Feel help: An old essay I wrote in Freshman English I. - Help.com

An old essay I wrote in Freshman English I.

Paper

Division and classification are a vital part of everyday life. Whether at the mall looking at the various shops, or at home sorting through old photographs, people divide and classify everything around them. It is a second nature, comparable to breathing, eating and sleeping. Nobody can keep from doing it. Sometimes it is even done subconsciously for quick reference. Simplicity is the goal of division and classification. Even simple things are classified though. Simple things ranging from windows to bottles, even to toilet paper are classified to make life easier.

Everyone uses the bathroom. It is an unavoidable part of life. Almost all bathrooms are equipped with the same supplies: the toilet, sink, soap, paper towels, and last but not least, toilet paper . After many years of going to different bathrooms, I have encountered many different types of toilet paper. Over my many years of going to the bathroom, I have used at least a thousand different toilets. I have become quite knowledgeable about different types of toilet paper and although I may not know all of the types of toilet paper , but I have experienced four different types. The types are newspaper, magical translucent, deep cleaning, and dreaded dissolving, based on the way they look, feel, how they come off the roll, where they can be found, and the preferred amount of paper to be used when it is time for usage.

Newspaper toilet paper gets its name because when it is being used, it makes the user wonder whether or not newspaper would be even a little bit softer. Newspaper toilet paper can be quite deceptive in its look. It may look high quality, but the lie can only last until the first touch. Immediately on first contact, the user realizes the horrible mistake they have made by not checking the toilet paper before using the restroom. This paper hates coming off the roll, and most of the time is not perforated, which forces the user to rip the paper at an odd place and have a torn piece at the end. This toilet paper feels similar to newsprint, and often leaves the person wishing they had never come to that restroom. Newspaper toilet paper is most commonly found in public schools. I advise the user to use as little of this paper as possible so as to avoid getting paper cuts.

While paper cuts are an issue with newspaper toilet paper, it is not to be feared with the next type of toilet paper. Magical translucent toilet paper gets its name because no matter how much of this paper is used, there never seems to be enough of it to satisfy the need of the person wiping with it. This is proven by the fact that this toilet paper always tears off every third sheet or so. This toilet paper also fools its user, but in a different way than the newspaper toilet paper. While still rolled up, this toilet paper looks like any other toilet paper . Once it is unrolled, however, the wiper discovers it is only a half ply thick, and he can see his hand through it. This paper isn’t gentle feeling, but it doesn’t feel like it will cut the user either. It is the even middle of toilet papers. The magical translucent toilet paper is most commonly found in gas stations, convenience stores, and restaurants. It can also be found in the second floor men’s bathroom of State Hall at the University of Central Arkansas. I advise using as much of this toilet paper as possible to avoid a messy situation.

Messy situations will never occur with the third type of toilet paper. The third type of toilet paper I have encountered is the deep cleaning toilet paper. This toilet paper gets its name from the deep down feeling of clean it leaves the user when the user has finished using it. This toilet paper is not deceptive in its appearance. Instead it screams its name loud and proud. The roll is often thicker, and the paper often has quilted designs on it. This paper feels soft and gentle. It is like a piece of heaven strung on a roll. Unless the user is too rough with it, it tears off of the roll perfectly. I have never seen such a work of art in a public place, however. If a person wants the joy of using this type of paper, she must buy it herself. I recommend using as little of this paper as possible because only a small amount is needed, and it is a rarity to be treasured if the user has it in a public place.

Treasured is the last word I would use to describe the last kind of toilet paper. The fourth and final type of toilet paper I have come across is the dreaded dissolving toilet paper . This type gets its name from the fact that it disintegrates in the middle of use. It looks a little like newspaper toilet paper, but it is a little bit thinner. It comes off of the roll easily enough, but then the ply proceeds to split in half. It feels like it is disappearing mid use, and that is due to the fact that it is. This type of toilet paper is dominantly found in natural food markets, such as Wild Oats in Tulsa. I recommend using as much of this toilet paper as possible at once so as to prevent any messes because of the large hole that will form during use.

Toilet paper, as simple as it is, can be divided and classified. The different ways I have divided it include the way it looks, feels, how it comes off of the roll, where it is located, and how much I recommend be used during each sitting. The names I have given these groups are newspaper toilet paper, magical translucent toilet paper, deep cleaning toilet paper , and the dreaded dissolving toilet paper. Everything in life is divided and classified. Even the dividers are divided. Division and classification makes everything in life simpler. It helps people to clarify and organize things.

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I hope the formatting doesn’t turn out as horrible as it is showing in the preview.

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Toilet, Newspaper, Toilet paper, paper, roll, Type, Feel, User (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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