Love help: It has come to my attention that there is innuendo I don’t want and now I might really need a break. - Help.com

yes, I’m going for a walk to clear my head hon. Then I want to tell you so much.

my dearests, I’m so super hurt. Wow you are! If i truly told you would you be there? I won’t do it in public because I’m stalked, but yeah drop me a line,i’ll reply

I will when I stop crying.

Hi everyone. I’m back and was running through my invites because they keep scrolling off. Now I’m about to get booted offline shortly because the network on my end is being worked on. Well, I will explain everything. I was away for a week, for a lot of reasons. I want to explain, but I have to be delicate about it. I’ll be on again in about 8 hours and will catch up with all of you. Thanks for replying and caring. I know I was vague on this.

ok, I’ve caught up on invites. Now I can just stay caught up and work on things that come by me on this site as part of the other stuff I do online. Anyway, well what happened is sort of funny to me now. I’m not sure how much I can say, but it did involve someone punching me. Yeah, it was shocking, but now I laugh about it. She was just upset and hurt I guess - never had THAT happen before. :)
I’m sort of over it now, but it was really shocking. She said a lot of hurtful things too. It was chaos and I was really shocked. I’m going to have to think about how to tell this story in a way that protects the privacy of others, but I can promise that I will not be running into any fists in the near future :)

“but” should be “and”
Laughing kills my grammar I guess. :)

Yes, it was quite a shock. She was a good friend and I understand her side, but there was a lot she didn’t know and to just get punched in the dark first thing was well, WOW. I’m obviously not really leaving anyone here, but I have to sit down and write this out calmly. I want to laugh it off but in many ways it is not so funny.
Epps, I have to run to the store before it closes, but if I can make the trip short I’ll be back tonight. My network is a little nutty after moving so I’m stuck depending on the coffee shop wireless for the next few days.

giorgi, I don’t have your email. :( Shout me, I’m here, just running out to the store…

Sad puppy dog eyes win me. You goof :) Okay, let’s try again. This is about no one that has ever passed through this site. Wow, for you *Bellatrix* and those that care. I’m about to bury this post in another merely to hide what I say about “mommy”, but well, mommy deserves her own post. It will be “juicy ” anyway. My mother is a freakazoid. We were in court together during the “happy holidays”.. Well, that’s way too close to home, good thing not even my parade of Ex’s know where I “live”. Freaks that take revenge because I don’t love them the way they wish, and worse take advantage of others who are legitimately hurting. It makes me sick, but I know that they were immensely heartbroken too. They can and should merely find another. It is a welcome relief but I will never say that to them. May I have permission to disengage my heart now? Thank the powers that be that they have never been on help. I don’t need that.
Wow, I have been estranged from my parents since I was 15 and worse, epps, these people do like what’s around me. One guy admitted it and I have used his exact words. No one knows anyway, so why do they bother - yet they see themselves in my words. This is about no one here or has crossed this site ever. A few of you know how to find me, its okay, it’s not you. I trust you if you know how to reach me and really, it’s not like you can’t find my email :) . Everyone here is welcome in my life. I’m just boohoo hurt about my stalkers. These people aren’t even members here, they merely know I reply here. I’m angry at them, but hey, if they want that work done, um, get off my friends :) . It sux. Perhaps these people need a hobby other than myself :) I measure my replies because my privacy has been really used as capital, and worse, it’s not even accurate. E.A.L. warned me, sigh, okay, so he’s doing the “I told you so” dance. What’s funny, I told them, “no more reading me or I won’t do as you request”. HA, they stopped, or at least pretended to. Yeah, those freaks need me. I did it to protect those I care about. What they want will not occur at the expense of those I have endeavored to protect.
Now, yet again, I’m shadowed by many and hidden by even more. They yet again throw me into planes and tell me what to do and where to go. They request matters that I take on in ways they will never know. They merely know it works. I should be writing this from Minnesota, but I asked to reply to them online. I doubt I can escape the LA trip - as usual, I must go, but well, okay. I love that city anyway. I hide out in the New Otani, but they always try to put me in the Westin. That was okay until people figured out where I was…It’s almost “home” now. If you are in LA just don’t be surprised if your bandwidth gets really nice for the next 3 days and a week after :)
myself and my 4000 closest friends will be around..HA :)
I request permission to weep openly. I ask for my humanity again. May I be sad/in a bad mood and still respected? May I request the compassion of my friends, can you feel okay asking for me and know that I will answer? They hate it that I reply here, as they wish for my attention. I have chosen something else that can include them, yet they want it ALL.
As I return to myself I grow increasingly less vernacular. Can you still “see” me anyway?

Well, okay. let’s do this simple. The cat got upset and relieved herself upon the sheets - I can sincerely understand . Gross, um okay. I returned to get her and well, I would have fixed it, but, punching me in the dark the first thing was not the answer. Well, thought we were not supposed to do that level of base behaviour in my world. How uncouth and rude! So she hits me, throws the cat at me, threatens to hold her for ransom (epps, medication anyone!!!??!!) and then pours her hurts out to me. Yeah, she got used by a lot of people. It wasn’t by me though. I suspect someday we will talk about it, but today is not the day, I have to pack for LA. I’m not going to be gone from all of you, just well, writing from my world. Hope it’s funny. I feel lonely someway. Good thing my computers are well or I’d lose it.

I’m hurt and scattered, but trying. I theoretically have “everything” , yeah, everything but the compassion I need. I feel sick. I haven’t eaten in 3 days. That is awful. I’m not like that normally. I will shake it off, but wow, bad day for sure.

There is more, but I’m trying to squeeze it out of me. At least I have money, am safe and in my own new place. It could be worse. I could have a harasser on this post, but YAY, i don’t :) Just good people trying to help ;)
Thanks, I’m trying, just a little skewed at the moment.

-n

you guys, I had a fever of 108 for the past few days. I don’t think I was okay then, I always get into self pity mode when that happens. I’m having dinner with one of my “evil” ex’s and getting back to normal. Love you all bunches.