Well when somebody types in that they want to die it usually means they are asking for someone to stop them, if that person really wanted to die then they woud just do it and not talk about it.
So, showing a sign of doubt means they are confused and wanting help to get out of how they are feeling, sometimes just being there and talking to them when they feel this way stops them from doing it and more often than not it was just a low moment and feel much better later, things are sometimes done in the heat of the moment and killing yourself is something that you can’t stop to regret after it is done.
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Snuff wrote:
i think that is a good question, but i think its because suicide is agenst the law
Hows that?
You can’t get arrested after you have commited suicide..
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Snuff wrote:
no like attempted suicide
Not illegal at all, I have attempted suicide a few times.
I think maybe you mean assisted suicide, where someone helps someone else to kill themselves or know that someone will, that is illegal.
I still don’t get it… sorry, my mind is hazy..
dogoneit wrote:
I still don’t get it… sorry, my mind is hazy..
What don’t you get?
If someone says they want to die they will not just get ignored people will try to help them through it, no one knows what is after death or if there is even an after death, people assume it is a quick fix and also when you feel so depressed like that your way of thinking is distorted, other people may be abvle to see things clearer and help.
What I don’t get is this:
Why do some criticize them? What is wrong for taking the “easy way out”? What is wrong for “being weak” and “giving up”? What’s so good about life that people keep on trying to drag those who want death? Do you people imply that life = good, and death = bad?
People are people and as humans it is in our nature to survive so when someone does want to give up weak or not then there is usually a deeper reason for it and that is what other do not understand, I don’t know why people would critisize it, someone who is that low can not help feeling the way they do but most things in life can be fixed and death is a permanant solution to a temporary situation.
seems you are upset with as you say “some who criticize them”
No one here is criticising them they are trying to help if they can.
I think life is better than death don’t you? Unfortunately it is also sometimes a hard tough struggle.
A “good” life is better than death, yes.
I don’t know. I’m still confused. I want to know if giving up is bad. I want to know if it’s bad to long and accept your death while you’re still alive.
~LazyDaze wrote:
Snuff wrote:
i think that is a good question, but i think its because suicide is agenst the law
Hows that?
You can’t get arrested after you have commited suicide..
Lol!
I think, though, you generally try to stop someone if you think they have plenty of things to live for and just need help to see that. Or if they are just going through an awful time, they don’t see that it’ll get better but you do.
Also, maybe, if you are mightily close to them and you know how sorely you will miss them you try to stop them (to maybe save yourself heartbreak.
If its someone posting on here, you try to stop them as you probably won’t be able to manage with the worry that they may have committed suicide and you did nothing to help. Thats not a dig at anyone on here by the way.
Im not fully sure.
Thats a real good question though dogoneit :)
Feeling that you can’t go on is ok I think but thinking that there is no other way other than death I would say is the time you need to go and get help.
For all we know life is the best bit and death is the hard bit.
I also think about others people who have it even worse than we possibly could and they never think of killing themselves, like people who live in the 3rd world, they have fammine, illness, death, crime, abuse around them day in and day out yet you hear of about cases like the the 2 young children brother and sister who try their best to survive with what they have after they lost both parents to aids in the same year.
it is not bad to think about death. To accept & long for dealth while you are alive I guess does happen such as with the elderly when nearing a natural death. In that case it is not bad. To do the same thing before someones time is bad, dont you agree.
I don’t know.
Yes, other people may have it worse. But they probably have higher motivation to live. Or I may simply call them “stronger”.
But if you’ve done everything to help yourself? What if you’ve been trying your hardest to be sane and yet it does not change the fact that death is the only answer you seek? Do you now have the right to give in to it?
Dont just rely on yourself - You should seek help from others better qualified to give that sort of help.
Yeah. Maybe.
I’m sorry for bothering you all. I don’t find my questions that “interesting” or “good” or whatever, honestly. Let’s just say I have been desperately trying to stop myself from doing anything drastic, that’s why the question.
I really want to see a doctor but they cost a lot. We don’t have suicide prevention hotlines, too, like other countries. I can’t even tell me family because they’d surely freak out, which would require me to end up assuring them that “I’m fine now, it’s okay, I’m okay, relax.” I’ve tried that before.
Ahhhh… it’s so easy to die, so hard to live… and yet human has to break his attachment to the life surrounding him before he can actually face death…
Sad…
There is absolutely nothing inherently “bad” about death. It is after all the final stage of life; that is a natural death. Unnatural deaths take loved ones by surprise and is of course very hurtful. This includes suicide and fatal accidents, murder etc. Part of that is the thought of our own mortality I think. If a class mate commits suicide it only reminds everyone that they too could be dead tomorrow, and not many like to think about that.
Another big reason is that 95% of the people on this planet are religious, and have moral values attached to life and death. Not that it’s good or bad… but it is bad to take a life… including your own. The taking of life is God’s job.
Bright blessings ~ Richard
I hear you dogonit.
Death is a last resort. I’ve been with the terminlly ill when they decided to let it go, but that sooo dones’t sound like where you are at.
Is this right? You want see a doctor, you’d like to talk a hotline, you’d like family support, but it isn’t working out like it should? I hear you about family, it would be so nice if strong competent people rushed to your aid instead of family members freaking out and needing to be looked after themselves….
It wasn’t till I really faced death that I became decisive enough to make the hard changes needed to make life a “good” one as you say.
I like the thinking that you put into your responses.
Heh. A part of me still wants to know what’s so good about life that people, no matter how painful it gets, still try their hardest to survive. Sometimes, I wish for the moment wherein I have to face death - that maybe I’d finally realize what I’ve been missing all this time. If that would change how I view my life then perhaps it’s worth a shot… but once you challenge something as unpredictable as death, I can never be sure you’re going to have it your way.
So it’s either I kill myself, or live.
I am not sure if my love for my family is a good thing that keeps me from doing what I want. I can’t say that my pain is still insufficient because I still care for them more than selfishly indulging myself. It’s just that it’s actually more painful to be held back by the things/people that you love (I can’t say I love death. I’ve never met death to love it.)
Now I sound like I’m contradicting myself.
What I’m trying to say is:
Thank you for the responses, thank you for giving well-thought of answers. And I’m not killing myself, at least not today. Not tomorrow, too, I am presuming. For now, my desire for death is second priority. The first is actually finding a way how my death won’t hurt my family, which is, perhaps close to zero.
dogoneit wrote:
no matter how painful it gets….
… keeps me from doing what I want.
From what you’ve written, it sounds like reducing the pain and having a good life is more what you want? And death is just a plan B?
If you had a terminal illness and medically there really wasn’t any option but a slow painful death ( dang my inability to cure cancer arrrrr), but if there is still a chance for making plan A….
chunkymove wrote:
From what you’ve written, it sounds like reducing the pain and having a good life is more what you want? And death is just a plan B?
=)
I would like to believe that. Good life is better than death.
I have a seemingly good life, chunkymove. And I am healthy without even trying (or maybe I just don’t do medical checkups). I graduated from, well, civil engineering. I am now licensed, too. I am taking up graduate studies. I would like to believe that if I want a job, I can somehow get a decent one. I have a business that is doing good without me having to supervise it intently. And, of course, I have a great family (mother, father, and sister) who cares and loves me very much.
It is good life, no? At 22.
That is why I question myself why I want death badly. That no matter how much I try to lecture myself, at the end of the day I still wish for it.
Career-wise, I know I’m not where I want to be. I want to be with arts, or at least lock myself (or go to some other place) and write my dream novel. This is, perhaps, a great factor that causes me pain. I’m not doing anything to achieve my dream. I’m even forcing myself to become a masochist and continue with something, which is far from the real me. This will be more complicated, though, so I’m stopping here. =)
Aside from my failed dream (which I can’t even say “failed” because, god, I’m only 22), I can’t think of anything more that is causing me this pain that drives me to desire death. Maybe it’s my past. Maybe it’s the wrong choices I’ve done before and that I still haven’t forgiven myself for “being wrong”.
All I know is that ever since I was 16 years old, or maybe younger, I’ve wanted death. And that, at 18, I scheduled it to be my death, which obviously did not come to pass. And that right after my scheduled death, all I could think about is “when, when, when”.
Maybe it’s just my mind that’s gotten used to thinking and wanting about it that it needs no reason anymore.
And maybe I’m fortunate, too, that I’m the kind of person who wants to be logical of my actions. Or that I simple can’t leave the people I love so much.
AH!! I JUST WROTE A LENGTHY REPLY!! O_O
ANYWAY,
I don’t know what is plan A and plan B. I honestly have no personal dreams that I BADLY want to accomplish aside from dying. Good life is optional. Writing a novel, focusing on art, are all optional.
Wow, when I read what I wrote… I sound so unreal. Pained but openminded hahaha!! They don’t even match.
dogoneit wrote:
[quote chunkymove]
Wow, when I read what I wrote… I sound so unreal. Pained but openminded hahaha!! They don’t even match.
Mmm… maybe I’m just in good mood now. ^_^ I cried good a little while ago and now I’m back to, uh, researching how to quantify pain and grief. HAHA!
Wow. That really seems like a perfect life. I kinda think sometimes “If only my life was like that I would be happy”. Guess being happy is much simpler than that.
Seems like writing that out was some help…
Surely you would “run off to art school” before you seriously “wanted death”?
Good to hear that you’re feeling better. Whats the block to talking to a councillor?
Also, good to hear about the crying. I grew up in a culture where men just weren’t allowed to even think about that, but it can be soo helpful.
chunkymove wrote:
Wow. That really seems like a perfect life. I kinda think sometimes “If only my life was like that I would be happy”. Guess being happy is much simpler than that.
It’s comfortable. I can’t say I’m really happy, but I’m grateful.
chunkymove wrote:
Seems like writing that out was some help…
Haha, yep. Thanks to you. And you actually read my long responses haha! Amazing.
chunkymove wrote:
Surely you would “run off to art school” before you seriously “wanted death”?
What? Now it’s art school vs. death? =)
Honestly, for now, I still think I’d opt for death. But I don’t have the courage to achieve it. On the other hand, art school would not make my family cry. =) Maybe, they’d just sigh and shake their heads, but they knew right from the beginning where my heart is.
chunkymove wrote:
Good to hear that you’re feeling better. Whats the block to talking to a councillor?
Uh… I don’t know anyone. I tried searching but their fees are quite expensive, but I think I can spare a few money if that will help my sanity. =) The only real thing that’s making it more difficult is finding one, going to them (I’m not really good at places), and keeping it a secret from my family.
chunkymove wrote:
Also, good to hear about the crying. I grew up in a culture where men just weren’t allowed to even think about that, but it can be soo helpful.
Well, it’s good that I’m female. =P I have an excuse. I just don’t cry in front of people. Well, unless you cry secretly and nobody knows, it’s fine. Even if you’re a man. =)
Crying is nice. I cry when I’m tired. I cry when I’ve so many decisions to make. I cry almost every night. Hahaha.
Thank you for conversing with me. =) I really feel okay now. When I started this thread, my head and chest were aching badly.
That you are 22 and in Graduate school, and have your own business, is very impressive. Maybe you just need a vacation?
When was the last time you did something for yourself, and took it easy for a while?
dotspot wrote:
That you are 22 and in Graduate school, and have your own business, is very impressive. Maybe you just need a vacation?
When was the last time you did something for yourself, and took it easy for a while?
Thank you.
Vacation sounds nice…. To be honest, though, I’m pretty laid-back (wow….) and, although I’m easily exhausted, I am not doing anything physically arduous. My mind is tired, though. So many decisions, so many things to consider everyday, and now a research study that needs to be done… But I’m taking it pretty easy in business and studies…. it’s even bordering to irresponsibility now, although I’m also pretty lucky, too.
Despite this, I still want a vacation… must be nice not to think about anything else….
=) Thank you for all your opinions and support. I’m very fortunate, I know that. I am not filled with hatred, either. I just don’t like myself. Well, maybe it’s the only thing I hate.
But I’ll be fine.
So thank you. And yes, I think I’ll try to have a REAL vacation before this year ends.
Your very welcome, it’s nice to be able to help. Good to hear your feeling better :-)
some ideas if you want them…
I realise that I don’t understand your enviroment there, but a councillor might be a huge help.
Cost. Huge return on investment, you and your sanity are so worth it.
Finding one. Google. I don’t know your country but they are pretty easy to find.
Going there. “not good at places” don’t understand…
Family secret. They should be professional enough to keep secret.
Or combine it with dotspots great idea and have a holiday and fit in a few visits to a councilor in far away place.
Another option you could explore would be to fit artistic expression in your current life. Take up painting on the weekends or something.
haha, forget all that.
holiday :-)
You type fast, chunky! D:
Yep, thanks. “Not good at places” - I meant I can be easily lost. xD I tried google, but found just a few… on places that I do not know. Uh… mother and sister are too nosy. They have to know where I’m going. I rarely lie so…
But I’ll go to visit one. I’m intent to do it.
And vacation, too.
Now I have to sleep. I deeply thank you for your time and effort.
your welcome, and thanks for your insight on regrets.
Sleep well.
lol im buyin a gun on wednesday and killin myself so **** all of u guys
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justin38344 wrote:
lol im buyin a gun on wednesday and killin myself so **** all of u guys
You can easily buy a gun??
If i have a gun easily i will kill myself sooner or later
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