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I have a problem.

I told a good guy friend that I liked him (like that) because I did and do still. Since then we have become very close best friends. We know each other really well now and find great comfort in hanging out and talking. The problem developed from there. Comforting came in the form of hand holding and hugging, sneaking out to talk…. etc. Nothing to bad except he has a girlfriend. and she doesn’t know. about how much we hang out. She and I have been friends for six years, but have just repaired a falling out from this past year. I’m going to talk to her this weekend… how much to I tell her? everything or nothing?

This closed post was written 1 year, 4 months ago | V/U/S: 165, 9, 5 | Edit Post | Report Post


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friends, Hanging, hand, Find, Physical intimacy, form, speech, Like That, girlfriend, Weekend (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

Replies (9)

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Anonymous edited this post 1 year, 4 months ago. Read the previous text »

I have a problem. I told a good guy friend that I liked him (like that) because I did and do still. Since then we have become very close best friends. We know each other really well now and find great comfort in hanging out and talking. The problem developed from there. Comforting came in the form of hand holding and hugging, sneaking out to talk…. etc. Nothing to bad except he has a girlfriend. and she doesn’t know. about how much we hang out. I’m going to talk to her this weekend… how much to I tell her? everything or nothing?

optimismiles offline Verified User (2 years, 6 months) Long Term User Shouts: 4 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (9 minutes after post)

this will make me sound like a bad person, but just tell her nice things about her boyfriend. and that you’re close with him. she doesn’t need to know about something you HOPE will happen, but HASN’T happened yet. after all, even though you and this boy are close, you’re just friends.

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Help me with: hieveryone.
Neutra offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 87 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (11 minutes after post)

Tell all but tell a little at a time, telling all at once could be a little much for her to handle.

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Help me with: What i’ve learned this year
Anonymous #
1 year, 4 months ago (13 minutes after post)

SO you betrayed your girl friend for a guy?

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shellyburr3 offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (15 minutes after post)

Honestly , You just had a falling out with her , if it was your fault she will never trust you again , and if it was her fault then shell just think this is payback in some way. I dont think you should bring her into anything , even when you dont know exactly whats going on with him and yourself. If he has a girlfriend and is holding your hand and she knows nothing about you to being “so close” then either hes not so into her and it shouldnt matter and your letting youself be the girl he hides and keeps a secret. Or you make a choice, her or him. as much as it sucks, its all you can do! 3 goodluck !!

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SlightlyUnique offline Verified User (1 year, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 6 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 4 months ago (6 hours, 12 minutes after post)

the rule i would use here is - if the situations were reversed - what would you really want to know, and how would you react?

personally, i would expect her to go a bit mad, and it could break the freindship… Now… i know its petty. and i know you said nothing has happened, but she will most likely make the assumption things might/will/have - after all, you haven’t told her this til now, what else are you hiding…

The reason i belive that is because you have had a falling out recently, so it shows the freindship isn’t currently on the terms of trust with no reservations (to be honest, few ever get to that level)

so.. personally, i would stay quiet - but never actually lie to her - if he asks you directly, how close you are, tell her - but only tell her if she asks direct questions - i wouldn’t volunteer the information…

but thats just me…

everyone else has valid points of view too…

good luck!

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Anonymous #
1 year, 4 months ago (12 hours, 43 minutes after post)

What is Wrong with the world, why do we have to lie and cheat.
This is a so called friend? and shes seeing her friends Boyfreind!
Be a REAL WOMEN and make the choice, of her or him? But if he cheated on her do you really think that he’ll never cheat YOU!!!

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