friends help: closed - Help.com

Hi fever…sorry about your loss

They don’t, they just don’t know what else to day or they don;t want to hurt your feelings

oh bummer…that sucks

you will be alright, sounds like she wasn;t worth your time anyways

these girls that want to be ‘just friends’ are probably just going from guy to guy, not wanting a serious relationship themselves and messing everyone about. don’t take it personally. it happens to lots. and it just so happens you keep attracting these girls. erm…maybe reconsider who you go for next time?

it’s okay. so like, what exactly do you need help with?
getting over her? making her sound like she’s a slug to be stamped on? (not that i would but…)

lol, was that supposed to be your message to your invites?

get a life mate - no woman is worth worrying about!

My advice is to cut off all contact with her, at least for now. Usually they only want to “still be friends” just in case they want something from you in the future.

That’s so right jcd

Fever Dream wrote:
somehow i really don’t want to think i would fall for a girl that would tell me that just in case they need a favor

No one wants to think they are that way, but it still happens all the time. You need to find yourself a hobby, something just for you that is independent of a relationship. People who focus everything on their relationship and nothing else crash harder when the relationship fails. People who have something else to focus on tend to be able to move on easier when a relationship fails. A relationship should enhance your life, not define it.

pff, i hate my life always. but there’s always the future to look forward to!! forget the past, it’s not worth dwelling over.

Listen mate, life is what you make it. Ask yourself, what do you want out of your life, do you believe you deserve what life is throwing at you. If you do, you’ll get more of the same. Change the way you think.

In life your a winner or a loser. Why are winners, winners?

Because they believe in them selves

Fever Dream, maybe you need to take a break from relationships. Why don’t you just…concentrate on getting friends and partying and having fun with friends. you may be moving into relationships too fast, maybe that’s the problem.

lol, well it does seem like it then. so, now you know what the problem is, work from that. change how you go about it. if you see a girl you like, you don’t have to pounce there and then. just wait and see if your paths cross again. watch out for signs! that sounds so daft, i know, but it might work! it’s worth a shot.

anyway, i gotta go. shout me if you want. =)
see ya later.

Why would you need a girl to be happy?

Just be honest with her and tell her you don’t wish to be “friends” you have already excepted it’s over. Be kind to yourself and move on.

Fever Dream wrote:
I don’t NEED a girl to be happy. But life with a girl is like Double happy.
I plan to never talk to her ever again ever.

Not always the best idea… Girls talk, and news spreads. I would stay -ish friends with her… Not the kind of friend that will always be by her side if she is having a bad day, unless you want to get back together with her.

I think you should just get over her, find a new girl. Or live your life as yourself. Maybe just live a little while, going day by day as a single open man, before you get into another heavy relationship.
Now, I’m no relationship expert, but I do know that too much of a good thing isn’t good. So, even though being with a girl is ‘Double happy’ maybe you should just settle with being ‘happy’ for a little while…

A quicklist…
-Stay away from that type of girl, find the ones that are more like you.
-When things seem to be going badly, tell the girl to ‘take a short break’ just to get some space, and not let her (or you) be so cramped.
-Don’t let the girls be the strong one. I’m not saying “Quick, dump her before she dumps you!” just don’t give her any reason too dump you. Be the man she wants you to be.
Idk… Again, not much of a relationship expert here. XP

Yeah. =/ That seems to be a huge problem with everyone…

Haha, trust me, the system crumbled a long time ago. It’s the peoples problem, always trying to be with the ones they shouldn’t for some unknown reason… :P

Yeah, most likely. If you put up with the loneliness for a time, you will find a better girl. Patience is the key to everything.

I only have a minute to post Fever, but I think you’re giving your heart away too completely and too quickly in your relationships. Hold back on falling head over heels next time. Don’t hand over your heart until you’ve verified that she is in the relationship for the long haul. That will save you the heartache you’ve experienced in past relationships. I don’t know how long you and this gf were together, but waiting several months before handing over your heart completely is always a good idea.

^Good advice.
Some girls (especially younger ones) Aren’t looking for a relationship partner, they are just looking for a temporary lover, and they will break away from you for no particular reason. They are just looking for excitement in their lives. Nothing to be taken personally.

Sometimes a change of thought is in need of order. Figure out what it is you are looking for and force yourself to be true to it.

If she f**ked another guy, she obviously isn’t the right one for you, and you should be happy you’re away from a b*tch like her. All I can say is that you need to find your hobbies and girls who are like you.

A hobby is just something that interests you. You don’t know what interests you?

Not girls who like you, girls who *ARE* like you. If you get hobbies, you’ll get them.

boyy you need to get on aim so i can talk to you about all this stuff i missed!
i miss youuuu :)