Pain and nociception help: Me and my partner split up 7 weeks ago today. - Help.com

Accept your pain. Have your good long cries if you feel like it. It’s okay to be hurt, feel alone, and feel like you have messed up. Accepting responsibility for your mistakes or shortcomings is healthy, but you must also accept that you are a good person, and this is not all one-sided. Of course, a stage of denial is completely natural, but acceptance is the key to being able to begin to move on.
Think through everything thoroughly, but not obsessively. Go ahead and mull it over, as many times as necessary, within reason. Consider all the reasons you two broke up. Even if it seems there wasn’t a good reason, there certainly was one - and probably more than one. Understand that you enjoyed one another for a while, but even though everything seemed okay to you, if the relationship was not what your partner wanted for life, it would have ended eventually, no matter what. In this case, better sooner than later.
Deal with the hate phase. This is where you want to just scream because you are so angry, even furious. The amount of anger you feel all depends on how bad the split was, how it occurred (was there infidelity? That makes it worse), and how long it took to make the final break. There may be feelings of resentment at your ex for wasting your time. You may realize the breakup was inevitable (hindsight will reveal clues you failed to notice at the time). You may even feel like you hate yourself, but let go of that feeling fast! It’s a waste of time to be hating and ripping yourself apart over something you no longer have the power to change.
Talk to your friends. They are always a source of advice and help. If you are close with any family members, they may be a good source of advice/guidance. You want people around you that love you and who will help you see that you should love yourself too. Surrounding yourself with compassionate, loving friends and family will help you see yourself as a worthwhile, worthy person again, and you’ll find it easier to get steady on your feet again with your loved ones around you in a comforting net.
Write all your feelings down. Write in a journal or write poems. Most of all, be absolutely honest and don’t edit yourself as you go. One of the best results of writing it all down is that sometimes you will be amazed by a sudden insight that comes to you as you are pouring out your thoughts onto paper. Patterns may become clearer, and as your grieving begins to lessen, you will find it so much easier to “get” valuable life lessons from the whole experience if you’ve been writing your way through it. No relationship is ever a failure if you manage to learn something about yourself from having gone through it all with your heart open to both joy and pain. Just because it didn’t work out doesn’t mean it wasn’t a necessary part of your journey to becoming who you’re meant to be. Allow at least the learning part to enrich your life.
Clean up! A breakup can signify a new beginning. Therefore, cleaning your personal space will leave you feeling refreshed and prepared for the new things to come. A mess can be overwhelming and depressing, and will just add to your stress level. The added bonus is that keeping busy with tidying your space doesn’t require a lot of brain power, but does require just enough focus to keep you from recycling pain. Occupying yourself with these tasks designed to make your life better and easier will also occupy your mind enough to help you through the residual pain.
Keep fond memories, discard painful ones. Sometimes there are things that remind us of another person. Say, you hear a song or see a picture that reminds you of your ex, you probably get all sad and worked up. Well, instead of feeling that way, turn the station and move on - don’t dwell on the pain. But if you have a keepsake, such as a watch or a pin that was given to you by your ex, and it makes you feel good to wear it and remember the good parts of your relationship, by all means, do so.
Find happiness in other areas of your life. Whether that means spending time with your friends and family, taking up that class you’ve always wanted to take, or reading every book on the New York Times bestseller list, remind yourself that a relationship is one part of life, but even when you are in one, there are personal pleasures that you can always enjoy on your own. Indulge in those things now. As they say, the best revenge is living well.

I am also going through a separation that is 9 days old and the pain can be very bad.
One of the hardest things I find is that I never know what to expect from one momment to the other, Phuckit has some very good advice in the response and be kind to yourself, it will take time and I do not think there are shortcuts, in mine I should have know better, I fell in love with a girl who has a very bad track record in relationships, 4 divorces by 40, however when I say fell in love I do mean fell in love.
The heart is a funny thing, I know better but still allowed myself, and I will learn to look at the learnings from the past and hopes for the future.
I am just a guy who can only do what I feel is best.

My partner finished with me 4 days ago, i am tottally in bits dont know what to do. He said he still loves me but cant keep going through all the arguments about his ex wife which is mainly down to me because of jelousy. I asked him if maybe in a few months we could try again but he said he cant make any promises the thought of him with someone else will kill me what do i do. what do i do