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Note: I’m a robot that the Help.com staff created. If this response is in error, I apologize, please ignore it.
im sorry to hear that and I honestly dont know what to say.
maybe you should give the number HelpBot posted a call? its not just for people who are suicidal, they can probably help you a lot more then anyone here.
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why should i kill myself thats an horrible thing to say
aw im really sorry i know its gonna be hard but have u got any1 u can talk to it about family friends etc
maybe going back to college will help ease your mind
dont listen to them(12309) they’ve being saying to to loads of people
hope you feel better soon
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nikki157 wrote:
why should i kill myself thats an horrible thing to say
You shouldn’t. Ignore that person they obviously have no compassion and aren’t taking this seriously. They will be banned soon I have reported them.
-Nikki, what methods have you been trying to get through this? Like what kinds of things have you been doing?
Grief is a hard thing, but I want to tell you that the way you are feeling, and the thoughts you are having are extreemly normal.
The best healer for grief is time, which can be hard. But you need to find out ways to keep on going, until eventually without realising it-It will get better.
It will be a good thing to go back to school. It will get your mind off of that.
Nikki, apologize to that you had to read that comment.
My grandfather killed himself and time will take care of it…if it gets too bad, talk too a counselor. How old are you Nikki?
logout invited 7 users to read this post 3 months ago.
Thank you Ella! Good job!
First of all, you should simply ignore 12309. He doesn’t even have the stones to insult people with his real name, so he can go die in a fire. :)
As for your problem, I highly recommend you go back to school, whether you want to or not. Though it may not seem like it now it’ll help clear your mind a bit!
Ell♥ wrote:
nikki157 wrote:
why should i kill myself thats an horrible thing to say
You shouldn’t. Ignore that person they obviously have no compassion and aren’t taking this seriously. They will be banned soon I have reported them.-Nikki, what methods have you been trying to get through this? Like what kinds of things have you been doing?Grief is a hard thing, but I want to tell you that the way you are feeling, and the thoughts you are having are extreemly normal.The best healer for grief is time, which can be hard. But you need to find out ways to keep on going, until eventually without realising it-It will get better.
I have reported them 3 times. ^^
Now just think of all the good things in life. That is what i do when i feel down, Helps me out a lot. So ill pass my secret to you ^^ Use it well!
u see the thing is that when i got his message i went to his house to check on him but all the light were off so i didnt knock on the door but i did see somthing swinging through the bathroom window and just though it was my eyes playing tricks on me and the day after i found out he had hung himseft from the loft which was in the bathroom and what really upset me was that it was a stranger who found him and all i keep thinking is that what if i could have saved him.
Most colleges have counseling departments where you can get a referral to get someone to talk to about this without it costing you anything. So definitely plan on doing that once you get back to school. Don’t be afraid to talk to your friends and family about how you feel. I know you said that you feel like it’s not your fault, and you are absolutely right. But knowing that on a conscious level and preventing yourself from running all the woulda, coulda, shoulda in your mind are two different things. Time will help you with this, but you need to talk to someone, too.
Thats terrible. You should definatly seek counseling about that.
Ya see a counselor ASAP! I hope that helps!
nikki157 wrote:
u see the thing is that when i got his message i went to his house to check on him but all the light were off so i didnt knock on the door but i did see somthing swinging through the bathroom window and just though it was my eyes playing tricks on me and the day after i found out he had hung himseft from the loft which was in the bathroom and what really upset me was that it was a stranger who found him and all i keep thinking is that what if i could have saved him.
If you already saw him swinging…then he was already gone. I’m sorry. It would have been too late. I know its really REALLY painful, and difficult to understand. But theres nothing you could have done to prevent, stop or save this situation.
You must have been an amazing person for your grandad to have left you the message. He must of had held a high opinion of you. Did he explain why he did it? I understand that may be quite personal so please don’t feel you HAVE to answer. But if you feel it would help your welcome to talk to us here.
There’s no minimum or maximum age for counseling, and you deserve counseling because of what you’ve experienced. It’ll help, most likely.
Just remember that it’s not your fault, and that the reality of it is no matter how much you go through the “what if” crap it’s not changing anything. It’s totally not worth it.
Please forgive me, I was just reading your post - Plus the other inserts’ above.
Ignorance is very shameless, and seemingly you have been engaged it tonight with the fool above (A).
The loss you have suffered is a great burden on your soul, and a weight that you need to get lifted from your shoulders’. My heart is is with you tonight. Please seek either spiritual or medical advice - Don’t allow sorrow to steal your education.
he wasn’t really close to alot of our family over the last three years as he left my gran after having a afair and he went really weired and so we stopped talking to him but i never stopped but some people since he died have said some horried things to me and my family like we souldn’t be sad and to top it all off it made all the papers and people who new him when he left my gran have sold there storys to pappers and have mad our family look evil and like we didnt care so there is no escape from it
It’s good for you to grieve - Don’t allow your sorrow to consume you.
I’m afraid since I’m coming in this late, since I can’t read all the replies, I’m at risk of repeating what has been already said, so please forgive me if I do.
I’d like to say that priorities in life are always hard to access during bad times. So I’d like to just start off and say, that when something like this happens, no one will begrudge you for taking a semester off school to get yourself back together.
With that said, I also understand the fear that this may take over your life. It is where your nightmares are coming from, the trauma of such a thing happening is something, that if not dealt with, can emerge in dangerous ways.
Take a semester off school, and as a victim of PTSD, I’d suggest finding a councilor you trust, talk with them and talk with us. Talk is what you need right now, and with that you’ll come to understand everything that is confusing and overwhelming you.
Keep your head up and keep talking. Shout me anytime.
When my grandfather killed himself, had to keep allowing my mind to think about the goodtimes and those good memories to consume my thinking. That is not easy, but we must try and cherish the goodtimes and not allow one event to destroy the good memories of our loved ones.
Thought if you were still in school, you could talk to one your conselors or teachers.
My heart goes out to you and please keep in touch.
his message just said that he loved us all and that he wanted us to know and asked me to pass this on to the others, but he left nothing behind we emptied his house and anything which could have explained why had gone his post old files all that was left was his bed and clothes etc everyone i have spoken to says he was fine the night he died and what makes it more confusing is that the night he died he took a large amount of money out of the bank which has now vanished
Now, that is makes it suspicious my friend. What did the police say?
nothing as we cant prove he didnt give it to someone on the way home but ive just thought about this . when the police found him there were pills all over the place and we though at first that he tolk the pills and then hung himself but it turns out he never took the tablets and they didnt even belong to him and the police didnt even know they werent his till we told them
Is the investigation ongoing or closed?
Nikki, you do have a lot to put up with. Have you considered talking to a grief counciller?
Right Ell…they need to do more investigation here…sounds fishy too me!
Nikki, how much money are we talking about?
Nikki, there is something that is not right here. People who are intent upon suicide don’t withdraw large amounts of money from the bank–unless they planned to give it to someone. Did he have a lady in his life at the time of his death? Those pills had to belong to SOMEONE. Were there any prescription bottles around with someone else’s name on them? Were they narcotics? I am also troubled that he would hang himself if he DID have pills he could have overdosed on. And if he did NOT take them, why were they all over the floor? I think the police need to get “Lestrade” off the case and get some professional detectives.
The fact that money was taken out of his bank account just before his death points to something other than a suicide. The message he left on your phone could have been made under duress. I would hypothesize that he was induced to take money out of his account, and that he was very possibly induced to make that call to your answering machine. At what time did the call come in? And do the police know about the call?
Yes, it COULD have been a suicide, but some things just do not add up. I would think a person would leave a suicide note, rather than making a phone call . . . and I would think he would have had to make that phone call when he KNEW you wouldn’t be able to answer it. And SOMEBODY got that money . . . how much time from the withdrawal until his death?
Hi Nikki,
Im so sorry for what you are painfully going through. I agree with something does not sound right. This sounds very fishy and needs to be investigated more thouroughly. I think it would be good for you to go back to school and concentrate on your life ahead. There is nothing more you can do for him now. He knows you loved him. Except, put people back on this case that seems to be handled sloppy. May he rest in peace and I send peace and love to you.
I am so sorry you had to read rude posters at such a sad time in your life. I dont understand being mean for no reason to people in pain especially. Im sorry you had to read them.
he took the money about two hours before he died and the call was 1 hour and 15 we think before he died. and as for a girlfriend he did have one a few months back but they had split but she was like 20 years younger and they had been having some verry public arguments and he had sent some really weired messages to her a few days before he died
So are the police still investigating or have they closed the case? Because it looks like they need to keep searching for answers.
they have closed the case and say theres nothing else they can do we just need to try and move on
time.heals.all.wound wrote:
they have closed the case and say theres nothing else they can do we just need to try and move on
How do you know?
It is very unlikely that your grandfather could have spent a large amount of cash just two hours before his death. If he withdrew it voluntarily, he could have given it to homeless people, or more likely, to a certain lady friend. If he withdrew it under duress, then whoever made him withdraw the money was a killer. I hope the police are savvy enough to get the videotape from the camera at the Automatic Teller Machine, if the ATM was so equipped. That could provide some vital clues. The police also need to determine the origin of the pills found around him. A toxicology report should have been prepared by the coroner to determine if poisons or narcotics were in his body. I do NOT believe that pills would be found around him if he had not taken some of them–voluntarily or involuntarily. There are only two possibilities: (1) he was forced to take sedatives so that his killer or killers could more easily hang him, or (2) he voluntarily took the pills to ease–and perhaps doubly guarantee–his own death. The latter scenario is not a likely one: you can simply overdose on pills without having to undergo death by hanging. If the authorities have NOT peformed a toxicology report, they have not done their job. I suggest that a senior family member make an appointment with the chief of police and demand answers to the questions above.
Hello,
I plead to you on behalf of help.com, the world and Ireland not to kill yourself, I know it seems hard having lost someone close to you, but please remember, that you are very important to us, otherwise we would not have replied to this post, oh no we wouldn’t have, you loved your grandfather very much, but he would not want you to kill yourself, he would love for you to enjoy the rest of your life in peace and harmony!
Nikki157, that was very sloppy on the part of the police. There is simply
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