Love help: I am 17 years old. - Help.com



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I am 17 years old.

I have been dating my second boyfriend for almost 2 years now. We talk about the future and everything is alright. We have plans and it’s great. Although I feel like I’m missing out on a lot of things because I’m still young. I feel I’m not going to feel the real college experience with him. but I’m in love with him and like I said, have been with him for about 2 years. We’ve broken up once for two days and it tore me apart. I don’t think I can go through that again but I still can’t help but think I’m missing out on the dating thing. He’s the kind of guy I could spend the rest of my life with but I feel like I met him when I was too young. Now I just wish we met later in life and when I can go out and do things first…
Does anyone know what I’m going through or any advice to give me…

This open post was written 1 year, 4 months ago | V/U/S: 202, 10, 6 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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HelpBot offline Verified User (0 minutes) Shouts: 5 #
San Francisco, CA, US | 1 year, 4 months ago (0 minutes after post)

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hey...iknowyou offline Verified User (1 year, 7 months) Long Term User Shouts: 18 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (3 minutes after post)

College isn’t just about meeting girl/boyfriends. I’ve been going out with my girlfriend since long before I started college but I’m still having a great time at it. As long as it is a healthy relationship and doesn’t mind you doing things on your own then I don’t see why it would be any kind of problem that would prevent you from enjoying college life. Hope this helps :)

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Help me with: Assisted Suicide.
That Other Dude offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (3 minutes after post)

Missing out on the dating scene?

What is the point of dating? To find someone you want to be with, which you already have. I wouldn’t call that missing out, I’d call that pretty **** lucky. If it takes you thirty tries or one to find the right person it doesn’t matter. You have the one you want so just stick with it.

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essence offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (7 minutes after post)

Although im not in your situation my friend is but shes 18 going on 19. She always ask me if she is missing out on college life. Plus this is her first real relationship but i can never answer her because i dont know. Some people dont mind others feel they need to experience life on their own before settling down. I think you can still have fun and be in a relationship. Heck why not experience it with someone you truly care about. You can have your own life away from him and do things with him as well. So in saying that i dont think you will be missing out on any thing.

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essence offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (9 minutes after post)

But if he is hindering you from doing the things you like or not encouraging/supporting you to do things you find interesting then you should think about whether this is what you want or not.

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lagalleta offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (23 minutes after post)

you have been with him since you was 15 if i am not mistaken, and you say that you feel you been missing a lot of things because you are with him. Well let me tell you you dont have to miss anything, talk to him, tell him how do you feel about missing the things that goes around your age, he will understand and probably both of you can enjoy and share things together. you may be surprice.
Good Luck!!!!!!!!!!!

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Left offline Verified User (1 year, 5 months) Long Term User Shouts: 5 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (41 minutes after post)

I have been with my man for almost 20 years and yes we have had major ups and downs in that time.
We were 16 & 17. We have gone through alot in our years together. I have enjoyed growing up with him and maturing. Experimenting on lots of levels won’t go into detail. Having his children. When we met I fell in love after about 3 days he took a bit longer. I chose him over a career in the army. I love and respect him and will continue for as long as its returned.

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bovinepant offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (45 minutes after post)

Don’t end a relationship you enjoy because you MIGHT miss out later, doesn’t make any sense. C’mon, “feel the real college experience with him” what do you suppose the “real college experience” is? Bucket bongs, spring break and frat orgies? University is a stimulating and exciting environment, theres plenty to do besides what many like to call “experience” and having a relationship isn’t a hindrance. Further more you might find that you’ll grow apart naturally as your studies and interests develop and you don’t need each other so much anymore, thats nothing to be afraid of and will be manageable too. I wouldn’t anticipate too much just yet, be happy where you are, if it doesn’t fit later, deal with it then.

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Nothing & No1 offline Verified User (1 year, 8 months) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
Boston, MA, US | 1 year, 4 months ago (1 hour, 7 minutes after post)

yeh you def met him too young. Man I remeber 17 I thought I was an adult and come to realize now a 23 I was sooo immature and you learn alot and your mentality is so dif. enjoy your collge years cuz you’ll never get those back.

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centralcoastsingles offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (15 hours, 51 minutes after post)

You cannot say either way. As leader of a local singles group, I hear all sorts of stories both ways. Some say they wish they had not started that young, others say they wish they had. Just realize that there is a trade off. If someone stifles you and keeps you from being who you need to be, that is not a healthy relationship. You need someone who will grow with you and share with you. If he cannot do that, then perhaps your relationship will make you miss out. If he can swing with the pendulum, then maybe it will work out. There is no crystal ball. People let fear rule them either way. Fear that you won’t grow and will miss out, fear of being without him. You can only see where it goes in time. If you stick with him, and it hinders your progress in life, then it is not healthy. If he encourages you and helps you move forward, then it is good.

Most women who regret starting early say they wish they had taken time to discover themselves and build their life first. They wish they had finished school and grown before picking a man. There is still no guarantee of a healthy relationship later. Just don’t hold yourself back from life and prosperity because you felt tied to someone. A gf of mine was very well off, with lots of school and success in her career. This all happened AFTER losing her high school sweetheart. She continued with school while married, but was not able to pursue her career until she divorced him for cheating.

What I am saying is that you are letting fear control you either way. Make a choice that will be right for you and stick with it. Don’t let fear stand in the way of your future, whatever that might be. Make the choice and feel good about it.

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