life help: ~Should I Ask For DNA Testing~ - Help.com

thanks helpbot… appreciate your help.. lmfao

Kyle_01 wrote:
Lol, i was born blue faced too :D

really…

my whole body was pure blue… lack of oxygen.

2511 wrote:

Shie wrote:
thanks helpbot… appreciate your help.. lmfao

lol

Shie wrote:

Kyle_01 wrote:
Lol, i was born blue faced too :D

really… my whole body was pure blue… lack of oxygen.

Ewwww….

If you want to know for sure, yeah, do it…

my sister and i talked about it… and due to the facts that my dad is dying, we dont want him to get upset with all of it and cause more issues for him.. but we are seriously thinking about doing it after he passes… because its a question that i have always needed to know the answer too..

Kyle_01 wrote:
mine wasn’t due to a dna or blood problem though. I just was to much of a bad a$$ to cry and take my first breath when they were spanking me lol. :D

hahahahahahahahaha… stubborn.. lmfao..

Kyle_01 wrote:

Shie wrote:

Kyle_01 wrote:
Lol, i was born blue faced too :D

really… my whole body was pure blue… lack of oxygen.

Wow…O_o that’s crazy lol. U are one lucky person ;P

yup.. i have been a survivor since my very first appearance here on earth.. imagine that life… lol..

miss_enigma wrote:
I would go for it hun, if only to know for yourself. Will it upset your parents?

as for my dad… although i have been treated soooo horribly by my parents… i could never spring that onto my dad being he is so sick… but with my mother.. when m;y dad dies.. i am thinking of doing it.. seriously..

sans wrote:

Shie wrote:

Kyle_01 wrote:
Lol, i was born blue faced too :D

really… my whole body was pure blue… lack of oxygen.

Hahahahahahaha, that explains everything!

hahahahahahahahaha…. never thought of it that way… lmfao.. and roger blamed it on the dying of my hair blond all those years… lmfao..

sarah galindezz wrote:
this happend to me also but it was a few days after being born i turned pure blue and did not breath came seconds away from death due to severe asthma still have it. im sorry to hear about your situation but like i said you really should do what you feel is best and if u have any doubts at all even 1% then thats a great reason

thank you…

Nante wrote:
I think you should get the test, but you never know, genes can lay dormant for years wich could explain everything.

that is why i think i need to know… what if they arent my real parents.. how would my life have been i guess..

miss_enigma wrote:
I do see a resemblance but that could just be me.

which part if you dont mind me asking..

Bogdan wrote:
Your family is your family, it doesn’t matter if you have their DNA or not.

trust me… if i sat here and told you stories of my life and how i was raised.. and if they were blood related.. you would tell me differently… they are nasty nasty people… mean.. and self adsorbed.. and only wanting anything to do with me when they need money..

sans wrote:
Will they agree to the test? What do you hope to gain from it? Not doubting you, just asking.

i dont think my mother would have a choice.. and i guess its just to ease my own mind… my own thinking… thats it..

miss_enigma wrote:

sans wrote:

Shie wrote:

Kyle_01 wrote:
Lol, i was born blue faced too :D

really… my whole body was pure blue… lack of oxygen.

Hahahahahahaha, that explains everything!

lol …does, doesn’t it?! Just teasin Shie ;) Don’t feel bad, I was dropped on my head, over and over and over. I smell burnt toast.

hahahahahahahahahahahaha…

sparkydannyman wrote:
I’d do the dna test. It won’t hurt anything, except maybe some feelings if at all. And wow helpbot is awesome. lol

lol… that he is… or is helpbot female… hhhmmmmmmmmm…

you are right.. cant hurt anything… as for my mothers feelings.. i really am not worried about that all that much… as i said.. the way that i was treated all my life.. the beatings that i took because i cried because i just wanted to be a kid… while raising her children so she could play nintendo all day… whats a little hurt feelings on her part?

Vilén wrote:
Your biological family doesn’t matter nearly as much as the one who raised you.

but to me… i was never their child… no parent in their right mind could treat a child in such horrible ways… i mean, even now… im 33 years old.. and the only time they call is to ask for money…

AND… when i was going through family court to save my children because i ran with them from an abuser…
i walked into court one day.. and there sat my parents… for the abuser… why you ask… because he had money…

-Rose- wrote:
OOooooooooooooh you answered everyone hehehe.well my sister looks the complete opposite of me. i have light hair and an oblong face and colored eyes. she has brown hair and a round face and brown eyes. no one can tell that we are sisters uless we tell them. i think you should get tested without your parents knowing so you can get your peace of mind. tho if you look at your sister she looks kinda like you but with different coloring :Pgoood luuuuuuuck :D

her nose is weird.. turns up… she is a bit concerned with her dna too… you see, my parents were getting a divorce.. and as they were reconsiling… along came the pregnancy of my sister…

she is 5 times the size of me… and that is just weird.. neither i or my brother are that big.. so where did those genes come from? she herself has questions about her own paternity.

-Rose- wrote:

Shie wrote:

Vilén wrote:
Your biological family doesn’t matter nearly as much as the one who raised you.

but to me… i was never their child… no parent in their right mind could treat a child in such horrible ways… i mean, even now… im 33 years old.. and the only time they call is to ask for money… AND… when i was going through family court to save my children because i ran with them from an abuser… i walked into court one day.. and there sat my parents… for the abuser… why you ask… because he had money…

***hugs***:(

its ok.. i actually took off for 3 years… not caring what happened to them, telling them to both drop dead… only to learn that my dads condition got a lot worse and i forced myself to come back into their lives.. because i lost it… cried for days… the moment i walked into that house.. i gave them a piece of my mind… and things were good for a while.. but then.. time went by and here we are.. at the same boat that is slowly sinking… all because i dont have money..

miss_enigma wrote:

Shie wrote:

Vilén wrote:
Your biological family doesn’t matter nearly as much as the one who raised you.

but to me… i was never their child… no parent in their right mind could treat a child in such horrible ways… i mean, even now… im 33 years old.. and the only time they call is to ask for money… AND… when i was going through family court to save my children because i ran with them from an abuser… i walked into court one day.. and there sat my parents… for the abuser… why you ask… because he had money…

My parents did the exact same things right down to sitting with my ex in court! Geez eh?? Nothin says lovin like that lol.

i know…. and even if they were my biological parents.. i told them… i dont care if my kid shot someone right in front of me… i would know the guilt, but i would be there supporting my child… letting them know that i cared… what they did was absolutely wrong… but of course, i didnt say it so nicely to them.. lmfao..

bluflames83 wrote:
its horrible that you were considered switched at the hospital, i cant imagine that..but i definatly see resemblences looking at the pictures, just with how your faces and eyes are formed..i wouldnt bother with dna tests..

no?

miss_enigma wrote:
fu**ers! lol man it feels SO good to say that sometimes :D

miss_enigma wrote:

Shie wrote:

Vilén wrote:
Your biological family doesn’t matter nearly as much as the one who raised you.

but to me… i was never their child… no parent in their right mind could treat a child in such horrible ways… i mean, even now… im 33 years old.. and the only time they call is to ask for money… AND… when i was going through family court to save my children because i ran with them from an abuser… i walked into court one day.. and there sat my parents… for the abuser… why you ask… because he had money…

My parents did the exact same things right down to sitting with my ex in court! Geez eh?? Nothin says lovin like that lol.

hahahahahaha… i know….

bluflames83 wrote:
if i were you, no i dont think i would go for testing, just seems like a lot of work and waiting when i can see the resemblance clearly..

hhhmmmm….. and you are right.. maybe there is something that others can see… that i can not.. maybe i am blinded by all the horrible things and words that i heard of being switched that cause me to rethink this..

Nante wrote:

Shie wrote:

bluflames83 wrote:
if i were you, no i dont think i would go for testing, just seems like a lot of work and waiting when i can see the resemblance clearly..

hhhmmmm….. and you are right.. maybe there is something that others can see… that i can not.. maybe i am blinded by all the horrible things and words that i heard of being switched that cause me to rethink this..

People tell me and my siblings we look alike all the time but we dont really see it, I still think you should do it though, after all that happend to you, you deserve to know for sure.

thank you nante, and its not to try to change anything about my life… its just a question that has haunted me all my life..

bluflames83 wrote:

Shie wrote:

bluflames83 wrote:
if i were you, no i dont think i would go for testing, just seems like a lot of work and waiting when i can see the resemblance clearly..

hhhmmmm….. and you are right.. maybe there is something that others can see… that i can not.. maybe i am blinded by all the horrible things and words that i heard of being switched that cause me to rethink this..

i am told i look nothing like my older brother. both my brothers have blonde hair and i dont. the way i see it, if i had the money and time to get testing, i wouldnt because it wouldnt really matter to me at this point if there was a mix up at the hospital because it wouldnt effect any decisions i would make soon. however if its important to you to know, then by all means you should do it..

thank you…

Snar wrote:
I say, go for the test.

seriously thinking of doing it once my dad passes away..

babacup wrote:
I see a resemblance in the eyes. You really do not need to get your mother involved at all. You can get tested to see if you and your sister or brother share the same DNA. If it is going to make you feel better to finally know, I say do it.

By the way, my three children all look different. My daughter had brown hair and eyes like me and olive skin. My middle son has blond hair, hazel eyes and fair skin. My youngest has red hair, blue eyes and very white skin. The only thing they all have in common is they are all tall for their age. They do not share any facial resemblance’s to each other. Other family members they do, but not each other.

how weird.. but with me… and even with my sister.. there is no one in our entire family that looks like us.. no aunts, cousins, nothing..

babacup wrote:
Have you checked to see how expensive it would be to have the test done?

not too bad.. about 320.00

babacup wrote:
That is not a bad price to pay for peace of mind. You should do it.

im actually really thinking about it…

fengshuisweetheart wrote:
Wow! No matter what the genetics, what terrible ways to talk to a child… what burden to put on your shoulders.

Which would make you more disappointed, though? You might want to talk to a counselor to prepare for the flood of emotions that might result either way….

you are right.. i have actually thought about that too… what if it turns out that they are not my biological parents… what if my whole life is a lie… what if these monsters really had no right to torture me? what will i feel if they arent… will i be angry? will i be sad? and that is another thing that scares the crap out of me..

i have to say this too… as with my parents, who have stolen money from me since i started working at the age of 10, or even just last year by stealing my insurance money for my car that got wrecked…

they never ever call me to find out how my tumor is … or just how im doing… they will go months in between phone calls… and those calls are only to find out if i have money they can borrow… so today… i decided to rub a bit in their faces… again, my mother called… and i decided to tell her about my multi million dollar lawsuit and how its finally going through…

i was telling a woman who i consider my step mom about it.. and we are awaiting to see if they start contacting me more often… (because of this)… i just wanted to know.. does money really talk to them???

littlenick wrote:
Shie, would you really want to find out? Really? I would advice against it! Don’t bring old hurts and old pains that maybe it’s time you let go and forget! Give yourself some peace of mind and don’t dredge back all the bad feelings that you might have developed over the years for your siblings or your mom.

as for my siblings… my brother, he is 13 years younger than me… and i raised him… even when i moved out at 16, he was still at my house and i raised him… so he loves me unconditionally… as for my sister, she is 9 years younger and the same with her and raising her… but i find many faults with her.. and am not very close to her.. but this is something that doesnt just cross my mind.. it cross’s hers too… its something that she wants to know as well..

as for my parents.. sometimes i feel, so what if i hurt them.. big deal… but then there are those times such as the finding out my dad was worse.. where i just lose it.. and cant deal with the pain that they suffer… it sickens me to know that behind this wall that i have built up… i still care about them.. and i dont understand that.. at all…

fengshuisweetheart wrote:
It is very tough, Shie; you have been through so much. I hope that whichever decision you make, you find peace in it. I’ll be thinking of you as you make this decision. I’m heading to sleep. Take care.

thank you hun… nighty night.

obamadaisy wrote:
I dunno.. I stared at your sis and you and you both seem to have the same sense of peace in your face. Your chins look the same to me.. do you guys have the same fathers? But I guess if you seek to know the truth, well go for it.. but ask yourself this… will it make a difference? if yes, what sort of complications can arise from it? is it really worth knowing? :)

we dont know about the fathers.. as… my mother i know gave birth to my sister… but at the time of conception, my parents were trying to get back together.. as they were split up… so we arent sure if ‘dad’ is her dad or not..

and you are right… what will happen if i do find out that they are not my real parents… i know that i will probably be angry… i know that i would really want to search out my real parents… possibly siblings..

gerry51 wrote:
Shi I got three kids and none of the look like they are brother and sisters. Dana the oldest has blonde hair,and Eric has black hair he looks a little like me, Stephenie has red hair and doesn’t look like either of us. I don’t know if this helps but I hope it does.

it does… thank you.. also, i have a stephanie too.. lol.

Mt592200 wrote:
It would be a hard choice for u to want to know but if it turns out you’re not theirs then its not your fault or your patents you’re definately old enough to ask for a DNA I’m sure you won’t get all dramma queen about it if worst comes to worst. Good luck on whatever u decide on doing . And strength

i understand its not either of our faults.. but the thing that gets me the most is that… the way that i was treated because of not knowing… on my mothers part… even though she didnt know, i was still ‘her’ child… know what i mean? as for any drama queen, no…. because as you said.. it wasnt their faults..

twin wrote:
will it make you feel better? Your parents are your parents. Accepting the unknown is more rewarding in character then finding out a truth you can live without. And character is what I believe is something we want to pass onto our children.

im not sure if it will make me feel any better… im not sure what it will make me feel.. i just know the questioning has been on my mind since i was able to think.. as for passing anything down to my children…. my children are all teenagers.. and i have never passed any of my raising down onto them… i treated them like a mom is suppose too.

anyways… thankyou all for very helpful advice… it really helped me to think of what i plan on doing.. for now… im not exactly sure because you all have had a pros and con effect on me.. i guess i will have to wait and see… as i will not do anything until my dad passes away anyways… ….

great big hugs..