Year help: I hate my dreams

Alexaxas

I hate my dreams

dark, desperate, terrifying ordeals, things I can’t forget even when I’m awake, glaring into my mind when I shut my eyes
or worse
dreams about other lives, better lives, things I can’t ever have, glimpses of happiness
vivid memories diverging from history, old faces made new again
things I never want to wake up from, always cut short, never more than half remembered shadows
days, weeks, whole years and lifetimes go by
when I wake up, sometimes, I can’t tell, can’t understand why things are different
I wander in a daze for minutes, maybe hours, before I can sort the dream from reality
forever on the edge of memory
recalled by old songs, conversations overheard in passing, the casual lean of an object, or a wrinkle in the bedspread
only rising to mock me

This open post was written 4 years, 10 months ago | V/U/S: 2,394, 7, 6 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post Alexaxas may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. Alexaxas is a verified member, has been around for 5 years and has 6 posts and 388 replies to their name.

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Eye, Mind, Dream, happiness, history, memory, Reality, Year, Day, song (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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jaizon 0 #
Tollered, 28, SE | 4 years, 10 months ago (19 minutes after post)

Dreams as I understand it is a inner ordeal that our brain is trying to sort out when we reboot (sleep)
You write beutifully btw….
Personally i have grown used to dark dreams, and at this stage they no longer bother me…
Perhaps read some shamanic books about it… Could be informative :)
Or maybe read up on lucid dreaming and try to learn to do that, nothing like having the power to change ones dreams…

good luck :)

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Rand0 9 #
An Unknown Location | 4 years, 10 months ago (2 hours, 58 minutes after post)

Wow - this is so interesting.
You do write well, but I think you have to communicate a little more.
I remember a brief time in my life when I had these type of -”situation” - which I couldn’t get out of and I really felt suicidal for a few days/weeks/ - the pain was really intense and my dreams were like - well, really similar to what you’re describing -
Go for it - explain yourself, as much as you can. What helped me in the end was just “UNLOADING” all that stuff, whether it was true or false or unknown or whatever, in the end, I just had to let it go so I could sleep - so go on, if you need to, open up.

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Alexaxas 1 #
An Unknown Location | 4 years, 10 months ago (7 hours, 7 minutes after post)

My ‘bad’ dreams are vague at best and not very common; only an issue if I set off the neighbors by shouting at three in the morning.

It’s the ‘good’ dreams, and to a lesser extent the ‘neutral’ ones, that make me want to carve out the part of my brain that’s responsible. Dreaming about how awesome it would be to have things that I can’t ever have does not make my waking life easier.

I write down the dreams I can recall clearly, the non-incriminating ones, anyway. What really irks me, looking at those, is that my subconscious’s credentials seem to be a mix of film-school drop-out and bad ‘family television’ writer. The symbolism is either so simple and saccharine that it requires no analysis or so surreal and obscure that none is available.

A friend of mine has a few books on dream symbolism that I’ve leafed through in the past. When I dream about my memory failing and my cell phone catching fire when a girl asks for my number, well, I don’t need a book for that. It’s pretty obvious. But none of those books give the slightest indication what hauling a barrel of ‘plutonium’ (which, of course, looks like hard cubes of green jello) around and shooting a guy for stealing a handful is about.

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SheepCat 37 #
An Undisclosed Location | 4 years, 9 months ago (5 days, 18 hours after post)

i know how you feel about those dreams. They’re so scary, but you find yourself wanting to go back to them.
I once had a dream about my ex, who i hated, and we were back together, and it actually scared me so bad that i wanted to go back when I woke up, when I did, he was pleading with me to forgive him…since then, I’ve dreamt about him everynight until one day I did. they stopped then.
Dreams are basically just a part of your subconcious bringing forth issues weighing on your mind so much that you dont even realize until you close you eyes and let your thoughts flow. Don’t let your dreams control you. Write them down and try to make connections to them. Good luck and sleep well

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annetteholme #
An Unknown Location | 4 years ago (9 months, 2 weeks after post)

Wonderful writing. I have similar dreams. I’ve always had them, but I now think my blood pressure and cholesteral meds are making them worse. Much to the dismay of my kids, I’m eliminating them one at a time to find the culprit. I know that Trazadone is one.

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I hate my dreams

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