Love help: How do I know if my boyfriend is the one for me? - Help.com

For me, it took knowing myself and what I wanted.

So when I met my husband, I was able to clearly see that we shared the same beliefs and understandings on religion, finances, family and the future. I went out with him on a lark, certain that, at best, it would be a fun, dizzy summer of flirting and infatuation and silliness. but the more I talked to him, and the more he kept talking about the sorts of things that matter most to me, the more I began to realize that he was The One. We had plenty of ups and downs due to circumstances beyond our control, but my heart and head kept telling me that this was the guy to stick by.

I think it comes with maturity and experience. I was 27 when I met him.

We rarely fought, and when we did, we fought fair, if that makes sense, and with a common goal of resolving our issues and being together.

the right guy makes you laugh and wants to solve your problems. and likewise, you make him laugh and want to solve his problems. But most importantly, you want to solve your own problems so they don’t weigh on him or the relationship…meaning you don’t just rely on him to fix stuff. You rely on him to support you and cheer you on while you fix stuff, and of course, you do the same for him.

great answer, mariposa.

I don’t think you really have to have “the one” because there isnt ONE. but there are people who you are more compatable with and when you find one its certainly something to hold on to. I would say to relax and enjoy what you have… let it be what it is and be happy with it.. Love yourself and find comfort from that then decide if this is a person you would like to move forward in life with… the “one” or “ones” don’t have to be a missing peice.. because its best to be whole on your own before entering a committed relationship.. look at it as two people who choose let their life paths intertwine.. partners, companions… then if you think that he might be someone you could live your life with in a partner ship then I suppose you have found the one.. given of course that he feels the same way.. if not, then it isnt something to take personl… you have to respect the other persons goals and feelings.. just like you would expect them to respect yours.. and sometimes respect can leave to an even deeper connection.. its normal to think about being with other people.. all you have to do is remind yourself of what you do have and ask yourself.. do i really want to risk losing what I have for something less certain, less fulfilling?