Love help: I would really want someone to guide me… i had a 10 yr relationship that went down the drain because of cheating an dishonesty…. - Help.com

I say give it a try. every relationship takes a lot of hard work and dedication from both people and even this can be overcome if you both try.
I don’t think splitting is good for the kids. I have seen WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too many people messed up by split parents. seriously, I’ve seen a LOT of problems in kids that don’t have parents that love each other.
go back to the start, ask yourself why you loved him in the first place. take a few evenings alone, go on dates. make it a regular practice to go on dates every month or so.

this will be VERY hard to get over, but I promise that if you can keep your home together, it will be worth it.
if he isn’t giving his all, it won’t work, but the same goes for you. remember that.

well in that case, why have you stayed with him so long?? like I said, if he is’t giving oyu relationship his all, he isn’t worth it. your relationship will never work out if he doesn’t stop being like that, and don’t think that you can change him because you really can’t. too many people think they can change their partners and end up in crap situations they never wanted

how long has he been like that?

no how long has he been mean to you?

hmmm
well Ithink oyu should have a sit down with him where you’re both calm and even if he starts to get mad, just stay calm and keep a calm volume to your voice and tyr to just talk to him and figure out what needs to be done to fix the relationship. give it a couple weeks and if you’re still not happy and things show no sign of changing, go ahead and think about leaving him

Maria, there are two kinds of guys who have extramarital affairs. The first type is the guy who is always looking for an opportunity to boost his ego. The second type is the guy who wasn’t “looking” until he felt his wife didn’t love, respect or appreciate him. The first type is always looking for a thrill, while the second type is looking for some kind of validation from a woman. You will have to ask yourself if you concerned yourself with his needs, if you ignored him a lot or marginalized his feelings, or if you were always showing some kind of resentment. Did you overfocus on the kids in an effort to ignore him? Not saying you did, but you need to ask yourself these questions. The male ego is very fragile. Also, if a wife thinks it is her duty to keep her husband cut down a notch or two, she runs the risk of his meeting a woman who feels it is her duty to upgrade him a notch or two–and take him from her. In the final analysis, the first type of guy should be given the old heave ho, but the second type of guy most likely still loves his wife but just needs to have some validation from her. You have to decide what type of guy you’ve got–and what you might have done to contribute to his feelings of insecurity.

You won’t feel like you’re in love right now. You are hurting. Your husband is hurting, too. Maybe you can both get into marriage counseling and he can get into therapy to get certain personal issues straightened out. Don’t jump into a divorce. Make it your last option–never, ever your first unless your life is in danger or your spouse is a complete, unrepentant jerk.