Love help: I love my 2 year old son and I want custody from the mother. - Help.com

I am not sure…is the mother unfit?

phuckit! wrote:
I am not sure…is the mother unfit?

Why does the mother have to be unfit for himto be able to see his son?

Dirt91, I think your best chance is to get half custody of him, you know set up visitation rights and yes bank statements do count if their is proof of money going from your account into hers.

because if the mother is unfit his chances of getting full custody is better, I know from experience

Bank statements should count, if it shows the transfers. You will need a steady job, a way to support him, a safe place for him to live, and adequate child care for when you’re working. You sound like you don’t have a problem with her mothering, you just want more time with him and not to have to pay child support?

Im not understanding here why you cant have shared custody of the child you both love ? Is she an unfit mother ? If you have him totally with total custody you’ll have to pay for everything, can you elaborate on this ?

Are you trying to get custody so that you don’t have to pay child support? That’s what it sounds like.

This was my thinking having custody means you get to pay for a lot more than you would probably with paying your child support. I maybe wrong here, I don’t know.

Short of committing murder or dealing in drugs, almost no mother is going to lose custody of a child in a divorce court. I was a notable exception in getting custody of our four-year-old son when my first wife left to “find herself.” The treatment of men in divorce courts is a national disgrace. Time and again you see wives who cheat, who neglect their children and who are too lazy to work inside or outside the home get custody of the children. It doesn’t matter how good the father is, or how bad the mother is, judges adhere to the theory that “a bad mother is better than no mother at all.” Women who complain about the “glass ceiling” in the workplace need to also voice a protest about the “glass ceiling” for men in the courtroom. By the way, two-thirds of divorces are initiated by women, and it’s easy to see why: they know they will almost always be victorious. Sorry if this sounds like an anti-woman diatribe; it is not. I am married to the most wonderful woman in the world. I wish every guy could have a wife like mine–what a happy world this would be! But as for the stinkers out there–and you ladies all know some–why not demand some “affirmative action” in our courts?

http://help.com/post/198712-should-i-…

Jame if you havent already can you give an opinion on this post too ? thanks

‘I wish every guy could have a wife like mine–what a happy world this would be’
sorry chev.jame I really don’t agree with you there. this is because im sure ur wife is too nice for tooo many idiots out there. some guys deserve nothing in life.

~LazyDaze wrote:

phuckit! wrote:
I am not sure…is the mother unfit?

Why does the mother have to be unfit for himto be able to see his son?

Dirt91, I think your best chance is to get half custody of him, you know set up visitation rights and yes bank statements do count if their is proof of money going from your account into hers.

I dont think the mother needs to be unfit either, but if she is, full costody!! If not, then I think every other week should be good… unless you are out of the way for school? Oh… hes 2, then daycare? But yea, you should be able to do that, make sure that you have a stable place, stable job, and have enough time to be able to take care of him. You need to make the courts see that you are doing a good job in your life, and as for the child support, its good that you do it yourself and have the statements to prove it, shows that you are responsible, but please remember, your son loves his mother, and there is a good chance he wants to be with her too. So half costody is a good idea, unless she is unfit. Good Luck!

What I don’t understand is all these questions. If you were legally divorced or separated and a lawyer is dealing with your case, you should have a temporary court order by now stating your and your wife’s right regarding your child, an agreement from both parents who raises the child at this point full time, and the other has how many times a month and for how long visitation right. It should also say how much child support you have to pay (temporary still) and in your cheque you should write where it says memo “child support payment”. Banks keep these cheques for up to 8 years, you have proof of this. Never give her cash or personal cheque without saying what was it for.
My understanding on the whole post you wrote here is that you want to avoid child support to get your son. Please clarify this as many of us here feel that is the only reason why you want your son. Also, it has to be a LOT of serious problems regarding the mother if the court will label her as unfit. So far she is the one who is there for your son 24/7 and that to me does not qualify as unfit. Your input is needed now.

One thing: there’s a kind of “stare decisis” in place for child custody cases. In other words, the courts do not like to disturb a preexisting arrangement. If your wife has had custody of your child for the past two years (assuming you were separated for that period of time), then it is very difficult to get the court to change that arrangement, because that is now what the child is accustomed to. In my own case, I was very fortunate because I had our son living with me for months while his mother was trying to “find herself” in the company of another man.

I agree, I think the courts to take into consideration, the stability factor of the child, hopefully the stability is in a good environment.