you have got to put you and the baby first. it is not good to be stressed out while pregnant. you should try to get him into rehab and if he won’t go..you should leave him!

Alexaxas wrote:

sadone01 wrote:
his mom has seen him all mest up and does nothing and hes not a very nice boyfriend by the way so its kinda hard… i need help alot of help

Get yourself over to your local Planned Parenthood office/clinic, get rid of that kid, and get the hell away from this guy and his family.

abortion is not the best choice…that’s murder..unless the baby was killing her inside..i’s not right to kill it..you’re 15 i’m sure there are some jobs out there for you…there are also online jobs…remember to stay in school for the baby…and yeah stay away from the guy..he’s not going to change just keep in touch with his family(only if they want to keep in touch with the baby)

If you are personally against abortion thats fine, put the baby up for adoption. At 15, having and raising a child is just about the worst thing for either you or the baby. The odds are strongly against you being able to get your life straightened out if you keep the child. And if you can’t get your life worked out, how are you going to provide a good life for your child?

Alexaxas wrote:
If you are personally against abortion thats fine, put the baby up for adoption. At 15, having and raising a child is just about the worst thing for either you or the baby. The odds are strongly against you being able to get your life straightened out if you keep the child. And if you can’t get your life worked out, how are you going to provide a good life for your child?

yeah adoption…but not abortion.there’s a family that want a fresh new baby..and will love the h3ll out of it..but remember if your parents can help you then keep it…because you will regret giving it away…and you will remember that baby every single day of your life..

Again, even with your parents help, unless you are an extremely remarkable individual (something that having a baby at 15 does not often indicate), keeping the baby will likely ruin its life. If you are set on bringing a new life into the world, you should be more concerned with that life’s prospects than with your own fleeting happiness.

Either way, don’t bother trying to get the father clean, just get away from him. He doesn’t sound like he’s worth anyone’s time. People don’t change.

Telling her that she isn’t going to make it as a parent is in no way encouraging. It is up to her whether she wants to keep HER child and if she decides that she wants to keep it, then she is perfectly capable of raising her child. With help of family of course. It will be never ending hard work, but you don’t care about that when it’s your child. If she wants it bad enough and if she is willing to accept the responsibility that a baby brings then she can. There are ways to get through this and she will find her way. But she doesn’t need people telling her that she is going to ruin her babies life and she is going to fail. And I don’t think it’s right that you make it sound like she is being selfish for wanting to keep her child.

I’m simply speaking statistically. Yes its i>possible /i> to beat the odds, but it is incredibly unlikely. There are two lives at stake here and whether those are happy, fulfilled, productive lives is up to this young girl (and hopefully her responsible parents).

I’ll even give you a hand educating yourself on the consequences of teenage parenthood:
http://aappolicy.aappublications.org/…
http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/journa…

Alexaxas wrote:
Again, even with your parents help, unless you are an extremely remarkable individual (something that having a baby at 15 does not often indicate), keeping the baby will likely ruin its life. If you are set on bringing a new life into the world, you should be more concerned with that life’s prospects than with your own fleeting happiness.

Either way, don’t bother trying to get the father clean, just get away from him. He doesn’t sound like he’s worth anyone’s time. People don’t change.

saying that people don’t change is sooo wrong! people do change. not always when we want them to but everyone has the ability to change and be a better person! and people do it! anyway as for THIS GUY doesn’t sound like he’s ready. she should get far away from him, and if your family is willing to really really help and support you and the baby, you can make it work. if you know that the baby will not have a good life you should think about adoption. i personally do not think that you should even consider abortion.

oh wait a minute. just because you are 15 does not mean that you can not raise a child in a loving stable environment. 15is not the ideal age for motherhood, but it doesn’t automatically mean that there is no hope. i think you will need help, and if your family is willing to give it to you, and if you believe in your heart and you are ready to make the sacrifices necessary to bring a child into this world, it is possible. you must educate yourself, being a mom is hard work. i’m 29, my son is 7months old, it’s very hard, i couldn’t have done it at 15. only you know within yourself what you should do

anyone can beat statistics and i dont need to read that crap. a lot of 15 year olds are way better mothers than a lot of experienced middle aged women. it doesn’t matter how old you are, but every girl and woman has mother instincts and this girl is taking them and as a mother she is going to make sure that her life and the life of her baby are completely fulfilled.

hasn’t your mom or dad ever told you when you were younger “don’t ever let anyone tell you you can’t do anything” they aren’t just saying it, it’s true. and if this girls wants it bad enough then she is going to do it and prove you and everyone else who don’t believe in her wrong.

i’m not going any further with this, i said what i have to say.

i agree with you missjojo12. it was annoying to read everyone telling her that she can’t do it. she can and she does not have to put her child up for adoption. i think that would be traumatizing-to carry a baby inside of you while he grows, then have it, see YOUR beautiful creation, and then give it away! omg-no way….. like you said you can do anything you put your mind to! just believe in yourself.

jezzy9 wrote:
i agree with you missjojo12. it was annoying to read everyone telling her that she can’t do it. she can and she does not have to put her child up for adoption. i think that would be traumatizing-to carry a baby inside of you while he grows, then have it, see YOUR beautiful creation, and then give it away! omg-no way….. like you said you can do anything you put your mind to! just believe in yourself.

yes yes and yes!!well said