Love help: Alright, the typical “i fell in love with my best friend” case…well, i’ve become really good friends with this girl, Carly. - Help.com



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Alright, the typical “i fell in love with my best friend” case…

well, i’ve become really good friends with this girl, Carly. It started out when we were both depressed and walked out of different classes at the same time. One of our mutual friends made a comment that we should go be depressed together, and it just kinda took off from there…we’ve helped each other through a lot (i at one point had gotten so bad that i was having sucidial thoughts…i told her and she convinced me the hard way that it wasnt worth it, and that if she didnt care about me she would’ve bothered to say anything) and i had grown feelings for her…i convinced my feelings to go away, not wanting to ruin this wonderful friendship…then i told her that i had felt like tha but had gotten over it…well i’ve got those feelings again and im afraid to tell her about it…we’ve become so close so fast and i dont want to ruin it…any advice?

This open post was written 2 months, 4 weeks ago | V/U/S: 243, 10, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Boric offline Verified User (1 year, 3 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
Somerville, MA, US | 2 months, 4 weeks ago (2 minutes after post)

I say hint at it, kinda beat around the subject. If she catches on and is interested she’ll push it farther, if not…then you haven’t lost anything.

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Anonymous #
2 months, 4 weeks ago (14 minutes after post)

Well i did at first, but she had been stuck on this guy, so i assumed the best friend position…and whenever i told her she was like OH MY GOD im so sorry for talking about him to you! idk if that changes the situation or not…

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Anonymous #
2 months, 4 weeks ago (14 minutes after post)

oh she’s trying to getting over the guy now…im forgetful lol…

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Boric offline Verified User (1 year, 3 months) Long Term User Shouts: 3 #
Somerville, MA, US | 2 months, 4 weeks ago (18 minutes after post)

Anonymous wrote:
Well i did at first, but she had been stuck on this guy, so i assumed the best friend position…and whenever i told her she was like OH MY GOD im so sorry for talking about him to you! idk if that changes the situation or not…

Well in that case, she obviously knows you have feelings for her. Which is most likely because you have shown aggression or a distaste for the guy she is in to. Well, if that is true then she must make her own choices. Just be yourself, if shes into you then it will work out, if not shes still your best friend which might not occur if you try to interfere and or persuade her.

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Anonymous #
2 months, 4 weeks ago (20 minutes after post)

haha the guy is actually a friend of mine so their wasnt distaste…but thanks for your help! a few of my friends have said similar things…thank you very much!

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Anonymous #
2 months, 4 weeks ago (4 hours, 57 minutes after post)

Most of the time, girls won’t go into relationships with best friends, because we’re afraid to lose what we already have. It’s like chasing a goose when you already have a duck. Take the chance and lose both? Or stay with what you have?

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mar98 offline Verified User (8 months, 1 week) Long Term User Shouts: 7 #
Dracut, MA, US | 2 months, 4 weeks ago (22 hours, 15 minutes after post)

No, I don’t think it’s because they are afraid to lose what they have.
I think it’s simply because they don’t feel any attraction towards em.
If you were “into” your best guy friend it wouldn’t matter..you would
want to lose the “best friend” status for something more.

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Anonymous #
2 months, 4 weeks ago (1 day, 2 hours after post)

No, that “best friend” status is too important to lose. Once you’ve had a taste of something more, then had a falling out, you’re never best friends anymore. Most times you rarely get along again because there’s that uncomfortable barrier of knowing far too much of someone else.

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bitemenow0 offline Unverified User #
An Unknown Location | 1 month, 2 weeks ago (1 month, 1 week after post)

I am kinda in the same situation as you exept i am a girl. i can help you here most girls end up liking their best friend or even falling in love with them in my case i fell in love. If you two are best friends you can talk about it together and if she happens to have feelings for you, you need to have a long talk before you decide to do anything that no matter what happens you will still be best friends and nothing changes.if you two are really close it should all be based on understanding trust and love. i will admit i love my best friend and he loves me back we just have not gone at it yet but it the long shot statistics say 80% of best friends fall in love and get married, part of me wishes that me and my best friend forest will be part of the 80%. best of luck with you and your best friend in the long shot you will do what is right=]

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Anonymous #
1 month, 2 weeks ago (1 month, 1 week after post)

That’s good to know!..I have three questions:
How long have you been best friends?..and how long did it take before you fell in love with him?. If you both love each other how come you haven’t gone at it?
Just Curious,
Thanks!

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