girlfriend help: I’m having a hard time getting turned on lately.

please just help me

I’m having a hard time getting turned on lately.

I don’t know what’s going on. My girlfriend and I are long-distance, so intimacy can only occur through webcams and things like that, and it’s fine whenever we do that, but I don’t have the same reaction to it anymore that I used to.

I think it’s because when we first started out, we were both pretty shy and a little hesitant at doing it, but lately everything has just been really easy and we do it almost every time we talk.

I don’t know. Maybe it’s because, even though she’s far away, there isn’t much to fight for anymore. There’s little challenge in our relationship now. I’ve bought my plane ticket to see her, and though it’s still two months away, it just seems sort of complacent. There isn’t any excitement anymore.

What should I do? (Aside from talking to her, that is.)

Also, I should note that, even at the age of twenty-three, I am still a virgin. She will be my first. Maybe it’s the stress and nervousness and anticipation that is giving me a decrease in libido.

This open post was written 1 year, 1 month ago | V/U/S: 1,166, 8, 4 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post please just help me may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. please just help me is a verified member, has been around for 1 year, 4 months and has 34 posts and 399 replies to their name.

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Beauty, webcam, Distance, challenge, Far Away, Intimacy, speech, long distance, Like That, girlfriend (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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please just help me edited this post 1 year, 1 month ago. Read the previous text »

I’m having a hard time getting turned on lately.

I don’t know what’s going on. My girlfriend and I are long-distance, so intimacy can only occur through webcams and things like that, and it’s fine whenever we do that, but I don’t have the same reaction to it anymore that I used to.

I think it’s because when we first started out, we were both pretty shy and a little hesitant at doing it, but lately everything has just been really easy and we do it almost every time we talk.

I don’t know. Maybe it’s because, even though she’s far away, there isn’t much to fight for anymore. There’s little challenge in our relationship now. I’ve bought my plane ticket to see her, and though it’s still two months away, it just seems sort of complacent. There isn’t any excitement anymore.

What should I do? (Aside from talking to her, that is.)

Help me with: Anyone here know a thing or two about fashion and personal style?

highfrye420 9 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (11 minutes after post)

dude things will be different when u see here, everything will be fine.

Help me with: Post here and talk to me about anything!

please just help me 6 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (19 minutes after post)

Easier said than done. I worry about it not being different, which is which is making it worse. How do I get through this?

Help me with: Anyone here know a thing or two about fashion and personal style?

Godfather 19 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (23 minutes after post)

Don’t worry about your first time. Things will be different, the excitement involved with actually physically feeling that heat of her body against you is an exilerating experience. The excitement will overpower the fear and you will have no problem rising to the occasion.

If you are worried about getting aroused over long distance, than I suggest you stop “pleasing” yourself, and wait until you see her over webcam. Set specific times when you see each other online.

Help me with: I have an idea for my future that I find exciting.

♪The Music of Love 1 #
Santa Barbara, CA, US | 1 year, 1 month ago (27 minutes after post)

its prolly that you’re so ready to take the next step that the things you used to do aren’t as exciting anymore, but your first time is more than juz going through the motions of making out or in your case whatever you do on the webcam. anyhow im a girl so i dont know how it is for guys but yea. I picked a very awkward conversation to join. :P

Help me with: I cant sleep yet again so instead of the history I should be working on I was wondering if its common to look in the mirror

please just help me 6 #
An Unknown Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (8 hours after post)

@ Godfather:
That’s the thing, I don’t please myself by myself. I can’t. That just doesn’t excite me anymore. I can only do it when I’m talking to her, and even then it’s not all the time. I don’t know. She just has such a healthy libido (it’s because she was taking meds that reduced her’s, but now she’s off them and it’s skyrocketed). I guess I’m also a bit afraid or intimidated that I won’t be able to keep up. Maybe I should go on meds for a while, then come straight off them when I go see her! :P

Help me with: Anyone here know a thing or two about fashion and personal style?

darsmars 1 #
An Undisclosed Location | 1 year, 1 month ago (9 hours, 12 minutes after post)

maybe u kinda over did it everytime u talked online becuz it seems routine’ish’ now. try different things like surprise her with silly things and or shows planned starring ‘Dude’ lol .maybe ask her what she does to suffice the same feeling if she is feeling it too. i wish you well on this one, its a tough one.

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Help me with: hi ppl, please let me know i am not alone becuz i feel totally alone right now…..

Anonymous #
10 months, 3 weeks ago (2 months, 3 weeks after post)

Hi JDL,

I am in the same boat as you. LDR with my GF and it is very difficult to keep things fresh. We only play a couple of times a week because of the time difference and the fact that it’s been like this for about a year now. I was worrying about the exact same thing as yourself, but when we did meet this year things were totally fine. There is a huge difference between being together online, (which you can be, and feel deep and strong feelings) and being together in person.

When you are together physically it will be such a turn on and so exciting your problem won’t be about getting it up :)
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself dude; just try to relax and enjoy things. Something that helped us was getting a couple of toys for my GF. It turns me on alot to see her come hard and she loves it. Everyone is different ofcourse but do communicate to your GF if possible your concerns, and perhaps try to spice things up a little.

Best of luck to you dude.

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