life help: My father was admitted into the hospital a few weeks ago, for his heart and a bleeding ulser. - Help.com

im feeling for you..
you cant change things..and its best not to dwell on the past (him not in your life back then).

just try to remember all the amazing times you have had with him.

im not much help…but i tried..

You have my sympathy from the bottom of my heart. I can only imagine what it would be like to have something like that happen.

The most you can do now at the moment is to stick with your family members and cope through this hard time together.

I’m sorry I’m not much of a help…

I am very sorry for your loss. My thoughts would be that you won’t be able to figure out how you feel,what you,think,what it means or what now this soon afterward. I do think that holding on to that thought of your last conversation is nothing but a good thing, and I am sure that he is very glad that he was able to say that one more time. I agree that you can’t change the past, and dwelling on that will not do you any good, and that getting together with family for support would be helpful. One thing you might try if you feel that there are things you should have said to him, or wanted to say to him, is try writing him a letter. Perhaps you could send it up in a balloon as a symbol of sending your thoughts to him or keep it and read it or add to it as you like.

It’s good advice not to dwell on the past. What’s done is done, and the hardest part of it all will be learning to accept this. You cannot change what has happened, but you can change what will happen. Do take some time to grieve, your heart needs it. Losing someone so suddenly like that is difficult, but I promise you it will get easier as they days go by. You’ll never forget him, but the pain will ease and you’ll be able to smile again, and I’m sure thats what he would want to see. You’ll be okay, just try to let time heal these wounds.

I am very sorry for your loss. My father died when I was 19 and there are still days when I miss him.

What you are feeling is normal. when a loved one dies, we wish our relationship with them had been better, we had spent more time with them, we think there is more we could have done.

What you are supposed to do is what you are doing. You are letting your emotions out. There is no right or wrong way to grieve.

It will take time for your emotions to heal from the loss, so don’t be impatient with yourself.

http://www.hospicenet.org/html/grief_…

whenever you feel like it, please consider giving the above link a look. I hope it helps.

I know exactly what you’re going through- the same happened to my father a few years ago. It’s perfectly normal to feel the way you do, but remember that it’s not your fault that you never got to spend time with each other when you were younger. Focus on the good times you had together, and remember that he did love you, and you loved him. Death always feels like the be all and end all for the person grieving, but haven’t dealt with it a few times, I know that the pain eventually disappears. There are councillors out there who deal specially with grief of a loved one passing, I’ve visited one myself, and talking really did save me. Remember the good, don’t dwell on the bad in the past, those memories will only get you down.

I am so very sorry!!!! I just lost my Dad too Beginning of July. I didn’t know the depth of sadness and loss I would feel.
The fact that you didn’t spend the amount of time you wanted when you were young was out of your control. So think of the good times you did get to spend with him.
It is nice you had a chance to talk to him, hold on to that conversation and hearing him tell you he loved you. It’s good you are seeking help from kind people.

happitch wrote:
Death always feels like the be all and end all for the person grieving, but haven’t dealt with it a few times, I know that the pain eventually disappears.

*having dealt with it.
Appologies.