Love help: Abuisve and controlling boyfrien i want out - Help.com

you need to GET OUT! No-one who will hurt you emotionally or physical is worth your time. Cut all ties, and if needed go to the police. No-one has the right to treat you bad, let alone someone you love.
I’ll be thinking of you.

what an ***.. dont let urself get treated like that. if hes pulling that “if you love me do this” **** then no. you dont need to change anything for him. think about urself and what would happen if he wouldve gone futher. next time you talk to him tell him its over and totally end it. think about it, it can get worse…

You didn’t finish your story. You were supposed to tell us how after he pushed you down, you called the police and showed them how he pushed you down the stairs, and that they recommend that you file a restraining order on him, so that he cannot come with 500 yard of your house; let alone see you (except through binoculars!). You didn’t tell us that part. When where you going to tell us that part?

i didnt do anything yet im to scared

I understand that dear, but if you’re scared now can you imagine what he will be like later? Tell your Father for certain. Call the police. He should never have treated you like that…NEVER. You can’t keep this a secret, it will only get worse if you do.

i think he hear now and i dont know what to do

Right… do not let him in… lock all the doors and call the cops NOW.

My gf’s ex was like this.
She told her parents what was going on, so they could keep an eye out. And she left him. Tell your friends, so they can help keep an eye out for him, help keep you safe.
If you’re too scared to call the police, then don’t. Yet.
But leave him, take notes of anything he’s done so far, and if after you’ve dumped him he does anything else. Then call the police definitely. My gf never did call the cops, but i wish she had. almost 4 years after she left him, she’s still scared he’ll reappear and hurt her. Please don’t be like her; living your life in fear. You deserve better. Everyone does.

Cosmic Fool wrote:
you need to GET OUT! No-one who will hurt you emotionally or physical is worth your time. Cut all ties, and if needed go to the police. No-one has the right to treat you bad, let alone someone you love.
I’ll be thinking of you.

do this

yes, you need to get out, however, you need a plan first! A plan and a support group. You may think you can get out of this on your own, but he will try to find you if he is like all the other abusives jerks out there. Honey, I’ve been through this personally, if you want to talk more, please don’t hesitate to shout me! But PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! Get out of there as soon as possible!

goodness.. you should tell your parents about this if you haven’t already. that’s all i can think of right now. i hope that guy doesn’t come back :S

i broke up tih him this after noon and he sorta just slammed me into a wall and left

and now im really scared

you’ve done the best thing. tell your parents now if you haven’t yet. *hug* it will get better

i told my dad my mom lives like 30 minutes away and my dad i have no idea were he is

ok, tell close friends as well. But, likely he’ll get bored now…or soon and move onto someone else instead

all my friends are out of town i think the only one home is the neighbor in the aprtment downstairs i know she owns the building but im not sure what shes doing

WOW, WTF??!!?? OK, if you were undesirable in his eyes “he will be back” ??!!?? Yeah BS central babe. Not you , him! Yeah, “fun” how he made you feel bad about you. Frankly, I’m not laughing, may we say MENTAL ABUSE and get on with it? hehe. DO and be all that you want to. A DECENT significant other that loves you will so support that. give him the memo :)

Oh and just for laughs, because I do really care, when did you start dating “The Teminator” . Crap, I want to f\deal with that I’ll watch cable. :)) and yeah, I had thta fun little journey down the stairs. I’m here, k?

think Richard said it all :S get out and dont let him any where near you. If he comes any where near you scream :S he shouldnt be allowed to do that and get away with it. You need to tell some body official

even better, go to your town or city hall or courthouse and request a DOMESTIC RESTRAINING ORDER! They should give you one on the basis that you are afraid for your life. Not being over dramatic here, I’m being serious. You can just go down there and talk to the clerk of the court and ask him/her for the correct paperwork to fill out. You may have to go see a Judge, but trust me, most judges will grant it to you especially because 1) you’re a woman, 2) you’re afraid for your life, 3) if this guy has a history of this kind of crap, they will find it and it’ll be all the more reason for them to assist you with keeping this creepoid scumbag away from you. Please get some help, it’s the only way.

Well done on breaking up with him :) And now if he does anything more to you AT ALL go straight to the police and have him done for assault.

nikko wrote:
Oh and just for laughs, because I do really care, when did you start dating “The Teminator” . Crap, I want to f\deal with that I’ll watch cable. :)) and yeah, I had thta fun little journey down the stairs. I’m here, k?

You can totally deal with the terminator by encasing him in molten lava….I think that they sell this at wal-mart now. Just get a bucket and dump away. Hell, if he comes back around, I’ll help.

I need an adventure….

RUN honey run like the wind and never look back tell every neighbor you have and let them know th watch out for this guy do not talk to him ever he willtell you he will change he will promise you everything and after he thinks he has you again he will beat you againe trust me run honey RUN!!!!!

Seems to me a can of mace and a restraining order is called for here. Most men who abuse are only abusive till they are stood up to.

Just double check with your local police (get it in writing) that if he threatens you while violating the restraining order you can not be prosecuted or sued for macing the son of …..