Love help: If you had to choose between someone who you love or someone who loves you which would you go for? - Help.com

If you had to choose between someone who you love or someone who loves you which would you go for?

And to be more specific, the person you love does not love you back, but you are not in love with the other person who is in love with you.
Also, no, I am not experiencing this. I have just recently finished reading a series where the main character had to make this desicion. And it made me think, ‘What would I do?’

This open post was written 1 year, 5 months ago | V/U/S: 1,387, 29, 16 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


Reciprocity (0) Reciprocation Failure -- The poster has NOT helped anyone else yet!

Since writing this post kim. may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. kim. is a verified member, has been around for 1 year, 8 months and has 18 posts and 1,346 replies to their name.

Post Tags (8)

Replies (29)

Where were you?

Click and drag to move the map around. FAQ: How we place people on this map »
You can also watch events on Help.com as they happen
Mouse over the map for 2 seconds to see an expanded, interactive view

n offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (11 minutes after post)

well if you don’t love someone back then it really doesn’t matter how much they love you, it just won’t work
and the same thing goes for loving someone
both people have to love each other if not it’s not true love

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
This account has been deactivated.
i love Tigger!!!!!!! offline Verified User (1 year, 10 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (15 minutes after post)

i wouldn’t be w/ someone who i don’t love and if the person didn’t love me i wouldn’t be able to stand knowing he might cheat on me. i pick neither. wat’d u choose?

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: awesome pix!
Dan TL offline Verified User (2 years, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
La Mirada, CA, US | 1 year, 5 months ago (18 minutes after post)

!!! thats is incredibly hard !!! No one has ever liked me, but loving someone who doesn’t care for me is a waste… So I’d get them 2 together and maybe set them up for a date.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
friendlyheart offline Verified User (1 year, 9 months) Long Term User Shouts: 22 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (37 minutes after post)

that could be really confusing..but neither of this it is real love so i guess i would give up on both of them and I would start a new life without them :)

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: Hey guys
okei! offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 111 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (51 minutes after post)

someone who loves me and who is extremely handsome :p

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
okei! offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 111 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (52 minutes after post)

just a joke though. unreciprocated love is painful. don’t want any of that anymore.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
shosta8 offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (1 hour, 21 minutes after post)

I would pick the one who loved me… because I’ve heard a saying for guys that if you have a girl who doesn’t love you, fill her with enough love of herself that whatever is in excess and spills out can flow right back to you.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
åshl3ii offline Verified User (1 year, 10 months) Long Term User Shouts: 9 #
Adelaide, 05, AU | 1 year, 5 months ago (3 hours after post)

i would go with the person i love

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
tricky offline Verified User (3 years) Long Term User Shouts: 65 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (5 hours, 7 minutes after post)

had that question in mind before, after some thinking and stuff ,, i decided that when that comes in front of me i would think about so till than i stand in between ^_^

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
aehtla offline Verified User (2 years, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 5 #
Nassau, 23, BS | 1 year, 5 months ago (11 hours, 38 minutes after post)

I would choose to love myself because then that way I would win and have someone who loves me and someone who I love ; )

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
kmichelle offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (11 hours, 45 minutes after post)

I would choose, maybe conceitedly, the person who loves me. Because, who knows, they might surprise me and I might love them back someday.
Assuming, though, that they’re okay with the fact I don’t love them back. If they weren’t okay, and were always trying to convince me to love them, I’d go insane with guilt and annoyance.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
erin offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
Augusta, GA, US | 1 year, 5 months ago (12 hours, 48 minutes after post)

Hard question…
But I’m curious what the main character of the series decided.

If it ever happens, I think I would try to do what Aehtla said, though…love myself and show the guy I like what he’s missing by being single.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: Nightmares really hurt.
kim. offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (14 hours, 20 minutes after post)

If I had to choose between two people in this situation, honestly, I was thinking to go for the person who loves me. Like, not starting out with a romantic relationship, but maybe hanging out with them more, and like kmichelle said, I might fall in love with them someday.

The main character of the series said these exact words: “I’m afraid I just can’t bring myself to give up just yet on my precious first love.”
So, she decided to keep pursuing the one who she loved. :)

It would be a hard desicion though…

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
kim. offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (14 hours, 21 minutes after post)

Thanks for replying! ♥

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
erin offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
Augusta, GA, US | 1 year, 5 months ago (16 hours, 1 minute after post)

kim. wrote:
If I had to choose between two people in this situation, honestly, I was thinking to go for the person who loves me. Like, not starting out with a romantic relationship, but maybe hanging out with them more, and like kmichelle said, I might fall in love with them someday.

that reminds me of two people…
your sister and the guy who likes her.
uncanny. xP
but cool.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: Nightmares really hurt.
kim. offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (16 hours, 34 minutes after post)

erin wrote:

kim. wrote:
If I had to choose between two people in this situation, honestly, I was thinking to go for the person who loves me. Like, not starting out with a romantic relationship, but maybe hanging out with them more, and like kmichelle said, I might fall in love with them someday.

that reminds me of two people…
your sister and the guy who likes her.
uncanny. xP
but cool.

haha. yes~
from me knowing her(and her incredibly high standards) it is going to take a lot for her to fall in love with him.
He’s going to have to do something big…something that doesn’t creep her out but makes her happy. :D
…and he’s probably going to have to wait until she is older.
Love is the last thing on her mind right now.

But I do hope things turn out with a happy ending. ♥

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
broken little girl offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (4 days, 21 hours after post)

i would chose the person i love if he hadent already broke my heart

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
crs_mil offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (1 week, 1 day after post)

Im not sure anyone could ever not choose the person they love. Its just the way the love is.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
WashuChan offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (1 week, 1 day after post)

shosta8 wrote:
I would pick the one who loved me… because I’ve heard a saying for guys that if you have a girl who doesn’t love you, fill her with enough love of herself that whatever is in excess and spills out can flow right back to you.

That makes my heart feel super happy! (Nihao, Kai-lan, NickJr) But really, it makes my heart feel warm and happy. This is the second quote that made me feel nice. Thanks Shosta!

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: XBox 360 games.
WashuChan offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (1 week, 1 day after post)

kim. wrote:
If I had to choose between two people in this situation, honestly, I was thinking to go for the person who loves me. Like, not starting out with a romantic relationship, but maybe hanging out with them more, and like kmichelle said, I might fall in love with them someday.

The main character of the series said these exact words: “I’m afraid I just can’t bring myself to give up just yet on my precious first love.”
So, she decided to keep pursuing the one who she loved. :)

It would be a hard desicion though…

SWEET!!! Beautiful!

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: XBox 360 games.
WashuChan offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (1 week, 1 day after post)

Unfortunatly, I couldnt choose. It would be to hard for me, but i would have to tell the person who loves me that we are not ment to be, He would cry man tears and look serious, turning his head so as not to let me see his emotions. “I see. Im sorry we could not be.” And walk off into the twilight, leaving me alone to face the darkness of the walk home, why Im walking home is a question, but i am. I would look up to the stars, watching as one pops into existance, then another. “Was this right?” I would ask them, but they would only twinkle and shine, telling me its up to me. I would breath in and then sigh, continuing on my journey to my home.

Oh sorry! got carried away, but yea, I couldnt choose. XD!!

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: XBox 360 games.
kim. offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (1 week, 1 day after post)

WashuChan wrote:
Unfortunatly, I couldnt choose. It would be to hard for me, but i would have to tell the person who loves me that we are not ment to be, He would cry man tears and look serious, turning his head so as not to let me see his emotions. “I see. Im sorry we could not be.” And walk off into the twilight, leaving me alone to face the darkness of the walk home, why Im walking home is a question, but i am. I would look up to the stars, watching as one pops into existance, then another. “Was this right?” I would ask them, but they would only twinkle and shine, telling me its up to me. I would breath in and then sigh, continuing on my journey to my home.

Oh sorry! got carried away, but yea, I couldnt choose. XD!!

aha, that was a very creative response! I liked it~ :]

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
WashuChan offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (1 week, 1 day after post)

Welcome! I could add a heartfelt but wrenching tale of the other side, the one who doesnt love me. But, It is painful and should not be repeted, for the infulence could untamitaly cause side effects such as chest pain, watery eyes, blubbering, wet cheeks, and loud walles of emotional agony.

I LOVE USING MY BIG WORDS! I should start writing…. COOL! :D!

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: XBox 360 games.
littlenick offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 158 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (2 weeks after post)

Love is strange and weird. Love stinks!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=GluCM_ggMvw

Watch this video!

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
Help me with: How to Get a Job
kim. offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (2 weeks after post)

littlenick wrote:
Love is strange and weird. Love stinks!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=GluCM_ggMvw

Watch this video!

oh, I agree 100% with that right there! haha

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
WashuChan offline Verified User (1 year, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 5 months ago (2 weeks, 1 day after post)

But love is wonderful at the same time. Its beautiful, painful, happy, sad, fluttery, hateful, and just an all out good feeling, and a bad one at that.

Its a 50/50 thing. :D

Help me with: XBox 360 games.
bugaloo61 offline Verified User (1 year, 3 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 3 months ago (1 month, 3 weeks after post)

dont waste you time on someone who dosnt love you. and dont waste your time on someone you dont love. the love should be comming from both derections. and it is ok to love someone even if your not IN love with them and vice versa.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
terry_santill offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 2 months ago (3 months, 2 weeks after post)

i would go for the one who loved me, because at least they would make me feel special and maybe i can learn to love them

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators
This account has been deactivated.
dark_light offline Verified User (2 years) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
Manchester, I2, GB | 2 months ago (1 year, 3 months after post)

Choose who you love. You might resent picking the person you don’t love because you dont have feelings for them.

Quote this reply Report this reply to moderators

Invite Others to Help

A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.