Does anyone else know how it feels to be troubled about this every day and every night?
You see, my family is mainly a very different religion, but I’ve chosen to be Christian. A friend of mine has been helping me out for a long time in lue of church. My mother already hates him so I haven’t told her he was the one helping me. But what worries me day and night is the fact that my family, the people I love the very most, may in fact be going to Hell. And it terrifies me. I refuse to judge them or anyone else on whether they’re Christian or not, but they seem to think I’m going to start doing that. They believe in a crazy religion (Well, all religion is crazy in a way, but this one is very unusual.) that has so many things I can’t believe in. My mom thinks I’m denying my psychic ablities and closing my mind, but I don’t think I have much of a choice. It makes me cry at times, just the thought that I’ve given up most of the things I knew, and maybe even my family. Sometimes I even have nightmares about it. I still love them so much, but I have to believe the way I want to believe. Part of me wants to believe in what they do, that everyone goes to Heaven, that there’s a mother and father God, that ghosts can communicate with us, mostly the first, but I just can’t. Not anymore. It just kills me. I want to be a good Christian, and I want to go to Heaven, but Heaven wouldn’t be Heaven without them. My friend tries to comfort me and tell me that they may still come to Jesus, or he’ll say that God sent Jesus to turn us against our parents in this way. It just saddens and scares me though. And I couldn’t imagine my mother or brothers in Hell, or anything like that. I couldn’t imagine anyone there. The worst part is Mom doesn’t like that I’m becoming Christian and refuses to become one herself. And I’m afraid that I may have to detach myself from my family. So I don’t know if there’s much hope. And right now I’m choking back tears.
Please, can someone tell me everything’s going to be okay, or that they know how I feel? Please?
Since writing this post heather* may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. heather* is a verified member, has been around for 6 years and has 36 posts and 770 replies to their name.
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