Love help: Does vasectomy reversal really work? - Help.com

My advice wouldn’t be what you’d want to hear. Dating people that are still married is so often a mistake. Waiting til they are fully divorced, then dating them, is the way to go. Maybe you could tell him that you will wait for him to divorce, then you can both see where your relationship will lead, but until then you both will remain just friends. You are getting mixed up in a divorce that you frankly don’t belong in. Let them sort it out, then step back in when the dust has settled.

Situations like this are exactly why you should never get involved with a married man, even if he’s going through a divorce, because you can find yourself dealing with the retaliation of his wife (maybe she see’s you as stealing her husband), plus you’re getting involved with him while he’s going through his own turmoil having to deal with the divorce itself.

My advice to you is to give him some space. Let him sign the papers, then see if he’s the same man then that you love now. I’m sure that he is going through a lot of stress, but he shouldn’t be taking things out on you. You also shouldn’t have to deal with any mess from his wife. I hope that he’s not just passing time with you or using you as a ‘distraction’ while he sorts out his own issues.

thanks for the advice, thats exactly what im feeling right now.
i keep wondering to my self ‘’ does he really love me?'’ or is he just with me to pass time. the thing is he says he loves me, he always asks me to come with him to the UK, hes already introduced me to his family so all this has really got me confused. :-(

Well, it sounds like he’s confused too. And could you blame him? He’s got two women fighting about him. And there are kids involved. That part makes me sad. But in the end, you have to think about your well-being. The way he treats you and his wife’s behaviour bring too much unnecessary stress. Hopefully after he’s signed the papers and things are final with the divorce, he’ll come back to you, the same man that you fell in love with, or maybe even better.

I hope things will work out for both of you.

Let him go. It sounds like he needs to figure a lot of things out and he needs to heal properly. It’s very apparent that his ex-wife isn’t in the right frame of mind by how she’s attacking you, it would probably take anyone a while to recover from that. Just because it’s over for now doesn’t mean it’s over for good. Let him go, let him figure out what he needs to do, how he needs to heal and what he needs to do about the kids. It’s not fair for him to treat you (or anyone else) poorly in the process.

“If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don’t, they never were.”

very true snowflake i totally agree with you. the thing is just yesterday i spoke to him very calmly and asked him if it was ok if i went for a couple of weeks to France alone to see my friends, i told him it was a good idea since i thought he needed some space i even booked him a day at the Spa this weekend for a nice Balinese message and herbal anti stress bath, but his reply was ‘’no i don’t need space, i would feel awful if you went on vacation and i didn’t see you for weeks!!!'’ in a way hearing that made me feel nice but deep down inside i down feel happy i feel unsure about my emotions towards him after the way hes treated me during his divorce process.

i still love him but my heart feels slightly bruised!

Sorry, but his response sounds selfish. You need to tell him about the pain YOU are feeling and why you are going. If he cares about you, he should understand. If not, you go and take care of yourself.

yes this is now you wife real tib have her with you two hands