Love help: Need some advice. - Help.com

Problems with Myspace.com, Friendster or Bebo.com?

Generally speaking, if you are having issues with those sites it is best to contact their support staff directly. These links can get you started:

Myspace Support, Friendster Support and Bebo Support

If you are trying to access these services from your school and are blocked, we suggest you abide by the schools rules while you utilize the schools equipment.

Note: I’m a robot that the Help.com staff created. If this response is in error, I apologize, please ignore it.

If its killing you inside, respond. You don’t have to leave yourself open to get hurt again. Just a quick “Hi” every now and again, so that you are not ignoring her. Keep things superficial, and you both protect yourself, while not having the guilt of ignoring her.

Don’t worry about what you’ve said, to her or yourself. Do what gets you through the day with the least pain. I find its the best way of living.

You’re wondering if you should give her the respect and respond? You should give her as much respect as she gave you when she cheated on you. None. She doesn’t deserve it. In my opinion, you should continue to ignore her and even block her from sending you messages through IM and myspace (if that’s possible, I don’t use myspace). And you shouldn’t feel bad about it. She brought it on herself. But this is just my opinion.

well i think you should find out what she wants from you that she keeps messeging you and everything and see if you can find out what is going on with her recently. but before all of that it depends on how long you guys were going out for. also did u really trust her to begin with. you have to think that through. i mean ask yourself if you want to put yourself in that same situation again. let me if that was good advice for you. good luck to you

from a girls view..
reply to her telling her EXACTLU how you feel..
dont hide NOTHING….
then say if you dont understand where im coming from then bye

Kiddkaos - We were going out for six years before all of this happend, and yeah, I honestly really did trust her because she never did anything to betray my trust at all. We started dating fairly young but our relationship grew into when we became moderate adults, graduating high school and going to college and whatnot. Yeah I sorta want to find out what she wants from me, but at the same time I can’t help but feel as if she’s glad I’m not talking to her, but still she sends these messages.

JCD- I know what you mean. The thing is, she didn’t physically cheat on me she just started talking to some guy on the internet and apparently fell in love with him. They have yet to meet in person as well. I’ve had the thoughts of completely blocking her out like that too, but it’s just like I dunno.. I don’t want to be a d!**** I guess.

Physical or emotional, cheating is cheating.

Yeah that’s how I considered it basically.

If you don’t want to talk to her, then maybe it would be a good idea to reiterate that point. Just let her know that you aren’t ready to be fiends with her right now, and that you need to have space with no contact from her and give her a time limit like “Please, don’t contact me for 2 months while I come to terms with everything that happened.” If she can’t respect something like that then you might just have to continue ignoring her until she gives up.

Do what you feel comfortable with. Your happiness is in your hands, gotta make a decision.

If you would rather block her out completely, go for it. She cheated on you, a fresh start might be a good thing. There is nothing to feel guilty about.

But if you know you *will* feel guilty, and bad, about ignoring her. Then talk to her. Like I said before, you can always keep things superficial. Just the niceties. Or if you feel you want a release, tell her exactly how you feel. Or tell her you don’t want her messaging you.

Whatever you choose, make sure you have your own happiness in mind. Your hurting, so I think its best to look out for number one right now.

I’ve just been debating on saying something like “not to be a jerk or anything, but you sort of made your point that you didn’t want to be friends with me anymore so that’s why I said good bye.. why the sudden trying to contact me?” and reply to what she was saying, pretty much just leaving it at that.

Dude, I believe after going through a traumatic event like someone cheating on you, you definitively need some time alone. It must hurt a lot. Im sure your heart is not healed from what she did, so give your heart time. Then and only then can you truly be friends. I think you should let her know that you need time to yourself and that you are truly hurt. After what she did to you, the least she can do is give your heart a little rest. Good luck Pal.

Yeah, that’s what I’ve been trying to do sort of, just clear my mind of things. It’s just hard because I still think of her a lot and the most thing, wondering if I should say anything to her. Plus I had a dream about her the other day which sort of kicked me back to the start because it was a great dream. Geh. College starts again soon and I think that once I’m back in that environment I should be all right hopefully, but I don’t know.

well i understand where your coming from as far as bein a D. but i’ll tell you one thing relationships aren’t easy and as far as you right now i think then main problem is myspace and the iternet. i had the same problem with my girl. i was constantly on her page seeing who friend requested her and stuff, but try and have a talk with her. see how you guys feel about each other and maybe who knows maybe she’ll tell you something or if you see her act different towards you then you ask her why are you acting weird all of a sudden. don’t be afraid to be a little bit angry with her. she has to understand your side. just make sure you are calm when you talk to her don’t get to upset. i hope that helps you out

i think you should respond to the messages. she may not be mad at you for no reason, ask her whats wrong, even if its in a humorous way. yes, i would assume she is just contacting you because you said you wouldnt, once or twice i have made up a stupid reason to be mad at a girl, and then say im not talking to her just to get her to contact me more…..i dont think she would hold it against you as “breaking your word” if you contacted her, as forgiving people and realizing you made a mistake while you were mad isnt lying or breaking your word….

Just as an update, I wound up sending her a message. I asked her sort of in a stuble tone how come she had been contacting me and such that because she made it clear she didn’t want to talk to me anymore. I responded to the things she had said on her past messages and I just told her how I was doing because she kept asking and saying “hope you’re doing all right.” I know she read the message, but I have yet to check for a response. I’ll let you guys know how it went.