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Its good that you can at least list some pros!
Also… in a way its encouraging that you said you are depressed half the time, because this means you are not depressed all the time…
And you are in a better position to turn your life around than if you were fully depressed!

You know I get like that sometimes. Just to rant… i was thinking about making a post. You do not think good of yourself… I just got done listening to the final audio recording in Jonestown… and I am speechless .. so if I come off blunt, don’t worry it is not you, just my head is fuzzy. You are 21 and live with your parents, my sister is 30 and lives with my parents and brother for that matter; so I do not think that you should really use that as a means to judge yourself. Alot of people have no life, including me, so you are not alone there… I understand what you mean by not knowing exactly what is going on with the “friendship” concern. I am the same way… I have one friend and my family that is it. My only friend is my boyfriend… and when I say that - I mean it… only other people I associate with when they are his coworkers. That does not mean there is anything wrong with you, does not mean you are not nice, or attractive, or caring, I wish I could explain why some people just can never seem to get the friendship thing down- than maybe I would figure out my problem- the key is to not let it make you feel like something is wrong with you are that you have no good qualities. Not all good decent people have thriving social lives,… just may not be in the cards for them, but that doesn’t mean that you are strange.. you seem like you are older than your age… chances are simply can’t relate to people around your age.. that is usually my problem. Please let me know if any of this helps, lol, and I will be glad to respond more… just need a sec :)

Ah… now we are getting somewhere :D
I think you need to look at what your dreams are…
And say to yourself… how are these dreams achievable….

Which ones are big and which not so big… that’s when you start to get into goal setting territory and that’s when you start to actually get somewhere :D

Now don’t let that bother you!
I’m 32 and I never plan to grow up!
Responsiblities are things you can take on bit by bit!
What are your dreams, if you don’t mind me asking?

I’m a dreamer myself, and I’m working towards making my dreams come true! :)

You have a lot of things going for you (after all, you listed some of them), and you’re still young enough to do something about the things about yourself that you don’t like. Start with just one of the cons you mentioned, focus on it, and do what you can to change things. And remember, you aren’t alone — there are a lot of people out there that feel the same way as you do. I hope this helps.

Truth is you really one need that one great friend.. so yes if you had a girlfriend of wife that was your ideal best friend.. you would find that simply having that one person you can trust 100% is more than having 50 friends you trust 50% of the time. You may act younger, but that doesn’t mean that you think younger. I am sure you are pretty easy to get along with, as am I, having no problems laughing with people and generally having a good time- the way you feel though, certain things about you could be older.

I know slayed, that is why I have grown to accept it and not take it to heart- yeah it does get depressing at times, but it happens to most people- today is one of those days just cause my one friend is going to hang out with work friends and I have to fill my time somehow… those moments are when it hits ya, but most of the time I am pretty happy with what I have. I am glad I came across this post :) Thanks slayed I totally understand and agree with you there.

It all comes in time Mike.

Oh… lol
I was expecting you to say you wanted to run for president, or write the definitive 21st century opera, or play at the superbowl or something!

I was hoping you had those kind of dreams….
I have no idea on how to find a wife… just yet! Sorry lol

You can’t try to force those kinds of things to happen like family and such, but you seem like someone who will find someone that will appreciate you and eventually all the pieces fall together.

Just keep in mind that alot of the cons you listed about yourself you can try to change, you just have to want to- whether you actively take time to look into those concerns or slowly accept them as pretty minor flaws in comparison to your good qualities. As far as the confidence and fear of going out on your own. Confidence can be built with the smallest changes you make or chances you take - it can be pretty amazing, once that is taken care of then that fear or nervous feeling about taking on any responsibility begins to become less and less.

mike_jj wrote:

slayed wrote:
You have a lot of things going for you (after all, you listed some of them), and you’re still young enough to do something about the things about yourself that you don’t like. Start with just one of the cons you mentioned, focus on it, and do what you can to change things. And remember, you aren’t alone — there are a lot of people out there that feel the same way as you do. I hope this helps.

I think about trying to focus on my weight…but then the other things bring me down and I figure it won’t make a difference.

Every little bit makes a difference. May be hard to see in the beginning, but those small changes in thought or behavior build up and usually you do not realize any change until it has already happened.

We are all there… don’t worry about it so much, I mean on this site alone… you know.. every other person feels the same way about life. If all the people who felt lonely and anti social and wanted to fix it and find friends ( just from this site) got together- all would be solved. So whenever it gets to you, just remember that most people in the world feel the same way, whether it be about weight or friends, or love, etc etc etc… and if you need proof you know the site to go to- even people who are alone.. really aren’t- if you catch my drift. If most of the world’s population were care free and had no issues and walked around with smiles everyday, loving themselves and their life…. this site would never have come to be. Just don’t give up on it… don’t let one or two or three cons about you make you ignore the good qualities you have, find pride in what you do like about yourself.. use that confidence to build up your strength to tackle what you don’t like. Cause if you don’t like who you are…nothing good will come from it.

I feel much the same way. I don’t have any advice because I’m in much the same situation and want out of it too. But you’re not alone in how you feel, if that helps.