=(
i am feeling depressed, and it so happens that whenever i feel this way all the bad memories and such come back to me…
About a year and a half ago I suddenly found myself in a relationship with someone about 12 years older than myself. He is a singer… I used to be a fan… I liked him, but I didn’t know him. He turned out to be an *******. He was abusive, physically and verbally. At first I didn’t know what to do… but being with him for about 2 months I had enough of it! I came out of the relationship broken down and unable (up to now) to trust anymore… he used to say some really nasty stuff to me… things like, ‘you know I’ve had BEAUTIFUL girls… newly wed brides call me and beg me to sleep with them! Girls call me and are so desperate for me to take their virginity’ and I’d be shocked to hear him say these things… tears would roll down my cheeks when he’d add ‘look I don’t wanna cheat on you, but if you don’t give me all that I need then I will have no choice… you are nothing compared to the beauties I’ve been with… they’ve been sexy, and rich, and they loved me sooo much!’ or when he’d hurt me he’d say, ‘ you should feel lucky to have me! Stop crying its no big deal, every girl goes through it…’ and he’d make fun of the way I was, and tell me stories of how his cousin hires prostitutes even though he’s married to a pretty girl… and when I’d ask why is she with him then? He’d say, ‘because she has no choice. She’s a woman!’ and he’d give me that look that’d say, ‘and I expect you to be just like her!’
Sometimes when I’m down all these things come back to me, and I start feeling horrible about myself… and I wish it was just that incident that I had gone through… but there are so many! I feel so tragic about myself! lol if I was a movie I’d bore people to death with one tragic event followed by another!
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