Feel help: can someone profread a sincere letter to someone. - Help.com

instrumentalmangle wrote:
your sexy girl…I love you

uh thats not really helping

dear (lets just say friend)

I actually had written you a reply shortly after I read your email. Only I was hesitant to send it because it was really mean, bitter, and just really cold. So I decided that before I make any mistakes on saying something that I might not truly mean, I should wait a while to send it. I hope this can clear things as to why the original was so awful. I really dont know if I really mean any thing I say. because i’m still confused on how I feel towards you.

Any ways I assume that this was your way of being “nice” to get rid of me and to just smooth things over. to make things in your life easier. I also made the assumption that we would probably never talk again. even if I tried to talk to you. I always feel like a fool making the attempt to talk to you. sometimes I just want to say hi, but I feel its asking for to much. so me trying to put myself in ur life isnt working for me. I guess you will just have to let me know when you want me there. Maybe this reply to you is just completely pointless. and if that is the case I hope you read this and know that the way everything happened, hurt.

I’m not really sure what I should say. In fact I have been thinking about this for a while now. Rereading and rewriting an email about how i’m not really sure how I feel. I’m not even sure what I should do. I figured trying to convince myself i never met you and to forget some fun times we had really didn’t happen, probably wasn’t going to do any good, but then again would it really matter? Were they even fun for you? does any thing i say or do have any effect on you? Before I felt really safe about wanting to see you as much as I could. but right now I’m not sure if having any type of relationship really matters. I hope you don’t think I’m to much of an ******* in saying that but in reality I feel like (or maybe I feel like) I can’t trust any thing you say. this is pretty much how i feel and have felt since reading your email. There just isn’t enough follow through on things you say sometimes. things are always left unclear. It makes me very uneasy.

I don’t want you to say, you want to visit if you really don’t mean it. I’m not that dumb, you’re a busy person and your weekends are probably busy plus its far away. I just don’t want to get my hopes up thinking that one day you will actually visit when you only meant that statement to smooth things over.

I hope you know that when I came to visit I came to see you because I cared about you, meaning if you needed any thing at all i would be there to help you and you know I would too. I was under the impression that you were genuinely a good person. and since i cared about you, I wanted to know more about you. I’m beginning to think that i am just too naive. and a sucker for thinking that no matter what happens we would still be friends. i guess I’m just mad that you acted the way you did when that wasn’t your intention .i feel like you got what you wanted and now you never have to see me again.

There’s so much i want to say but i can’t because I just don’t think you would know what to do with it. I’m not even sure if this is how i honestly feel towards you. and no this isn’t my reaction to you not wanting a relationship. I guess I’m just angry at myself for being so dumb. Dumb for believing every word and thinking that your intentions were sincere.

Can you just think for a second that I kind of believed you when you said you wanted me to move to NY with you and dance. you were drunk. but I guess I now know that you didn’t mean it. this isn’t so I can have the last word I guess this is just me telling you that maybe next time you meet a girl. you should just tell her that all you wanted is to get some. because then you wont get mixed up in situations w/ girls like me. I guess you can just add me to your list because I already put myself there. sorry this was bitchy but I dont know. I’m just so confused.

Maybe I am just expecting for the worst. Look at it this way, I understand you are busy. I am busy as well. I just don’t see how me being in your life fits. I’m not even sure how things would work if I were to say I wanted you in my life and how that would work. I mean. what if the tables had turned. there just isn’t time. I never had a reason to not trust you unless you gave me one, but I think you gave me one to many. none of this makes sense. I just end up being frustrated and angry. I wish you had said something before I went to see you. Instead of making a fool of myself.

yeah. which is always the case. but thank you. I think i’m just to nice.

i dont want to be like overreacting or say things i will regret. and i am jsut super confsued. he lives in brooklyn i am in NH. however i will be moving in july to attend school there. which he doesnt know. but i’m not sure if it would even matter at this point.

yeah you got it. he messed up on doing what he thinks is right and now what his heart feels.

this all started out as a summer romance lol. the kind you see in movies. only there isnt an ending yet. lol

well currently after what has happened. not really. but before i met him and while i was seeing him. extremely.

Joey_PR wrote:
Katie,
I hope you are feeling better,

I have a couple of questions….(answer if you like)
What good does this guy bring to you besides a “feeling” he can’t reciprocate?
Was he serious with you all this time or did you ‘assume’ he was?

Im a little confused myself.

My assumption was that he was serious. a lot of people knew about me where he worked, where we met. and when i went to visit him he made arrangments for a lot of things to show how much he really liked me. and how much he really cared. like.. i can’t swim and he had asked a friend to teach me. I think hes just scared.. i have met his entire family and friends and pretty much everyone hes grown up with. but i really.. just dont know. he did tell me the last time we spoke. that the decision he made was hard because ever since i left he didn’t know what to od. but he wanted to do what was right. that he does like me a lot and htinks about me all the time. but doesn’t want to hurt me or do something that he wil lregret. and his focus is trying to graduate and do the right thing. he has had a hard past of screwing up.

it might just be pointless to tell him. he knows that i will be transfering to ny or nj for school to study dance.

and thats the other thing. when we first started dating. i told him that hes gotten to know Me. meaning i dont normally let guys i date get to know me that well. normally i just let them know whats on the surface and nothing to deep. not many ppl have seen me dance before either. and he has. and i told him that if it was to much for him that maybe we should just be friends. because i had issues with letting ppl getting to close for the fear of being hurt.

well june until september. and he’s said thats the longest he has ever seen any one. and that the relationship we have is quite a unique one. i was also the first girl he had to wait to sleep with. im not sure about his past relationships but i dont think they were very good.

like i have this empty hallow feeling in my chest that hurts. and no matter what i do to fill the void nothing will amount.

yeah. i havent said any thing to him for a while or any thing at all because i think i need time alone to get over him i think. or atleast thats how i am acting.

lol thanx. i actually get told i look like juju chang shes on good morning america abc news. it will just take some time i guess i just dont know wat to say to him if he really wants to visit. lol i guess he prob wont. but oh well.. who knows?