Boy help: Is there a secret to having good conversations? - Help.com

YOU sound very interesting to me :D probably b/c we have a lot in common. I hate gossip,like philosophical conversations and have little sense of humor just to name a few. Whats a golf clap? I never heard of that. to answer your question, no , i dont think theres a secret, sure conversation is or can be an art. I have a couple links I can get on the subject but Im more interested in the purpose of the post, if you dont mind. I mean, its a nice intro, bio but what are you really asking or looking for?

There’s nothing wrong with awkward silence, it’s better than hogging the conversation. My rule for a good conversation is LISTEN, and I mean really listen. You shouldn’t just be hearing what they’re saying, but understanding. If you don’t understand, ask them a question. If they’re not talking, then ask a good question or two about the person, but don’t bombard them, they’ll feel intimidated. If the conversation just isn’t working, fake an excuse and get out of it. Haha

http://www.hodu.com/default.htm ‘ effective communication’

hello?

PROTIP: you need to open your mouth before you can talk

AmandaLynn wrote:
I didnt read all your post, but i will give you my opinion on a few key things to having good meaningful conversations beyond just idle chat.

1. You cant be afraid of confrontation.
2 You need to be grounded in what you think and do and why you think and do it.
4. You have to be ok with agreeing to disagree sometimes.
5. You need to be slow to speak (not unable to speak) and quick to listen. Not taking everything personally and offensively deff. helps in this one.
6. You have to let others own their own opinions and choices and dont take them on to yourself as your own or you’ll end up trying to fix them.
7. Let “information” be what is presented and “understanding” be the goal. Its always the most profitable conversations when a deeper understanding of one another, a particular subject, or whatever it is you are talking about is achieved.

I didn’t read your entire list but my advice for you is that people generally don’t respond well to a list of requirements. Try to personalize things a little.

LOL, your post was funny.

What are the great comedians if not showing the foolishness of everyday situations.

“Just what exactly is a conversation? Everyone I ever considered to have a “conversation” with is, quite frankly, more of an interview” hahaha

I think if you want more than idle chit-chat, your going to have to find a group of people that are actually interested in the things you are.

Consider audience and purpose.

Purposes might be…

- to find commonality and build friendships.
- to communicate logistical information.
- to validate the other persons feelings
and many more

If you aren’t interested in the people around you, your not going to get a rolling conversation happening.

You like “philosophical things”. As in the classic unanswerable, or you walking a new path?

I personally like talking philosophical things. get an account, start a post about something on your mind and see how it goes.

Anonymous wrote:

AmandaLynn wrote:
I didnt read all your post, but i will give you my opinion on a few key things to having good meaningful conversations beyond just idle chat.

1. You cant be afraid of confrontation.
2 You need to be grounded in what you think and do and why you think and do it.
4. You have to be ok with agreeing to disagree sometimes.
5. You need to be slow to speak (not unable to speak) and quick to listen. Not taking everything personally and offensively deff. helps in this one.
6. You have to let others own their own opinions and choices and dont take them on to yourself as your own or you’ll end up trying to fix them.
7. Let “information” be what is presented and “understanding” be the goal. Its always the most profitable conversations when a deeper understanding of one another, a particular subject, or whatever it is you are talking about is achieved.

I didn’t read your entire list but my advice for you is that people generally don’t respond well to a list of requirements. Try to personalize things a little.

Um, here’s a start. This person was trying to help. Yes, they aren’t perfect in your view, but you asked for conversation info, and they gave up their time to give it. People don’t want to be in a conversation where they are going to get in trouble for not following your rules.

AmandaLynn wrote:
And just to let you know - i never said they were rules, they are suggestions. Its just what i’ve learned over my lifetime thus far and experience that helps produce meaningful conversations for me.

For a post about conversation, this has a few mis-communications.

I saw it like this… Amanda kindly gave a list of suggestions, but was rejected because anon thought they were requirements and not personalised. I was suggesting to anon to chill. My reference to “rules” and “getting in trouble” was about anons requirements and reaction, not to amandas suggestions, which I thought were pretty useful.