school help: i really need help deciding what im gunna do. - Help.com

There must be some part of you that feels confident in proceeding in this area. Focus on that part and listen for answers from there.

If there is no part of you that is ready for this perhaps this isn’t the thing for you.

And no, you shouldn’t talk to him about your feelings.

Hah, i used to be a 2nd degree black, but i quit. Wasn’t being challenged enough…. I’m sure u know, but the reason those questions are there is because from there on out, if u are old enough, you will need teaching experience to earn your next belt (4th degree). It’s pretty much a requirement. The point of karate is for self defense sure, but also to develope character. The more u do it the more u will get used to it.

Talk to him about it and see what he says.

id talk to him, see what he says, at least make sure he knows about your doubts.
youd be surprised what youre capable of however, and he obviously believes youre ready for it.
btw kyle, thanks for the macho display there but it wasnt really nessecary man.

undeveloped wrote:
i do help teach now. thats the requirement for our 3rd. i just dont stand up for myself. i dont have that confidence.

lately ive been fallin away from karate, so i dont have as much interest as i once did in karate. i dont really have a character there. i just do my own thing, i cant seem to make myself put myself out there

I guess that’s kinda why i quit too. Our instructors couldn’t show us up, we weren’t being challenged (my friend and i) so we eventually lost interest. Tell him to not go easy on u guys. Tell him to make it like fricken boot camp lol

Urine Sane wrote:
id talk to him, see what he says, at least make sure he knows about your doubts.
youd be surprised what youre capable of however, and he obviously believes youre ready for it.
btw kyle, thanks for the macho display there but it wasnt really nessecary man.

Macho display?? lol. Didn’t sound macho to me,

undeveloped wrote:
why shouldnt i tell him how i feel?

im not bragging, but im really good at the physical part of being a 3rd degree, but i dont have the mental abilities to do what i have to.

do i tell him that im not ready for 3rd?

People will really look down on you if you start telling people you can’t handle things and have social anxiety disorder. I know it’s not nice but it’s the way of the world.

Kyle_01 wrote:
Hah, i used to be a 2nd degree black, but i quit. Wasn’t being challenged enough…..

i wouldnt think that people will look down on you. god, everyone needs help at some point in their life. its impossible to do everything on your own. talk about it now before it gets worse.

The karate coach really doesn’t want to have to deal with people’s personal issues. If you can’t handle the sport, look into doing other types of things that fit with your personality. You need to keep info like that for the closest of people like family and doctors.

well if his karate coach is a mentor then he for sure could confide in him.

If you tell stuff like that to random people they will start to look at you like you are a crazy person. It is not socially advantageous for a guy to talk with his coach about his feelings and about a social anxiety disorder.

try cognitive therapy - reject the negative thoughts… when they come actively refuse to continue a negative though as soon as you realize it’s a negative thought (such as “I lack confidence”)… I’ve found recently that there is a distinct difference between “fact” and “truth”… so you *feel* like you lack confidence, yet you say

undeveloped wrote:
…im really good at the physical part of being a 3rd degree…

so you don’t really lack confidence, just one part of you is feeling that… the truth is you’re fairly certain you are quite competent but you have some doubts… it’s ok to have doubts… I think if you push though I you’ll be fine!

Cheers

its not hes blabbing to everyone on the street, hes considering confiding in one person whom hes probably known for years.
many, many people confide in persons other than their parents or doctors. sometimes its hard to talk to those people.

That’s probably best. I still think the same thing.

Cell wrote:
The karate coach really doesn’t want to have to deal with people’s personal issues. If you can’t handle the sport, look into doing other types of things that fit with your personality. You need to keep info like that for the closest of people like family and doctors.

I will invite more people to advise you.

Be honest….tell what you can and can’t do at this time…..It will do you good. Ang it will give you peace of mind. I’ll pray for you. “Heavenly Father,” this morning I pray for this young person who needs guidance..that you give the right decision…enable honesty to always be part of dealings with people. Give peace of mind and joy always upon this young person…..In Jesus most precious name I pray, Amen.”

Confidence comes with age. You are only 18 and are already a 2nd degree black belt. That is quite an accomplishment, in my book. I don’t believe you have SAD. Or anything else for that matter. Express your feelings to your Sensei if you want and ask him/her how you can gain more confidence to go for the next level. Your Sensei wants you to succeed. Trust their wisdom.

You have to decide now…..be brave because God is with you. Don’t fear the future when you obey God. He will bless you throught and through.

the best way to get over this is to go through it. just do it and think less about it.

yea. its just as easy as that. say you wanna talk to him, then tell him whats on your mind. it doesnt have to be a big deal, just keep it as a small one in your mind.

Tell him you want to wait with the 3rd degree belt until you feel confident enough to take such responsibility. Tell him you want to learn more about self-control as you know karate teaches you that, you don’t act upon your feelings. Telling him everything about how you feel right now and hinting him your low self-esteem at this point will definitely tell your coach you are acting upon your feelings. While telling him you want to learn more will show him how confident you are. After all, you are still developing mentally, emotionally, and otherwise, you are only 18. Ask for another year’s training.

How did it go buddy?

Fear is sometimes a good thing. Sometimes fear is telling you something would be unwise.

Tell your instructor so he can help you.